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Worst Renaissance Fair Ever. Please let it go, Sheldon.
史上最爛文藝復興節(jié)集會。別墨跡了謝爾頓。
It was rife with historical inaccuracies. For example, the tavern girl serving flagons of mead.
到處充斥著歷史錯誤，比如小酒館的女服務生賣給我們一大肚壺的蜂蜜酒。
Her costume was obviously Germanic. But in 1487, the Bavarian purity laws, or "Reinheitsgebot, " severely limited the availability of mead.
她的裝束明顯是日爾曼式的，但在1487年巴伐利亞釀酒法或曰"純度法令"嚴格限制加制蜂蜜酒。
At best, they would have had some sort of spiced wine. You're nitpicking.
最多只準加點葡萄酒。你是雞蛋里挑骨頭。
Oh, really? Well, here's another nit for you: the flagons would not have been made of polypropylene.
哦是么？再告訴你個錯誤，大肚酒壺絕不是聚丙烯做的。
Renaissance fairs aren't about historical accuracy.
文藝復興節(jié)關注的不是歷史準確性。
They're about taking chubby girls who work at Kinko's and lacing them up in corsets so tight their bosom jumps out and says, "Howdy."
而是讓那些在金考公司上班的豐滿女孩系上緊身胸衣好讓她們的乳房快跳脫出來和我們說您好。
Bosoms would not have said "howdy" in the 15th century. If anything, they would've said, "Huzzah."
15世紀的大胸女人可不會說您好，說的話也該是萬歲。
I don't care what the bosoms say, Sheldon. I just want to be part of the conversation.
我不在乎大胸女人說什么謝爾頓，我只想和她們搭上話。
Hi, guys. Looks like you've been to the renaissance fair. I'm hoping.
嗨伙計們，看來你們?nèi)⒓恿宋乃噺团d節(jié)集會。我希望是。
Renaissance fair? More of a medieval, slash, Age of Enlightenment, slash, any excuse to wear a codpiece fair.
文藝復興節(jié)？不過是個中世紀兼啟蒙時代兼找借口穿遮蔭布的集會。
Okay, fine, whatever. You guys, this is my friend Eric. So, yeah, good to see you.
好吧隨意啦。伙計們這是我朋友埃里克。嗯，很高興見到你。
Yeah. Yeah. It's good to see you, too. We should probably go. Bye, guys.
是啊我也很高興見到你。我們該走了，拜伙計們。
I like your hat. Thanks, my mom made it.
我喜歡你的帽子。謝了，我媽做的。
Penny with a new guy, tres awkward. It wasn't awkward. It wasn't fun.
佩妮帶了個新朋友，非常尷尬。沒什么尷尬。也不好玩。
Besides, what's the big deal? We dated, we stopped dating, and now we're both moving on.
再說有啥大不了的？我們約會過，然后不約會了，現(xiàn)在我們都朝前看了。
By moving on, do you mean she's going out with other men and you spent the afternoon making 15th century soap with Wolowitz?
你指的朝前看是她和另個男的出去約會，而你花一下午和沃勒威茨一起做15世紀的肥皂？
That was not 15th century soap. My God, those people need to learn you can't just put "ye olde" in front of anything you want and expect to get away with it.
那才不是15世紀的肥皂，天啊，這些人應該知道不能什么都胡亂加上前綴"ye olde"就指望僥幸蒙混過關。
Can we please just go in? My chain mail's stuck in my underwear.
我們能快點進去嗎？我的鎖子甲和我內(nèi)褲粘一起了。
You're wearing modern underwear?
你穿著現(xiàn)代人的內(nèi)褲？
Relatively modern. Why, what are you wearing?
相對比較現(xiàn)代。怎么了，你穿的什么？
I fashioned historically accurate undergarments out of linen.
我精確地遵照歷史穿了亞麻內(nèi)衣。
You went out and bought linen?
你還出去買了亞麻布？
Don't be silly, I borrowed one of your pillowcases. Borrowed?
別傻了，我從你的枕套里借了一塊。借？
You know, I'm happy to see Penny is moving on. It gives me the freedom to move on myself.
