評論
打印
Big windows, lots of light, finished basement.
大大的窗戶，充足的光線，設備齊全的地下室
Why has this place been sitting on the market so long?
那為什么這房子這么久還沒賣出去？
It's a buyer's market, as we have discovered.
現在是買方市場了，而且我們也發現了
Tough time to sell.
比較不好賣
Is that why you reduced the price several times?
所以你們才降價這么多次？
You're really getting a steal.
你買到就是賺到！
Oh, I saw the patchwork in the basement.
對了，我看到地下室修補過
You have termite trouble?
是有過白蟻蟻鬧嗎？
Termites?
白蟻？
Well, this house is such a hospitable environment,
哎呀，這個房子，真的是宜人居住的好嗎
who wouldn't want to live here?
試問有誰不想住在這樣的地方？
So, what do you say?
所以，你覺得如何？
You know, you've done a good job renovating,
你造嗎，其實你們把這翻新的真的很不錯
and it's a great deal, so...
而且價格也很合適，所以
I'll take it. Oh! Ooh, yeah!
我買了，吼吼！哈哈，太好了
Smart!
機智如你
You and your family will be very, very happy here.
你和家人都會很開心住在這里的
Oh. Oh, no. I'm not gonna live here.
哦不，我不打算住在這
I'm gonna rent it out.
我打算把它租出去
In this market, renting's where the real money's at.
目前這樣的市場行情，租出去才能賺到錢
This place is gonna pay for itself a dozen times over.
這房子會得到10倍以上回報
Get out of my house! All right!
離開我的房子！真是的！
Bye-bye.
再見
Jessica, we've been trying to sell this house for months.
杰西卡，這幾個月來我們一直想要賣掉這個房子
We've been through Halloween vandals, black mold, termites.
我們經歷了萬圣節破壞者，黑莓，白蟻
Exactly.
正是如此
And after all that, we're only gonna break even.
我們做了那么多，就僅僅是不賠不賺
We're supposed to make money on this house.
我們應該在這房子上撈一筆才對
And if we rent it out, we will.
如果要出租，我們就自己租
"We" Rent it out?
“我們”租出去？
That man was right.
那個男人說得對
Why buy a sickly cow and fatten it up and then sell it for beans?
為什么養肥了一只病牛卻把它拿去換豆子
No.
不
You milk that cow every month...for 300 years.
你得每個月給這頭牛擠奶，怎么也可以擠個300年
But we don't know anything about being landlords.
但我們不知道怎么做房東啊
You have to find tenants, hire a real-estate attorney,
找租客，雇個地產律師
contracts, credit checks, handyman—
簽合同，做信用調查，還要找個做雜活的
Eh, that's all fluff.
嗯，基本上都是小事
We just need to find the right tenants.
我們只需要找到那些對的租客
I will take care of everything.
這些我都會安排好的
All you have to do is sit back
你什么都不需要做
and let the rent checks roll in.
坐等收租金就好
Oh, I love - doing crosswords with you.
噢，我喜歡和你一起玩你填字游戲
Such a great way—for us to spend time together.
這是個讓我們共度時光的好方法
Dad! We found the missing TV remote!
爸爸！我們找到那個不見的電視遙控器了
Oh, thank God. These are so boring.
感謝上帝，這個太無聊了
Where was it?
它在哪
This was a tough case.
這個案子很棘手啊
Some remotes don't want to be found.
有些遙控器，就是不想被找到
First, we had to rule out the obvious suspects—
首先，我們得先排除掉那些明顯的嫌疑對象
couch cushions, the magazine holder in the bathroom,
沙發墊，浴室的雜志架
Grandma—but they all checked out.
祖母，但是檢查過都沒有
So where was it?
那它在哪？
You left it in the pantry.
你把它落在儲藏室里了
The...pantry? That's...odd.
那個...儲藏室？真...奇怪
I...don't go in the pantry.
我...不去儲藏室啊
I believe you do go in the pantry—
我堅信你去過了儲藏室
to cry after you watch a certain movie called "Babe."
在你看完“小豬Babe”那部電影后去那嚎啕大哭
"That'll do, pig.
“這就夠了，小豬”
That'll do."
“這就夠了”
Well you found the remote.
哦了，你們找到了遙控器
Thank you.
謝謝
Here's a little something for your trouble.
