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Hello. I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper. And welcome to Sheldon Cooper Presents: Fun with Flags, the Final Episode Flagtacular. I knew it was coming. Still scary.
大家好。我是謝爾頓?庫珀博士。歡迎收看由謝爾頓·庫珀出品的《有趣的旗幟》最終集：壯麗的旗幟。我知道會有拉炮。還是嚇死人家了。
Now, I'm sure you're thinking, "The final episode? Who will stand between us and flag ignorance"
我知道你們一定在想："居然最終集了，是誰要害你們變成旗幟盲了？"
I know I was thinking that. Is this a show on flags or mind reading?
像我就有這個想法。這是旗幟節(jié)目還是讀心節(jié)目啊？
But the truth is I can no longer balance a full-time career, a popular Internet show, and a girlfriend.
但事實上是因為我無法繼續(xù)兼顧全職工作，熱門網(wǎng)絡(luò)節(jié)目，以及女朋友了。
And he really does have one, you jerks on the comment board.
他是真的有女朋友，你們這些留言的混球們。
So as they say, all good things must come to an end. After only 232 episodes.
常言道，天下無不散之筵席。雖然僅有232集視覺饗宴。
233 if we include the one somebody forgot to press record on.
如果某人有次沒忘了按下錄制鍵，那應(yīng)該是233集。
You said you weren't gonna bring that up. And you said you pressed record.
說好了不提那事兒。說好了你會按錄制鍵。
Anyway, please sit back, relax, and join us as we take our final lap as indicated by the waving of this racing flag.
總之，用放松的姿勢跟著我們一起跑完這最后一圈，就像這只賽車旗指示的一樣。
And, of course, white flags can also represent surrender, the Stewards of Gondor, and the Japanese Minamoto clan.
當(dāng)然，白旗也代表"舉白旗投降"。剛鐸宰相 、日本源氏也都使用白旗。
But I'm sure you remember that from episode 62, "White Flags: Who's Wavin' 'Em and Why"
但想必你們肯定還記得這些，因為62集"白旗：誰舉白旗及緣由"都講過。
That was a good one. It was so good.
那集超贊。的確是贊到爆炸。
You know, I thought cleaning out a dead professor's office was gonna just be boring, but then I found his dentures and realized it's also gross.
我本來以為清理過世教授的辦公室會很無聊，不過在我發(fā)現(xiàn)他的假牙后，我才意識到是無聊加惡心。
Doesn't Professor Abbott's family want any of this stuff? I don't think he had a family. That's rough.
艾伯特教授的家人不想要這些東西嗎？我記得他好像沒家人。真慘。
I know. You can spend your whole life working, and at the end all that's left are some papers in a box.
是啊。一生都奉獻給了工作，最后留下的只有盒子里的一些研究資料。
Makes you think. Oh, well.
不禁讓你思索人生。算了吧。
Hey. Hey, we're supposed to look through all this stuff before we throw it away in case it's important.
喂喂，我們都得仔細檢查過這些東西，以確保不會扔掉什么重要資料。
I I did. It's all outdated or disproved.
我看啦，不是過世就是被拒的。
I don't know. This old pen kind of proves gravity. When I tilt it, her bathing suit falls right off.
不一定哦。這支舊筆"證明"了重力存在。翻轉(zhuǎn)過來，小人偶的泳衣就掉下來。
Oh, my dad used to have a pen like that. I dated it all through sixth grade.
我爸以前也有一支這樣的筆。我整個六年級都跟它"約會"。
It still feels weird just throwing away his work like this.
還是感覺很奇怪，就這樣把這些研究成果都扔掉。
Don't feel bad. Someday, someone will be throwing out your work, too.
不用難過。未來某天，也會有人來扔你的研究報告。
That someone was Sheldon, and the day was yesterday.
那個人就是謝爾頓，而那個某天是昨天。
Hey, look at this. "Dear Roger, to be opened upon your first great discovery. Love, Mom."
你們瞧。"親愛的羅杰，在你獲得首次重大發(fā)現(xiàn)時打開這瓶酒吧。愛你，媽媽。"
Wow, look at the date. He saved this 50 years and never got to open it.
瞧瞧這日期。他留了整整50年，卻從沒有機會開。
That's intense. Poor Roger Abbott.
真是讓人惋惜。可憐的羅杰?艾伯特。
Roger Abbott sounds just like Roger Rabbit.
羅杰?阿伯特聽起來就像羅杰?兔子。
Roger Abbott, Roger Abbott, Roger Rabbit. Oh, my God, Leonard, I know he's dead, but try it. It's fun! Roger Abbott, Roger Rabbit...
