評論
打印
Joey:"Heckles, you crack me up in science class. You're the funniest kid in school."
“哈克，你上科學課總是讓我捧腹大笑。”，“你是全校最有趣的學生。”
Chandler: Funniest? Heckles?
最有趣？哈克？
Joey: That's what it says.
上面是這樣寫的。
Chandler: Wow, Heckles was voted class clown, and so was I.He was right. Would you listen to that?
哈克被選為班上的活寶，我也是他說得對！聽聽那個噪音？
Phoebe: I'd call that excessive.
我會覺得的確是很吵鬧。
Chandler: Whoa!
什么？
Joey: What?
怎么了？
Chandler: Heckles played clarinet in band, and I played clarinet. And he was in the scale modeler's club, and I was, well, there was no club, but I sure thought they were cool.
哈克在樂隊演奏豎笛，我也是。他參加模型俱樂部，我也…雖然我的學校沒有俱樂部，但我覺得模型很酷。
Joey: So, you were both dorks. Big deal.
所以你們兩個都是書呆子，沒什么值得大驚小怪。
Chandler: I just think it's weird, you know? Heckles and me, Heckles, and me, me, me and Heckles...Hey, would you knock it off?
我覺得很怪，哈克與我…哈克與我，我…我與哈克。喂，別吵好不好！
Chandler: Bah!
嘣！
Joey: Have you been here all night?
你整晚都在這里？
Chandler: Look at this. Pictures of all the women that Heckles went out with. Look what he wrote on them.
看看這個，哈克交往過的女人照片。看看他在上面寫的。
Chandler: Vivian, too tall. Madge, big gums. Too loud, too smart, makes noise when she eats. This is, this is me. This is what I do. I'm gonna end up alone, just like he did.
“薇安，太高大”，“瑪姬，牙齦太大”，“太大聲”，“太聰明”，“吃東西發出聲音”這就是我。這就是我的作法，我會像他一樣孤獨終老。
Joey: Chandler, Heckles was a nutcase.
哈克是個神經病。
Chandler: Our trains are on the same track, ok? Yeah, sure, I'm coming up 30 years behind him, but the stops are all the same. Bitter Town. Aloneville. Hermit Junction.
我們的思考方式一樣。我比他晚了30年，但每一站都是一樣愁苦城…孤獨鎮，隱士村！
Joey: All right, you know what we gotta do? We gotta get you outta here. Come on, I'll buy you breakfast, let's go.
你知道我們該怎么辦么？我們應該離開這里，我請你吃早餐。
Chandler: What if I never find somebody? Or even worse, what if I've found her, but I dumped her because she pronounced it 'supposebly?'
要是我一直找不到伴侶怎么辦？或更糟的，我已經找到了…但我卻因為她把“或許”說成“厚許”就甩了她？
Joey: Chandler, come on, you're gonna find somebody.
錢德，好啦，你會找到對象的。
Chandler: How do you know that? How?
你怎么知道？怎么找？
Joey: I don't know, I'm just trying to help you out.
我不知道，我只是想幫你下臺。
Chandler: You'll see, you guys are all gonna go off and get married, and I'm gonna end up alone.
你們將來都會結婚…我會孤獨一人。
Chandler: Will you promise me something? When you're married, will you invite me over for holidays?
你能不能答應我一件事？你結婚后，過節時能不能請我去玩？
Joey: Well, I don't know. I don't know what we're gonna be doing. I mean, what if we're over her folks' place?
我不知道，我們會怎么樣。要是我們到她的父母那里過節呢？
Chandler: Yeah, I understand.
好吧，我了解。
Joey: You can come over and watch the Super Bowl. Every year, all right?
你可以過來看超級杯，每一年都來，怎么樣？
Chandler: You know what? I'm not gonna end up like this. I'll see you man.
我不要像這樣子下場！待會見，兄弟。
Joey: Supposebly. Supposebly. Did they go to the zoo? Supposebly.
“厚許”…“厚許”！他們去動物園了嗎？“厚許”吧…
Chandler: Hi, it's me.
嗨，是我。
Janice: Oh, my, God.
我的天！
Phoebe: Janice? You called Janice?
珍妮絲？你打給珍妮絲？
Chandler: Yes, Janice. Why is that so difficult for you to comprehend?
是的，珍妮絲有什么難懂的？
Ross: You remember Janice, right?
你還記得珍妮絲吧？
Chandler: Yes. She was smart, she was pretty, and she honestly cared about me. Janice is my last chance to have somebody.