這是你們的勞務費
Thanks, but we don't do it for the money.
謝謝，但我們不是為了錢
We do it for justice.
我們是為了正義
But w-we'll take the money, though.
但我，我們還是把錢收下吧
Another cased solved by The Huang Boys—
又一個案子被黃氏兄弟解決了
a perfect nine for nine.
一場完美的九投九中
Tell your friends.
轉告你的朋友們
"Tell your friends."
“轉告你的朋友們”
Yo, Dad, since you're handing out free money,
爸爸，鑒于你正在做“散財童子”
this is the Ironman watch, and I need it on my body.
這就是鋼鐵俠手表，我需要它戴在我身上
It has a lap timer, - a stainless-steel case back,
它有計時器，不銹鋼底座
and it's water-resistant up to 100 meters.
防水高大100米深
Aaaaaaaah! Ohhh.
啊！！！哦！
So you're a watch guy, like your old man.
所以你鐘情于手表 隨你老爸
I remember my first—
我記得我第一塊是
gold Casio, mini calculator, programmable alarm.
金色卡西歐，袖珍計算器，可編程警報
You should have seen it.
你真應該看看它
Oh, wait. You can see it.
等等，你可以看到它
Because it's right here.
因為它就在這
Ah. Listen to her sing.
哈，聽她的歌聲
That's the gentle tweeting of a punctual robot bird.
這是個準時的電子鳥的溫柔叫聲
I knew you'd feel me, Dad.
我就知道你懂我，爸爸
So, want to give me cash or...
所以，你是想給我現金還是...
Oh. So...why should I rent to you?
哦，哈哈哈哈，所以...為什么我要租給你？
Because I'm a family man, and my kids come first.
因為我是個家居好男人，一切以孩子為主
I work for a nonprofit.
我在一家非盈利機構工作
I served three tours in the Navy,
我在海軍服役三年
and I'm now teaching—
我現在正在教書...
I'm Jordan. This is my wife, Raquel.
我是喬丹，這是我妻子拉克爾
We filled out your application
我們填了你的申請
and included our college transcripts and LSAT scores.
包括我們大學成績單和LSAT分數
Hope that's okay.
希望沒什么問題
LSATs? So you're lawyers?
法學院入學考試？所以你們是律師？
Well, we're not in law anymore.
是這樣，我們不做律師了
We're in medicine now. It's just much more lucrative.
我們在從事醫藥工作，比較賺錢
I suppose it is.
姐也這么想
Um, okay. No pets?
好的，沒有寵物？
Nonsmokers?
不吸煙？
No weekend jazz bands?
沒有周末爵士樂隊？
You seem perfect.
你們看起來非常完美
A little too perfect.
就是有點太完美了
Sweetie...she deserves to know.
親愛的...是時候讓她知道
I knew it. What is it?
我就知道有問題，是什么
We never want to have kids.
我們永遠不會要小孩
Father, I'd just like to follow up
爸爸，我就想跟進一下
on our conversation yesterday.
昨天的對話
You're very close to me right now.
你現在離我太近了
While I explained the benefits of watch ownership,
當我解釋有手表的益處時
I didn't tell you all the ways
并沒完全說明
that not having a watch is ruining my life.
缺乏手表對我生活的傷害
Could you just back up an inch?
你能不能往后退一丟丟
When we're ordering pizza,
當我們訂披薩時
I have no idea—if it takes 30 minutes or less.
如果對方說30分鐘以內到，我完全無法判斷
I'm like, "You're late."
我會說，“你遲到了”
The guy's like, "Where's your proof?"
披薩小哥會說，“證據呢”
And I'm like, "Right here." "Oh."
我就可以說，“在這兒呢”“噢”
Eddie, don't make everything about pizza.
埃迪，別什么都扯上披薩
This is about responsibility.
這是責任心的問題
I know if I buy you that watch,
我知道如果我買了只表給你
you'll wear it for one day, then toss it aside.
你就只會戴一天，然后扔在一邊
I promise I won't.
我保證不會
I'll tell you what...
這么著吧...
If you can take care of my watch for one week
給你一星期時間，如果你能照看好我的手表
and prove to me that you're responsible,
向我證明你是個有責任心的人
then maybe I'll think about buying you an Ironman watch.
那么可能我就會考慮給你買鋼鐵俠手表
Yes! Deal!