羅杰特，羅杰特，羅杰兔。天啊，萊納德，我知道這對死者不敬，不過你念念看。超好笑啊！羅杰特，羅杰特，羅杰兔...
Penny! Oh, my rookie of the year. Oh, Dan. My boss who didn't want to hire me and now's a little hug machine.
佩妮！我的年度最佳新人。丹，我一開始不想雇我但現(xiàn)在超愛抱我的老板。
Oh, look at you. Brand-new and already the third best sales rep. Why don't you come over to my table.
看看你，新加入不久就業(yè)績第三名。過來我那桌坐坐吧。
Yes. I'll be right there. Bernadette's just parking the car.
我馬上過去。伯納黛特還在停車。
Oh, good. Bernadette. Cute, sweet...vicious little Bernadette.
哦，好。伯納黛特，人萌音甜...惡毒兇殘的小伯納黛特。
Come on. She's not that bad.
別這樣嘛，她沒那么壞。
Oh, yeah? At the company picnic she yelled at me and my grandson for losing the three-legged race. I mean, he still calls her "That mean kid with the big boobies."
是嗎？公司野餐的時候，她吼了我跟我孫子，因為我們輸了二人三腿賽跑。我孫子現(xiàn)在還叫她為"毒舌大奶娃"。
I know she can be a little intense, but, I swear, she is so sweet once you get past all the...Hey, what are you talking about?
她有時候是有點兇，但我保證等稍微熟了之后，她就是很親切的一個人了...你們在聊什么？
Oh. We were just talking about how much we love working with you. Isn't that right? Dan?
我們在聊有多喜歡跟你共事。對吧？丹？
Over the years here at Fun With Flags, we've had an opportunity to learn, laugh, wonder...
在《有趣的旗幟》的這些歲月里，我們有機會一同學(xué)習(xí) 、歡笑 、驚奇...
And, yes, even shed a tear or two.
甚至落過幾滴淚。
Like when you do a two-hour Fourth of July spectacular and it doesn't get recorded.
比如國慶節(jié)做了兩小時特別節(jié)目，結(jié)果卻沒被錄下來。
How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?
到底要我道歉幾次才夠？
How about 4,000. One for every domino I set up to make that American flag. Please enjoy these highlights.
先來個四千次吧。向我拼成美國國旗的每一片骨牌道歉。請欣賞我們的精彩剪輯。
Crikey! What flag do we have today? Australia, mate!
"澳"喲媽呀！今天是講哪國的旗呢？澳大利亞，兄弟！
And now it's time for the speed round of Flag or Not a Flag.
現(xiàn)在到了高速國旗大鑒定的單元。
Flag. Flag. Not a flag. Flag. I am crushing this.
國旗。國旗。不是國旗。國旗。我太厲害了。
Say, Betsy Ross, what you working on?
貝特西?羅斯，你在縫什么呢？
I have no idea. Because the story of me sewing the first American flag is unsupported poppycock.
我也不知道。因為我縫出第一面美國旗幟的故事是沒證據(jù)的狗屁。
Then who did sew it, hmm?
那到底是誰縫的呢？
Don't ask me. I'm just a simple seamstress whose descendants are...out to make a quick buck!
別問我。我只是個普通的女裁縫，是我的那些不肖子孫出來騙錢的！
Fancy a dip, my dear? I do.
賞臉共泳嗎？樂意之至。
Wait, that purple flag indicates that marine pests, such as jellyfish, are present.
等等，紫色旗子代表了水域有海洋有害生物，比如毒水母
Wow, that flag is a lifesaver.
哇，這旗子拯"救生"命啊。
No. This is. Stop looking at my legs.
不是。這才是"救生"圈。別盯著人家腿了。
Not a flag. Flag. Flag. Not a flag. Flag. Crap.
不是國旗。國旗。國旗。不是國旗。是的。靠。
When stuff like this gets me down, you know what I like to do?
碰到這種讓我難受的事，你知道我都怎么做嗎？
Sing "Hakuna Matata" Like an eight-year-old girl?
像八歲小女孩一樣唱"哈庫那馬他他"嗎？
Wrong, smarty-pants. It's "Everything Is Awesome" From The Lego Movie.
錯了，自作聰明。該電影中的洗腦歡樂主題曲是《樂高大電影》里的"啥事兒都好贊"。
Look at these notebooks. They're full of pages and pages of data. He clearly spent years on this.
看這些筆記本，一頁一頁全都是數(shù)據(jù)。明顯是他多年的心血。
Oh, it's just columns of random numbers. Toss it.
只是一行行無規(guī)律的數(shù)字。扔了吧。
Well, but what if this was a potential breakthrough for him? What if...what if this is the thing that would've finally let him open that bottle of champagne?
