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Okay, yeah, my uncles are bald, but my Aunt Edna is one of the hairiest women you'll ever meet, so...Sweet lady. Always tickles when she hugs me.
好吧我的叔叔都是禿頭，不過我阿姨埃德娜將是你見過的頭發最茂盛的。挺和藹可親的。抱我的時候老是會癢癢。
What now? I have to make peepee.
又怎么了？我要尿尿。
Listen, I'm sorry about all of Sheldon's interruptions. He can be a bit of an eccentric.
聽著，謝爾頓老是來打擾，我為此抱歉，他的舉止是有點古怪。
If by "eccentric" you mean passiveaggressive East Texas blowhole, I agree.
要是你說的"舉止古怪"是指他表面看起來支持我們實際卻老在背地里搗亂我很同意。
I think tonight was a very good start.
我覺得今晚是個很不錯的開端。
Me, too. Are you sure you're okay postponing intercourse until our relationship is past the initial viability test?
我也是。在我們的關系通過"生存能力大考驗"之前你確定不和我發生關系？
No problem. I'm very skilled at postponing intercourse. I guess I'll call you and we'll arrange another evening.
沒問題，我對延遲交配很在行。我會再打給你的，哪天晚上再過來。
Yes, I believe protocol dictates that you wait a minimum of 18 hours before you call so I'm not repulsed by your cloying eagerness.
沒錯，根據約定你至少得在18個小時之后才打給我，不然我會對你如此猴急反感的。
Sure. Again, it's your decision. You're the man.
當然。再說一遍，這是你決定的，你是男人。
It wasn't my cat. It was an experiment designed by this guy named Schroedinger.
那不是我的貓，是一個叫薛定諤的家伙設計的實驗。
From the Charlie Brown cartoons?
查理布朗動畫里的人物？
No, he was some kind of scientist. Let me start again. Oh, hey, Leonard.
不他是個啥科學家的，我們從頭來過。 嘿蘭納德。
Hello. Leslie. hi. Okay, well, good night. Okay, well, good night. Call me. Right.
好啊。萊斯莉。你好。好吧晚安啦。好吧晚安啦。打給我哦。好。
Okay, good night. Uh, what? Had a great time. Ciao.
晚安 什么？今晚很高興再見。
I'm sorry, I am not going back to the renaissance fair.
對不起我可不想再去什么文藝復興節了。
Come on, Sheldon. There's so few places I can wear my jester costume.
行了謝爾頓，我還能穿小丑服去啥別的地方。
I don't care. There are far too many historical anomalies for my comfort.
我不管。這么多奇怪的人和物打著歷史的名號。
Okay, how about this? You can go dressed as a Star Trek science officer exploring a planet similar to Earth in the 1500s.
你看這樣如何？你可以打扮成星際迷航里的科學家，在十五世紀探索一個和地球類似的行星。
You mean, like Spock? Sure. Fascinating.
你是說像尖耳朵史波克那樣？沒錯。太棒了。
Hey, fellow scientists...Sheldon.
嘿科學家同事們。謝爾頓。
Why don't we all move over there so Leslie can join us? Yeah, let's do it.
我們不如坐那兒吧，這樣萊斯莉就能一起了。好，我們過去吧。
If you're having trouble deciding where to sit, may I suggest one potato, two potato? Or as I call it, the Leslie Winkle experimental methodology.
如果你不知道該坐哪兒，我建議你念"一個土豆兩個土豆"，或者按我的叫法，萊斯莉溫科的實驗方法論。
Don't make this hard for me. It's not hard. It's simple.
別讓我左右為難。這又不難，簡單得很。
You can either sit with me, your friend, colleague and roommate or you can sit with an overrated scientist you might have sex with.
你可以和我，你的朋友同事兼室友坐一起，或者你可以要睡的，被高估的科學家坐一起。
You're right, it is simple.
你說對了，這很簡單。
Hey, Sheldon. Penny. Third floor tonight mixing it up?
嘿謝爾頓。佩妮。今晚坐三樓，拌嘴升級了？
I still don't understand why you don't just go to dinner or something.
我還是不明白你為啥不去吃個飯之類的。
All right, let's say I go to dinner alone, and during the meal, I have to use the restroom.
好吧，就說我一個人去吃飯吧，在用餐期間我肯定得去洗手間。
How do I know someone is not touching my food?
我怎么知道別人沒碰過我的食物？
Good night, Sheldon.
晚安謝爾頓。
Penny, hold on. Are you sure things can't work out with you and Leonard?
佩妮等等，你肯定你和蘭納德沒可能了？
Excuse me? I'm just wondering if you really gave it the old college try.
什么？我只是想知道你會不會努力試試。
Or in your case, the old community college try. Okay, where is this coming from?
放在你身上就是去社區學院試試。干嘛要提起這個？
Leonard is upstairs right now with my archenemy. Your archenemy?
蘭納德和我的宿敵在樓上。你的宿敵？
Yes, the Dr. Doom to my Mr. Fantastic. Dr. Octopus to my SpiderMan, the Dr. Sivana to my Captain Marvel. I get it, I get it, I get it.
沒錯，就像毀滅博士對我的神奇先生，章魚博士對我的蜘蛛俠，西瓦納博士對我的神奇隊長。明白了明白了。
Do you know, it's amazing how many super villains have advanced degrees.
真是奇妙，這些超級大壞蛋都有很高的學歷。
Graduate school should probably do a better job of screening those people out.
研究生院該好好做做工作把他們篩選出去嘛。
Sheldon, come back. You're losing me.
謝爾頓快說正題，你把我弄暈了。
It's Leslie Winkle, Penny. She belittles my research.
佩妮我說的是萊斯莉溫可，她鄙視我的研究。
Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry. She called me "dumb ass." I know. I heard.