棒棒噠，就這么說定了
Now, let me just give you a quick lay of the land.
現在我給你做個簡單介紹
Watch out for her light. It's a little fickle.
小心輕放，它有點傲嬌
She feeds on arm hair, so be careful.
有時會卡到汗毛，要小心點
The 7 button on the calculator is broken,
計算器上的數字7已經壞了
so you have to add the 3 and 4 first.
你得先加3和4
Or 2 and 5. However you want to do it.
或者2和5怎么弄都行
I don't want to micromanage that.
我不想管太細
Or 8 minus 1. Whatever. User's choice.
或者8減1隨便你，你的表你做主
You get a Chipwich, and you get a Chipwich!
給你個曲奇夾心餅，也給你個曲奇夾心餅
Do you know why it is raining Chipwiches?
知道為什么我會送你們曲奇夾心餅嗎
Because I just found us the perfect renters.
因為我找到了完美的租戶
You did?
已經找到了
Just deposited their check in my account.
剛剛把支票存到我賬戶里
I'll write you both checks for your share!
我會把你們的那份寫張支票
This is my money that I earned.
這是我自己賺的錢
It's not Marvin's money. It's my money.
不是馬文掙的，是我賺的
I got Honey money.
我有蜜蜜資金了
Good thing I convinced you both to invest in the property
我說服你們投資這個房產
and convinced you both to rent it out,
又說服你們把它租出去沒錯吧
because I'm a visionary.
因為我如此有遠見卓識
Oprah. Gayles.
奧普拉，蓋爾斯
Huang residence.
這里是黃公館
Is this Mrs. Huang?
是黃女士嗎
Yes, this is she.
正是鄙人
I'm calling to inform you
我們致電通知您
that the check you just deposited bounced.
剛在您存的那張支票跳票了
What? I don't understand.
什么鬼，我不明白
I know it's confusing.
我知道會有點困擾
The word "Bounce" Seems so positive
那個“跳”字聽著是件高興的事
like Tigger.
像跳跳虎
I don't understand
可我不明白
how my ear appointment can be approaching.
為什么我耳朵檢查的預約快到了
It feels like it was just yesterday.
好像昨天才剛查過
Okay, well, bye.
不過好吧，拜
Come on, come on. Write our checks.
來吧，來吧，給咱寫支票
Yes. Yes.
好呢，好吧
Your checks. Ha ha.
你的支票，哈哈
Here... you...
這是...你的...
... go. ...
支票
Yes! Thank you.
好耶，謝謝
Hi, Jessica. Hey.
嗨，杰西卡，嗨
Hi. So, there's been some kind of a mistake.
嗨，這里面好像出了點問題
The bank called yesterday,
昨天銀行打電話來
and they said that your check bounced.
說你們的支票跳票了
Oh, you know why?
噢，我知道咋回事
That's probably because there's no money in our account.
大概因為我們賬戶里沒錢了
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's for sure it.
對對對，絕對是這樣
Yeah.
沒錯
What do you mean, you have no money?
你說沒錢是神馬意思
It's kind of a long story.
這說來話長
Come in, come in. Come on.
先進來吧，進來，進來嘛
Please, have a seat.
請，隨便坐
We're having cash-flow problems.
我們的現金流出了點問題
But I thought you were doctors.
你們不是醫生嗎
Oh, no. God, no.
噢，不是，絕對不是
We were enrolled as guinea pigs in these drug trials,
我們只是作為試驗對象報名參加了一些藥物試驗
but then we got disqualified.
不過后來被取消資格了
Yeah, when we said we were in medicine,
嗯，當時我說我們在醫藥（行業）里面
I guess, technically, the medicine was in us.
我想，嚴格說來，應該是藥品在我們（肚子）里面
So, I guess you didn't go to law school, either?
那么，我想你們也沒有上過法學院，是嗎
Oh, no, no, no. We did. We did.
不不不，我們上過法學院，上過的
We just...hated it.
我們只是有點...討厭它
It was so long and boring and expensive,
時間又長又無聊，還貴的要死
which is why we're so deep in debt.
所以我們才欠了這么多債
Honestly, we were surprised you rented the house to us,
說實話，你肯把房子租給我們，我們感到很驚訝
especially when you saw our credit report.