萬一這是他可能的重要突破呢？萬一這是讓能他如愿以償打開那瓶香檳的東西呢？
Maybe he didn't know what to pair champagne with. Strawberries, caviar, oysters. All good choices.
或許他不開是因為不知道香檳要配什么。草莓 、魚子醬、 生蠔，都是好選擇。
Yeah, that look right there is why people eat before they come to your parties.
瞧你那表情，所以大家才會在參加你派對前先吃飽。
This has to mean something.
這些數(shù)據(jù)絕對是有意義的。
Well, there's no discernible pattern that I can see, but it shouldn't be too hard to run the numbers and check.
我沒能看出有什么規(guī)律啊，不過輸進電腦里驗證應(yīng)該是沒什么難度。
Well, maybe we can get some time on the supercomputer.
或許我們可以用超級計算機試試。
Sure. We could try multiple regressions with varying physical and experimental constants.
可以啊。我們試試用不同的物理常數(shù)與實驗常數(shù)進行多元回歸分析。
Oh, we could run a pattern-matching algorithm against well-known unsolved physics problems.
還可以用模式匹配算法將它們與知名未解物理問題做對比。
Ooh, it might be a substitution cipher. We could start with basic cryptanalysis.
甚至有可能是替換式密碼。我們可以從基本密碼分析著手。
Or we could talk to this guy he used to share an office with.
或者我們可以問以前跟他同一辦公室的人。
Oh, let's do that.
還是那樣做吧。
Because you don't know how to do cryptanalysis, do you?
因為你不知道怎么做密碼分析，對吧？
I'm not even sure if it's the right word.
我甚至不確定我說的詞對不對。
So, Dan, you have a grandson. How old is he? Seven.
丹，你有個孫子。他幾歲了？七歲。
Oh, yeah. I remember him from the picnic. He was the one crying like a wuss the whole time.
我記得他，在那次野餐有見過。一直哭個不停，像個娘娘腔似地。
I heard he was being picked on by a mean kid.
我聽說他是被一個小惡霸欺負了。
Just builds character. Like my dad said, "Nobody likes a crybaby except their mommies and Democrats."
有助人格發(fā)展啊。就像我爸說的 "沒人喜歡愛哭鬼，除了他們自己的媽還有民主黨。"
I need another drink. What's his problem?
失陪，我去加酒。他是有啥不滿？
I don't know. Maybe he didn't like the fact that you called his grandson a wuss.
不知道，可能他不喜歡聽到自己的孫子被你叫娘娘腔吧。
Well, I didn't think you were supposed to say "sissy" anymore.
可現(xiàn)在不是不讓叫別人"娘炮"嗎。
Okay, look, I know what a good person you are, but sometimes people think you might come off a little harsh.
我知道你這個人很好，可有時別人會覺得你表現(xiàn)得有點毒舌。
What? I'm, like, the sweetest person I know. Look at me. I should be in a tree baking cookies.
什么？我是我這輩子認識最甜的人了。甜得像樹里做小餅干的童話人物。
Yes, but once in a while, people think you're a little mean.
可是有些時候，有人會覺得你有點刻薄。
Oh, yeah? You one of those people? No. No, no, no. I I think the cookie thing.
是嗎？你是那些人中的一員嗎？不，不是。我也覺得你是做餅干那種。
Action.
開始。
Welcome back. Our guest today is a returning fan favorite.
歡迎回來。今日的來賓曾來過。
He puts the reading in your rainbow, the Geordi in your La Forge, and the Kunta in your Kinte, Mr. LeVar Burton.
并廣受觀眾喜歡：兒童閱讀節(jié)目《閱讀彩虹》的主持人、《星際迷航：下一代》成員、電視迷你劇集《根》的主角，萊瓦爾?伯頓先生。
Thank you, Sheldon. Now, remember our deal... You do this, I delete your contact information.
謝謝，謝爾頓。別忘了我們的約定...你來上節(jié)目，我刪了你的聯(lián)系方式。
While...While you watch me do it. Great. Happy to be back.
而且...而且是在你面前刪。很好。很高興再來上節(jié)目。
Well, since you're here, I'd like to get your opinion on something.
既然你來了，我想問你對某件事的看法。
In honor of Black History Month, I portrayed George Washington Carver in a loving tribute that my roommate called "wildly racist" What do you think?
為了向黑人歷史月致意，我扮成了喬治?華盛頓?卡弗。我對他的致敬被我室友說"超有種族歧視"，你覺得呢？
Hi. My name is George. Oh, hell, no!
你好，我的名字叫喬治。我去，不是吧！
You heard him, Leonard. No, it's not racist.
聽到了嗎，萊納德。"不是"吧，我沒有種族歧視。