是啊，她很聰明，很漂亮，而且很關心我。珍妮絲是我的最后一個希望。
Janice: Helloo! !
你好！
Chandler: Oh...my...God!
喔，天啊！
Joey: Geez, look how fat she got.
她真是胖了不少。
Janice: Hey, it's everybody.
嗨，大家都在這里！
ALL: Hi, Janice.
嗨，珍妮絲。
Chandler: Janice, you're...
珍妮絲，你…
Janice: Yes, I am.
是的，我有了。
Chandler: Is it...
是不是…
Janice: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married lady now.
是不是你的？沒那么好的事，錢德賓！我已經是已婚女士了。
Everyone: Oh, yeah.
太好了。
Chandler: Congratulations.
恭喜。
Janice: Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry. I couldn't wait for you forever.
親愛的，真抱歉，我不可能等你一輩子。
Chandler: You couldn't've told me about this over the phone?
你不能在電話上告訴我嗎？
Janice: And what? Missed the expression on your face? Oh no, Janice likes to have her fun.
要我錯過看到你的表情？才不要！珍妮絲喜歡樂子！
Monica: Hey, Rach. You know what we haven't played in a while? - Rachel: What?
你知道我們很久沒玩什么嗎？-什么？
Monica: Hide the Lamp.
藏起臺燈。
Rachel: Monica, let it go.
莫妮卡，算了吧。
Monica: Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?
你知道我對貝類過敏嗎？
Rachel: Well, then, you'll just have to eat the other lamps.
看來你只能吃其他臺燈了。
Phoebe: Uh-oh. It's Scary Scientist Man.
可怕的科學家來了。
Ross: Ok, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. A briefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.
菲比，這些就是了。在這個手提箱中，我帶來了真正的科學證據，可算是一提箱的證據。其中有些化石超過2億年。
PHOEBE: Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.
我要先告訴你，我并不否定進化論，進化論只是可能性之一。
Ross: It's the only possibility, Phoebe.
進化論是唯一的可能。
Phoebe: Ok, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, ok? Now, wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the Earth was flat?
羅斯，你能不能稍稍敞開心胸？以前最聰明的人，不也相信地球是平的？
Phoebe: And, up until like what, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this like, whole mess of crap came out.
五十年前，科學家認為，原子是最微小的事物。后來科學家擊碎了原子，于是產生了各種玩意…
Phoebe: Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?
難道你是如此自大…無法承認有一點點的可能…你們科學家也許會犯錯？
Ross: There might be...a teeny...tiny...possibility.
是有一點點…一點點…非常一點點…的可能。
Phoebe: I can't believe you caved.
我真不相信你屈服了。
Ross: What?
什么？
Phoebe: You just abandoned your whole belief system. Now I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you.
你放棄了你的整個信仰！以前我雖然不同意你，但我至少尊敬你。
Phoebe: How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Ah! Oh!
但是…明天你要怎么去上班？你要如何面對其他科學家？你要如何面對你自己？
Phoebe: That was fun. So who's hungry?
真好玩，有誰餓了？
Rachel: I am. Let me just get my coat.
我餓了，我去拿外套。
Rachel: Aw!
噢！
Monica: Ok, all right. It was an accident, I swear, all right. I was, I was putting on my jacket, and the-the thing, and the-the lamp, and it broke.
怎么了？這是意外，我發誓我正在穿外套，臺燈就破了。
Rachel: Oh, please, Monica. You've always hated my lamp, and now, all of a sudden, it's just magically broken?
拜托，莫妮卡！你一直討厭我的臺燈！然后突然間，它就奇跡似地破了？
Monica: Phoebe, tell her!
菲比，告訴她！
Phoebe: Ok, I didn't see it, 'cause I was putting on my jacket, but uh I want to believe you.
我沒看到，因為我正在穿外套，但我想要相信你。
Rachel: Hey Chandler. Monica just broke my seashell lamp.
嗨，錢德。莫妮卡打破了我的貝殼臺燈。
Chandler: Neat. I'm gonna die alone.
真好，我會死得孤苦伶仃！
Rachel: Ok, you win.
好，算你贏。
Monica: Chandler, you're not gonna die alone.
錢德，你不會死得孤苦伶仃。
Chandler: Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.
珍妮絲是我的安全網，現在我必須去養一條蛇了。
Phoebe: Uh huh. Why is that?
為什么？
Chandler: If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face.
如果我會成為孤獨老人，我需要養個東西，有個依靠，就像地鐵上那個吃自己臉的人。
Chandler: So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with a Snake, you know. Crazy Snake Man.