我很高興看到佩妮釋懷了，這給了我自己朝前看的自由。
Are you saying that you've been holding back? Of course. Out of respect.
你是說你之前在原地躊躇？當然，出于尊重嘛。
So, how do you explain the ten years before Penny?
那你怎么解釋遇見佩妮前的十年？
Who were you respecting then?
那時你是為了尊重誰？
Well, I've dated plenty of women. There was Joyce Kim, Leslie Winkle...
我和許多女生交往過，喬伊斯·金，還有萊斯莉·溫科...
Notify the editors of the Oxford English Dictionary. The word "plenty" has been redefined to mean "two."
通知牛津英語詞典的編輯們，"許多"現(xiàn)在被重新定義為"兩個"
What about that girl last year at ComicCon? Doesn't count. Why not?
那去年動漫展上的女生呢？不算。為什么？
What happens in costume at ComicCon stays at ComicCon.
穿著戲服在動漫展上發(fā)生的故事只限于動漫展。
You're only saying that because of what happened to you. What happened to you? Nothing happened to me.
你這么說只因為發(fā)生在你身上的事。你發(fā)生了什么事？我沒什么事。
It wasn't your fault, Raj. He was dressed as a green Orion slave girl.
不是你的錯Raj，他把自己打扮成綠色獵戶座女仆。
How did we get on me? We were mocking Leonard for not moving on. Dude, you have totally not moved on.
怎么說到我頭上了？我們在嘲笑蘭納德原地躊躇。老兄，你完全是在原地徘徊。
Yes, I have. It's just a matter of actually making a date with someone. Like who?
是這樣，不過就是個和誰定個具體約會的問題唄。比如和誰？
Well... there's Joyce Kim. But she defected back to North Korea, so that's a little geographically undesirable.
呃，不有喬伊斯·金嘛。但她叛逃回朝鮮了，所以有點地域上的不適宜。
What about Leslie Winkle? Oh, no.
那萊斯莉·溫科呢？哦不。
Why? Her research methodology is sloppy, she's unjustifiably arrogant about loop quantum gravity, and to make matters worse, she's often mean to me.
怎么了？她的研究方法漏洞百出，在說圈量子引力理論時盲目自大，更糟的是她對我刻薄得要命。
I think she's smoking hot. I'd hit that.
我覺得她辣得冒煙啊。同意。
You'd hit particulate soil in a colloidal suspension. Mud.
你覺得膠狀懸浮體土上的微粒也很辣。 就是泥唄。
Look, I like Leslie, but she's not interested in dating as much as using men as tools for stress release.
我喜歡萊斯莉，但她對約會沒興趣，她不過是把男人作釋放壓力的工具。
Yeah, so? Be a tool. Go get yourself a little rebound "stress release."
是嗎，那又怎樣？作工具好了。你也可以給自己緩解一下壓力。
Technically, it would only be rebound if he and Penny had actually engaged in physical intimacy.
嚴格講他只有和佩妮有身體親密行為才能有后備女友一說。
You mean like you and Richard the slave girl?
你是說你和理查德那個女仆那樣的？
I bought him dinner and we kissed once! That was it. And he told me his name was Kimberly.
我給他買了晚餐然后接吻一次僅此而已。然后他告訴我他叫金百利。
You know how I know we're not in the matrix? How?
知道我如何認識到我們不在母體嗎？如何？
If we were, the food would be better.
如果那樣，食物會好很多。
Hey, Leonard. Hey, Leslie. Hey, dummy.
嘿蘭納德。嘿萊斯莉。嘿小傻瓜。
Hello, to you, insufficiently intelligent person.
嗨是你啊，智商不夠的人。
Ooh, rush me to the burn unit.
哇趕緊送我去燒傷科。
Hey, Leonard, do you have a second? I need to ask you something. Sure.
嘿蘭納德你有空嗎？我要問你些事。當然。
Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go do work that promises significant results, as opposed to what you do, which does not. Yeah, you heard me.
失陪了，我要作些成績斐然的工作，與你做的那些，沒有意義。沒錯，說你呢。
So, I heard your relationship with Penny crashed to the ground like blue ice falling out of an airplane lavatory.