尤其是你還看了我們的信用報告
Fffft! Credit checks are fluff!
切！信用分算個屁
This is my credit check— my gut.
我的信用分就是這個——我的直覺（腸胃）
Then your gut's as bad as mine after that trial IBS drug.
那你的腸胃一定很不好，就和我吃了IBS試驗藥以后一樣
Speaking of, the toilet's backed up.
說到這個，這里的馬桶堵住了
Can we get the number for the handyman?
能不能把維修師傅的電話給我們
Fluff!
都是屁
You know what? Forget this.
知道嗎?這個你們不用管了
Pack your—
趕緊收拾
Knock, knock!
咚，咚
Didn't mean to interrupt,
我們不想打擾的
but we just wanted to stop by and meet the new tenants.
只是想順道過來拜訪一下新房客
Yes. These are them—our perfect tenants.
好吧，他們就是了，完美的房客
Jessica's been raving about you guys.
杰西卡對你們一直贊不絕口
Guess who spent her share on a fancy hat-of-the-month club.
猜猜誰用份子錢參加了當月帽子俱樂部
Protected by Viper. Stand back.
威霸守護，速速退散
It's nice to meet you.
很高興見到你們
Want to come in and play "Geese Lord"?
要不要一起玩誰是鵝主
You know what? We would love to, but we just can't.
知道嗎？我們很想，但是不行
We're very, very busy.
我們非常，非常忙
So, apparently, my dad
顯然，我爸爸
has been sending letters to our old address,
一直在給我們以前的住址寫信
but, honestly, he's been gone from my life for so long now,
但是，說實話，他已經從我的生活中消失了這么久
I wonder if I even want him around.
我都懷疑我到底想不想讓他回來了
How do you miss someone who—
你怎么會想念一個
Hold up! Where's my watch?
等等，我表去哪了
Where's my dad?!
我爸去哪了
I lost Dad's watch!
我把老爸的表弄丟了
Give us all the details.
把細節都告訴我們
I had taken it off to shower on Saturday.
星期六洗澡的時候，我把表取下來了
I know I put it in a safe place—
我記得我把它放在一個安全的地方
on top of G-Dubs.
基博士的上面
One witness—toy glowworm.
目擊者一號，螢火蟲玩具
And then, I don't remember.
接下來我就不記得了
I don't know if I put it back on afterwards.
記不清后來有沒有再戴上過
Maybe. I don't know!
有可能，我不確定
Client's memory unreliable.
客戶記憶不可靠
Possible victim of amnesia.
可能得了失憶癥
The Huang Boys are on the case.
這個案子黃氏兄弟接手了
We need to dust for fingerprints.
我們需要收集指紋
I'll get the flower.
花由我負責
Need a ride?
要搭順風車嗎
Oh, is that—
噢，這是
My leased Probe?
我用份子錢買的探索者
Yes. Yes, it is.
沒錯，就是它
She's got a full tank of gas.
油箱已經加滿了
If we wanted, we could probably make it
如果想的話，說不定我們可以
all the way to N'awlins.
一路開到勞蘭斯去
Oh. I can't.
噢，我不能去
Uh, I-I have to go check on the tenants.
我要去房客那里看一下
Turns out there's a little plumbing issue.
他們的水管好像出了點小問題
Oh, no. Well, then, I'll come help.
哦，不是吧，這樣的話，我也去幫忙
Oh, no! No, no, no. It's fine. I got it.
別別別，沒事的，我搞得定
I was gonna go anyway, because...
反正我也要過去，因為
...I got them a welcome gift basket.
我給他們準備了一個歡迎禮籃
Oh, perfect! I'll give it to them.
噢，太好了，我來給他們吧
Oh, that's so nice of you to think of this.
虧你能想到這個，你簡直太好了
You know, that's why we're great partners—
你知道的，我們之所以能成為最佳拍檔
because you think of these kind of things.
就是因為你能考慮到這些事情
Now, go to N'awlins, you nosy bitch!
現在，去勞蘭斯吧，你個小八婆
All right.
好吧
Hi. How's it going?
嗨，最近怎么樣
Hey, Jessica.
嘿，杰西卡
I was just trying to drive beers into the living room.
我正準備把啤酒搬到客廳呢
What's up?