噢小可愛，我很抱歉。她叫我"傻蛋"。我知道，我聽見了。
Given this situation, I have no choice but to withdraw my previous objections to your illconsidered relationship with Leonard.
在這種情況下，我不得不收回之前對你和蘭納德欠考慮關系的反對。
Oh, gee, well, thank you for that. But I think for now, Leonard and I are just gonna stay friends.
噢，謝謝你這么做，不過就現在而言蘭納德和我還是做朋友比較好。
No, that response is unacceptable to me.
不行，這個回答我無法接受。
Sheldon, you are a smart guy. You must know... I'm "smart"? I'd have to lose 60 IQ points to be classified as "smart."
謝爾頓你是個聰明人，你得知道...我是聰明人？要被歸為聰明人我得去掉60點智商才行。
Are you gonna let me talk? I'm sorry.
你還讓不讓我說了？ 對不起。
You must know that if Leonard and Leslie want to be together, nothing you can do is gonna stop it.
你得知道要是蘭納德和萊斯莉要在一起的話你做什么都是阻止不了的。
You continue to underestimate my capabilities, madam.
小姐，你再次低估了我的能力。
Okay, let me put it this way. If you're really Leonard's friend, you will support him no matter who he wants to be with.
好這么說吧，如果你真是蘭納德的哥們，無論他和誰在一起你都會支持他的。
Wait a minute. Why am I doing all the giving here?
等一下，為什么都是我讓步？
If Leonard's really my friend, why doesn't he have to support me an my hatred of Leslie Winkle?
如果蘭納德真的是我的哥們他怎么就不支持一下我對萊斯莉溫可的厭惡之情？
Because love trumps hate. Oh, now you're just making stuff up. Okay, good night, Sheldon.
因為愛勝過厭惡。噢你可真會胡說。好吧，晚安了謝爾頓。
Oh, Mario, if only I could control everyone the way I control you. Hop, you little plumber, hop, hop, hop.
馬里奧，要是我能像控制你一樣控制他人該多好。跳啊，你個小水管工，跳跳跳。
When the two of you reach a natural stopping point, I'd like to have a word.
等你們自然地結束以后我有話要說。
The word is "peepee." Just do it.
如果你要說"尿尿"去就是了。
Leonard, you're my friend, and friends support their friends apparently.
蘭納德你是我朋友，朋友互相支持那是顯然的。
So I'm withdrawing my objection to your desire to have a relationship with Leslie.
所以我收回對你和萊斯莉交往的反對。
Thank you. I will graciously overlook the fact that she is an arrogant, subpar scientist who actually believes loop quantum gravity better unites quantum mechanics with generally relativity than does string theory.
謝謝。我會和藹地遠眺這位傲慢而不合格的，相信環量子引力更好地聯系起量子力學和廣義相對論而不是弦理論的科學家。
You kids have fun.
你們自娛自樂吧。
Hang on a second. Loop quantum gravity clearly offers more testable predictions than string theory.
等等，環量子引力明顯比弦理論提供了更多可證的預測。
I'm listening. Amuse me.
我在聽呢，逗我笑吧。
Okay, well, for one thing, we expect quantized spacetime to manifest itself as minute differences in the speed of light for different colors.
好，一方面來說我們期待量子化的時空能夠證明在光速下不同顏色的細小差異。
Balder dash. Matter clearly consists of tiny strings.
胡言亂語，物質顯然是由細小的弦組成的。
Are you gonna let him talk to me like that?
他這么同我說話你就坐視不理？
Okay, well, there is a lot of merit to both theories.
好吧，兩種理論各有各的優勢。
No, there isn't. Only loop quantum gravity calculates the entropy of black holes.
不是這樣的，只有環量子引力能算出黑洞的熵值。
Sheldon, don't make that noise. It's disrespectful.
謝爾頓別發出那種聲音，太不尊重人了。
I should hope so. It was a snort of derision.
我正是這么想的。那是嘲笑的鼻音。
You agree with me, right? Loop quantum gravity is the future of physics.
你同意我的對吧？環量子引力是物理學的未來。
Sorry, Leslie, I guess I prefer my space stringy, not loopy.
抱歉萊斯莉我比較同意弦理論而不是環理論。
I'm glad I found out the truth about you before this went any further.
我很高興能在我們的關系有進展前看到了真相。
Truth? What truth? We're talking about untested hypotheses. It's no big deal.
真相？什么真相？我們在討論未經證實的假說，有什么大不了的。
It isn't? Really? Tell me, Leonard, how will we raise the children?
真的沒什么大不了的？蘭納德告訴我，我們怎么教育我們的孩子。
I guess we wait until they're old enough and let them choose their own theory.
我猜我們會等他們長大了自己選吧。
We can't let them choose, Leonard. They're children! Wait. Where are you going?
怎么能讓他們自己選，他們是孩子！等等你上哪兒去？
I'm sorry. I could have accepted our kids being genetically unable to eat ice cream or ever get a good view of a parade.
對不起，就遺傳角度而言，我們的孩子不能吃冷飲也沒法在游行時看得更遠，這些我還都能接受。
But this? This is a deal breaker.
但是這個？這是原則問題。
Look on the bright side. What's the bright side? Only nine more months to Comiccon. Oh, yeah.
要看到好的一面。哪有好的一面？離動漫展只有九個月了。噢是啊。
Captain, I'm getting an unusual reading.
隊長，發現異常情況。
Yeah, that's great. You guys want a corn dog?
那很好啊。你們要來根玉米腸么？
Yeah. That's a temporal anomaly. Corn dog's didn't come into existence till the first half of the 20th century.
好啊，時間異常，玉米腸是二十世紀中葉才出現的。