我聽說你和佩妮吹了，就像從飛機馬桶里扔出的藍冰一樣。
Where did you hear that?
你從哪兒聽說的？
Actually, I read it. Wolowitz texted me.
實際上我讀到的。沃勒威茨發(fā)短信給我了。
Like blue ice falling out of an airplane lavatory, yeah.
就像從飛機馬桶里蹦出的藍冰，是啊。
I thought it was a pretty good one. I gave him an LOL.
我覺得是條不錯的短信，所以回復他笑臉。
Anyway, it got me thinking. Now that you're unattached, maybe we can revisit our previous attachment.
總之我就在想既然你又單身了，也許我們能重溫過去的情結(jié)。
Are you suggesting another bout of stress release?
你是建議再來一次釋放壓力的較量？
No, I'm all done with casual sex. From now on, I'm fully committed to the traditional relationship paradigm.
不我已經(jīng)厭煩逢場作性了，從現(xiàn)在起我完全忠于傳統(tǒng)交往關系的模式。
Really? What changed?
真的嗎？ 有什么不同？
It's hard to say. I guess there's just a time in every woman's life when she gets tired of waking up on a strange futon with a bunch of people she doesn't know.
很難說，我想每個女人的一生中都會有段時間厭倦了在陌生的床墊上醒來發(fā)現(xiàn)身邊一群不認識的人。
Yeah, I can see how that woulda bunch of people?
嗯我能理解，一群人？
Anyway, I figure it's time to slow things down and who better to slow things down with than you?
總之我想是時候要慢慢來，而誰比你更適合慢慢來呢？
I'm flattered. So how do you suggest we proceed?
承蒙夸獎。那你建議我們怎么進行呢？
Your place, we'll order Chinese, you'll rent a movie artsy, but accessiblethen light petting, no coitus. Sounds fun.
去你家，我們點些中國菜，租部電影，藝術點的，但要易理解，然后輕柔撫摸，沒有性交。聽起來很有趣。
I'll leave the details up to you. I think it's better if you assume the male role.
細節(jié)由你來定，我想如果你扮演男性角色這樣好些。
Thank you, that's very thoughtful. Great. Call me.
謝謝你，很體貼。好極了，打電話給我。
Great news. My mom sent me my old Nintendo 64. Terrific.
好消息，我媽給我寄來我原來的任天堂64。好耶。
You know what this means, don't you? Break out the Red Bull, it's time to rock Mario, old school.
你知道這意味著什么吧？紅牛那關打通后超級瑪麗就差不多通關了，懷念昔日校園生活啊。
I kind of have other plans tonight.
我今晚另有安排。
But it's Friday. Friday is always vintage game night. Look, Mom included the memory card.
但今天是周五，周五總是古董游戲之夜啊，瞧媽媽還寄了存儲卡，
We can pick up right where I left off in 1999 when I had pernicious anemia.
我們可以剛好從1999年我得惡性貧血暫停那會兒接著玩。
Well, the thing is, someone is coming over.
問題是有人要過來。
Okay, no problem. I have three controllers. The more the merrier.
好的沒問題，我有三個手柄，人越多越開心。
Sheldon, it's a date. I have a date coming over.
謝爾頓這是約會，我的約會對象要過來。
Oh, you can't blame me for not jumping to that conclusion.
不要怪我猜不到這是怎么回事。
Why? What's so unusual about me having a date? Well, statistically speaking... All right, all right.
為什么？ 我有約會就這么不尋常？從統(tǒng)計學上講... 好了好了。
Well, nevertheless, I have one now and I'd appreciate it if you would, you know, make yourself scarce.
不過我現(xiàn)在有對象了，如果你能回避我不勝感激。
Leonard, I'm a published theoretical physicist with two doctorates and an IQ which can't be accurately measured by normal tests.
蘭納德我是擁有2個博士頭銜發(fā)表過理論的物理學家并且智商高到無法用普通測試測出。
How much scarcer could I be?
我還不夠稀有嗎？
You know what I mean. Could you just give us a little privacy?
你明白我的意思，你不能給我們一點私人空間嗎？
You want me to leave the apartment? Yes.