有事嗎
If you have money to waste
如果你們能把錢浪費到
on pizza and video games and tiny cars,
披薩，電子游戲和玩具小車上
you have money for rent.
你們就一定有錢交房租
Move.
讓開
No more cable. Nonessential.
別插線了，沒必要
No more takeout. Make your own food.
外賣也別叫了，自己做飯
This is a schedule for the Florida bar.
這是佛羅里達司法考試的時刻表
You're gonna hit the books and pass it.
你們要鉆到書里去，然后通過考試
Get real jobs. Yeah. Okay.
找一份真正的工作，嗯，好的
Yeah, I mean, we're not good with money,
嗯，我是說，我們不善于理財
so this is actually really helpful.
所以這非常有幫助
And until you pay me what you owe me,
等你們還了欠我的錢以后
you're the handyman.
你自己就是維修工
Fix the toilet yourself.
所以，自己去修馬桶
And fix up the place while you're at it.
把你們住的地方收拾收拾
Add value.
學會增值
Maybe a blueberry patch.
像藍莓片一樣
Sorry, G-Dubs. We're almost done.
對不起，基博士，我們快弄完了
I think he likes it.
我覺得它挺享受的
Boys, I need your help.
兒子們，我需要你們幫忙
I lost Eddie's watch.
我弄丟了埃迪的表
Twist.
神轉折啊
Talk to us.
和我們說說
Well, on Saturday,
嗯，星期六那天
I walked past Eddie's room
我經過埃迪的房間
and saw he had carelessly left my watch lying on his bed.
看到他粗心大意地把我的表扔在他的床上
So I took it to teach him a lesson.
我想給他上一課，就把表拿走了
And then I lost it.
然后又弄丟了
Possible irony.
造化弄人啊
Dad, Eddie took off the watch
老爸，埃迪把表取下來
because it was his shower day.
是因為那天是他洗澡日
His shower day is on Sunday.
他洗澡日是星期天啊
He switched it to Saturdays
他換到周六了
because he gets so worked up during "American Gladiators."
因為他玩"美國角斗士"的時候累壞了
Gladiators, ready!
角斗士，準備
Oh, no. He just took it off to shower.
啊，不好，他摘手表只是為了去洗澡
I need you to find that watch before the end of the week.
你們得在這周末前幫我找到那只表
And whatever you do, don't tell Eddie.
還有無論如何，千萬別告訴埃迪
Permission to extend bedtime so we can solve the case?
請求推遲睡覺時間，好讓我們解決問題
Crime doesn't sleep, and neither should you.
罪惡未眠，你們也不該睡
The hell? "Fiduciary."
什么鬼？“信托人”
Why is there a chicken on the front lawn?
門前草坪那為什么會有只雞
We took your advice about making our own food to save money,
我們接受了你的建議，自己動手豐衣足食還省錢
so we got some chickens,
所以我們就買了些雞
and it cut our breakfast budget to zero.
然后我們的早餐預算就降到零了
What are you ...
你們到底在...
Zero? No kidding.
零？真的假的
We had to pay for the chickens
但是買雞得花錢
and the materials to build the coops
做雞籠用的材料得花錢
and the food and the vet bills ...
雞食要花錢，還有獸醫也得花錢...
we got them microchipped ...
我們還給它們植入了芯片...
so the savings should kick in in about two months.
所以，省錢計劃得倆月后才能見效
Out! Get out!
出去！滾出去
You two are hopeless!
你們兩個簡直無藥可救了
Pack your bags. I'm evicting you.
卷鋪蓋吧，我要驅逐你們
Oh, we're not leaving.
噢，我們不會走的
Mnh. Since you made us study for the bar,
嗯，因為你逼我們準備司法考試的關系
we remembered that we have these things called rights.
我們記住了我們也是有權利的人
Yeah. Legally, you can't kick us out.
是啊，從法律角度來說，你不能趕我們走
If you did, we could have you arrested.
如果你硬要這么做的話，我們可以找警察抓你的
Sorry. No hard feelings.
不好意思，別難過哦
Here. These are for you.
這樣吧，這些是給你的哦
Ohh! They're warm!
噢!還是暖的!
I don't want your warm, homemade butt eggs!
我才不想要你們這些從雞屁股里出來還帶著溫度的蛋呢
You're gonna love them. Yeah.
你會愛上它們的，就是
Hey! Pull over!
嘿！停車！
Yeah, right there. Stay.
對，就在那兒，停好了
I know I was speeding, but my sister ...
我知道我超速了，但我妹妹她...
Oh. Hi, Jessica.
噢，是你啊，杰西卡
Officer Bryson, I need your help.
布萊森警官，我需要你的幫助
I've got deadbeat law students in my house.
我的房子里住著兩個想賴賬的法學生
I rented the investment property to them,
我把投資房產租給了他們
and they refuse to leave.
他們現在賴著不肯走
Oh, so you've got squatters.
噢，你是碰到了非法占居者
That is the perfect disgusting word for what they are.
這詞用來形容他們再完美不過
Unfortunately, I can't help you.
不幸的是，我幫不了你
The law is very much on their side.
法律絕對是站在他們那邊的
You can't just turn them out.
你不能就這樣趕他們出去
So they can just stay in my house,
那就是說他們可以繼續住著我的房子
not pay rent,
房租也不付
and I can't do anything about it?
然后我還拿他們一點辦法都沒有
These people are not my mother-in-law.
他們又不是我婆婆
So, can I go?
那么，我能走了么
Just remember ...
記好了...
driving is a privilege.
駕駛可是一種特權
Any progress? We're running out of time.
有進展嗎？我們快沒時間了
Good news, Dad. We heard back from Casio.
有好消息啊，爸爸，卡西歐給我們回信了
Turns out, the watch was manufactured in 1985.
證實，這只表確實是1985年制造的
Your story checks out. You're no longer a suspect.
你的口供沒問題，你已經擺脫嫌疑了
Guys! What's going on with ...
兄弟們！我那件事...
Dad! What are you doing here?
爸！你在這干嘛
Oh, nothing. Just, uh, coming in to...
沒事啊，我就是，就是來...
ruffle the hair of my boys.
來捯飭捯飭我兒子的發型
Oh, well, I also... came to ruffle.
是啊，我也是...也是來捯飭發型的
There you are.
可不是嘛
All right, then. Uh, yeah. I'll see you later, then.
好吧，那么我們待會見
Yeah, see you around.
好的，待會見
You're sure you want me to shut the power off?
你確定要我關了電源
They've left me no choice, Jerry.
他們讓我別無選擇啊，杰瑞
I tried to teach them. They refused to learn.
我嘗試教他們道理，但是他們不肯學
I went to the law. The law turned its back on me.
我查過法律了，法律是站在我這邊的
Shut it down.
把電源關掉
Now turn off the water.
現在把水也停掉
Now sic this stray cat on the chickens.
現在把這只流浪貓放到廚房里
She's got the scent. Send her in.
她聞到味道了，把她放進去
She's formulating a plan of attack.
她正在策劃著一場大襲擊
Apex predator.
獵殺王
No.
不
Candlelight is so romantic.
燭光真的太浪漫了
And who needs water when we have margaritas?
有了瑪格麗特誰還喝水啊
No ice, so they're room-temp, just like in Mexico.
沒有冰塊，所以是室溫的，就像在墨西哥一樣
Mexico's nailing it.
墨西哥！棒棒噠
Oh, baby, look. Look at them.
寶貝，看，看看他們
Man taught you to hate each other, but you said no.
人類教導你們要厭惡對方，但是你們不接受
Should we have a kid?
我們應該要個寶寶么
Yeah. I want that.
當然，我想要
Okay, good.
好，很好
Thank God! The Huang Boys did it!
謝天謝地！黃氏兄弟做到了
Well, Dad, it's the end of the week,
爸爸，已經是周末了
and I still have your watch, like I said I would.
我還拿著你的手表，就像我之前說過的一樣
Well, look at that! Impressive.
看看啊!真令人佩服啊
I never should have doubted you, Eddie.
我真不應該懷疑你，埃迪
We solved it! We found the missing watch!
我們成功了！我們找到不見的手表了！
Wait.
等等
If that's your watch,
如果這是你的手表
then... whose watch is this?
那么，這是誰的手表?
It's a new one. I bought it.
這是塊新的，我新買的
I saw my watch lying in your room,
我在你的房間看到了我的手表
and I thought you were being careless,
而且我覺得你粗枝大葉的
so I took it to teach you a lesson.
所以我想用這件事情來教育你
I shouldn't have...