你要我離開公寓？是的。
You mean, just go someplace else and be...someplace else? Yes.
你是說去別的地方...別的地方？是的。
Well, why should I leave? This is my apartment, too.
為什么我要離開？這也是我的公寓。
I know it is, and if science ever discovers a second member of your species and you two would like some privacy, I'd be more than happy to get out of your way.
我知道，如果科學領域發(fā)現(xiàn)第二個像你這樣的人類，你倆想要獨處我很樂意為你們回避。
Well, all right then.
那好吧。
Sheldon, what are you doing?
謝爾頓你在干嘛？
Playing Super Mario on a poorly coded Nintendo 64 emulator.
在編碼不佳的任天堂64模擬器上玩超級瑪麗。
Yeah, but why are you doing it on the stairs?
但你干嘛坐樓梯上玩？
I am a modern day Napoleon exiled to the Elba of the staircase because Leonard, get this, has a date.
我是現(xiàn)代版的拿破侖被放逐到樓梯版的厄爾巴島，因為蘭納德，注意，在約會。
Oh, well, good for him. Yeah, but why are you sitting here? Why don't you just go to a movie or something? Alone?
好，他不錯嘛。嗯但你為什么坐這兒？干嘛不去看電影啥的？一個人？
Yeah, why not? What if I choke on my popcorn? Who will administer the Heimlich maneuver?
是啊為什么不？要是我被爆米花噎住了呢？誰來做海姆利克氏操作法？
Well, then don't order popcorn. No popcorn at the mov... listen to yourself.
那就別買爆米花唄。看電影不買爆米花，瞧你說的。
Why don't you go to a cfee shop? I don't drink coffee. They have other things.
那去咖啡店如何？我不喝咖啡。他們還有別的東西。
What do they have? I don't know. You know, cookies, pastries...Pastries such as bear claws?
還有什么？不清楚，大概有餅干油酥面團...熊爪糕之類的？
Yeah, sure. I don't like bear claws.
沒錯。我不喜歡吃熊爪糕。
Hey, Penny. Dumb ass.
嘿佩妮。傻蛋。
Leslie Winkle. Of all the overrated physicists in all the labs in all the world, why does it have to be Leslie Winkle?
萊斯莉·溫科。這世上有這么多被高估的物理學家，為什么非得是萊斯莉·溫科？
Well, they have a lot in common. I mean, they're both scientists.
嗯... 他們有許多共同之處，我是說他們都是科學家。
Oh, please. The only way she could make a contribution to science would be if they resumed sending chimps into space.
得了吧，要是他們重新送猩猩上太空，她倒是還有可能為科學做貢獻。
Okay, well, I have a date, too, so I'll see ya.
好吧我也有約會，回見啦。
Everybody has a date. Even you, Mario, going after Princess Peach. And what am I doing? I'm just enabling you.
大家都有約會，連你馬里奧都在追求桃子公主。而我在做啥？ 不過是操縱你追她罷了。
This is pretty good orange chicken. Yeah, it's from Chang's.
這陳皮雞味道真不賴。沒錯去陳記買的嘛。
Not Chow's? No, Chang's. What happened to Chow's? It changed.
不是周記？ 不 是陳記。周記是怎么了？ 它變了。
So, how many children do you think we should have?
那么，我們該生幾個小孩？
I'm sorry. That was a little abrupt. A little?
抱歉，有點唐突了。只是有點？
I mean, there are so many things to talk about before we discuss reproduction. I sure hope so.
我是說在我們討論繁衍后代之前還有好多事要談呢。當然我希望如此。
Besides shortness, what genetic weaknesses run in your family?
除了矮小你家還有啥基因缺陷？
Sorry to interrupt. Battery is dying. Continue.
抱歉打擾了，沒電了你們繼續(xù)。
Uh, genetic weakness, right. Uh, there's the lactose intolerance.
呃... 基因缺陷，有了，我有乳糖不耐癥。
Don't forget the malepattern baldness. When his uncles sit around the dinner table, they look like a half carton of eggs.
別忘了還有男性型禿頂，他的叔叔們圍坐餐桌前的情形就像是看到了半箱雞蛋一樣。