我不應該
that's my robot bird.
是我的電子提示音
It isn't either of these watches.
不是這兩塊手表發出的聲音
Ma, why do you have my watch?
媽，你為什么要拿走我的手表
But I'm your son.
但我是你的兒子
Why are you messing with me?
你為什么要和我開玩笑
Wait—if Grandma has your watch
等等，如果奶奶拿的是你的手表
and this is the watch you bought to replace it,
這塊是你新買的用來取而代之的手表
then whose watch do Evan and Emery have?
那么埃文和埃默里拿的是誰的手表
We bought it—with our justice fund!
我們買的啦，用我們的評審費
We'd solved every case,
我們解決了所有的案件
and we didn't want to ruin our perfect record.
并且我們不想失去我們完美的記錄
Looks like the real victim in all of this
看起來整件事里面真正的受害者
was the truth.
是真相
I'm too young for this crap.
我還是個寶寶，不適合處理這些破事
Squatters?
釘子戶們
They won't leave.
他們不會離開的
I thought you said that—
我記得你說過
I didn't know how to tell you I was wrong.
我不知道該怎么告訴你我是錯的
I got us into this situation,
我深陷其中
and now I don't know how to get out.
現在我卻不知道該如何脫身
So, those checks you wrote us came out of your own account?
所以，你是從你自己的賬戶里提錢給我們寫的支票
Yes.
是的
I'm surprised - you were able to cash them.
我很吃驚，你竟然付得起這筆錢
I signed them "Montana Moorehead."
這些支票上我簽的是“蒙大納穆爾頭”
I don't understand why you didn't just tell us the truth.
我不明白你為什么不告訴我們真相
Because I'm supposed to be a visionary.
因為我本來是想做一個有遠見的人
I'm supposed to be Oprah.
我本來想成為下一個奧普拉
You invested your money in that house because of me,
因為我你把錢投資到了那間房子
and it's been nothing but problems.
但這卻只跟你帶來了麻煩
I convinced you to trust me,
我讓你信任我
and I failed.
但是我失敗了
Did you know Oprah got fired?
你知道奧普拉被解雇過么
What?
什么
Early in her career,
在她剛剛開始打拼時
from a local news station in Baltimore.
被巴爾的摩的一家新聞站
Did she let that stop her?
這件事使她放棄事業了么
Did she give up?
她放棄了么
Did she take her lapel Mic and go home?
她有摘下自己的翻領麥克風然后回家么
No. No. That's right.
沒有，沒有，是這樣的
She didn't.
她沒有
And neither will you.
所以你也不會放棄
So, this first investment property didn't work out.
盡管，你投資的第一個房子失敗了
So what?
那又怎樣
The next one will.
下一個投資會成功的
The important thing is that you keep going,
重要的是你能夠堅持下去
and before you know it,
然后你就會在不經意間
you'll have a horse farm and your own book club.
擁有一個馬場和自己的書友會
Thank you, Honey.
謝謝你，蜜蜜
Now I know Oprah can be Oprah because she has Gayle.
現在我知道奧普拉會成為奧普拉是因為她有蓋爾
And Gayle can be Gayle because she has Oprah.
蓋爾能成為蓋爾也是因為她有奧普拉
Sure.
當然的
Maybe. No.
或許吧，不是
Yeah, that was too far. I felt it.
我想的太多了，我感覺到了
Okay, so, I know
好了，所以，我知道
we made a little less from the sale than expected,
這次的出售額比我們預期的要少一些
but at least the squatters are now the new owner's problem.
但是至少現在那些釘子戶是別人的麻煩了
Here. Take your share.
給你，你的錢
Or...reinvest it.
或者，再投資一次
Jessica, I don't know.
杰西卡，我不知道
I just feel lucky not to have lost money.
我只是覺得沒有損失錢實在是太好了
Oh, okay. That's fair.
好吧，能理解
Here. Take your checks.
給你，你的錢
Or...reinvest it.
或者，再投資一次
What does Florida have more of than any other state?
跟其他州比起來，弗羅里達什么最多
Alligators?
短吻鱷
Fuddruckers.
女服務員快餐店
Condominiums.
是公寓
Or, as I like to call them, condo-money-ums.
或者，如我所稱，叫，來錢快
Well, now we have to do it.
好吧，現在我們必須投資了