我會成為，“養蛇的瘋老頭”養蛇瘋子。
Chandler: And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'll shout!
然后我會養更多蛇，當成我的子女小孩都不敢經過我的門口！他們會叫道：離養蛇瘋子遠點！
Monica: You've got to get over this. Ok? You're-you're not gonna end up alone.
你必須想開一點，你不會孤苦伶仃。
Chandler: Of course I am. I reject anyone who's crazy enough to actually go out with me, and then I bitch about the fact that there aren't any great women out there.
我當然會。我甩掉了所有瘋狂得愿意跟我交往的女孩，然后我抱怨找不到好女孩。
Rachel: Chandler, you have just described virtually every man that we have ever gone out with.
我們所交往的男人…就跟你所描述的一樣。
Phoebe: Yeah.
是啊。
Monica: You are not a freak. You're a guy.
你沒什么問題，你只是個正常男人。
Rachel: Yeah, honey, she's right. I mean you all do it. This-this one guy stopped seeing me because, because his cat didn't like me.
她說得對，你們做的都一樣。有個人不再看我，是因為他的貓不喜歡我。
Phoebe: Or, this guy dumped me because I fell asleep during Spinal Tap.
這家伙甩我或者是因為我在腰椎穿刺的時候睡著。
Chandler: You fell asleep during Spinal Tap?
你在腰椎穿刺的時候睡著？
Rachel: Oh oh that Teddy, what's his name, in high school he stopped seeing you because he thought you were too fat.
泰迪不再看你是因為你太胖了。
Monica: He told me it was because he didn't have time for me because of the play.
他說他沒空，是因為要看球賽。
Rachel: Yeah, that's what I said. Anyway my point being, you are no different than the rest of them.
這就是我說的，我的意思是，你與其他人沒什么不同。
Monica: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes he is. Yeah, you are totally different.
等一下，等一下。他是不一樣，你其實很不一樣。
Chandler: In a bad way?
很糟糕嗎？
Monica: No, honey, in a wonderful way. You know what you want now. Most guys don't even have a clue. You are ready to take risks, you are ready to be vulnerable, and intimate with someone.
不，親愛的，是很好的不一樣。現在你知道你要什么了，大多數男人根本不知道。你準備好接受風險了，準備好接受傷害，與人親近。
Rachel: Yeah. You're not gonna end up alone.
你不會孤苦伶仃的。
Phoebe: Chandler, you called Janice! That's how much you wanted to be with someone!
你打電話給珍妮絲，這證明你希望與人廝守終生！
Monica: You made it!
你已經改變了！
Phoebe: You're there!
你不一樣了！
Rachel: You are ready to make a commitment!
你準備好做出承諾了！
Chandler: Whoa! Don't know about that.
但是我自己卻不知道！
Rachel: What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
你拿了什么？不是你的東西，而你想要打破？
Monica: No. Um, I know you like this, and I-I want you to have it. I think it'll look good in our apartment.
我知道你喜歡這個，我也要你收下它，在我們公寓會很好看。
Rachel: Thank you.
謝謝。
Monica: That's fine.
沒關系。
Chandler: Hey. Well, you will all be pleased to know that I have a date tomorrow night. This woman Alison, from work, she is great. She's pretty. She's smart.
你們會很高興知道，明天晚上我有約會。我的同事愛莉森，人很不錯。她又漂亮又聰明。
Chandler: And uh, I've been holding off on asking her out in the past, because she has a, an unusually large head. But, I'm not gonna let that stuff hang me up anymore. Look at me. I'm growing.
我一直…沒有約她出來，因為她有一個…不尋常的大頭！但我不要讓這種事情阻止我。看看我，我成熟了。
Joey: Hey, uh, you can't recycle yearbooks, can you?
同學錄不能廢物回收對吧？
Chandler: I'll take that.
我收了。
Joey: You want his yearbook?
你要他的同學錄？
Chandler: Yeah, yeah. Some people said some nice things about him. I think somebody should have it.
有人說了他的好話，應該留下來。
Monica: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone.
這真的很奇怪，他整個生命都在這公寓度過，現在人去樓空。
Monica: You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person.
我想我們應該為，哈克先生默哀一會兒。他是個麻煩人物，但他是個人。
Monica: You're all going to hell.
你們全都會下地獄。
Rachel: It's really not that big!
其實沒有那么大！
Chandler: Taking that with you, huh?
你要拿那個走？
Joey: Oh, yeah.
沒錯。
Ross: Hey, you coming?
你來嗎？
Chandler: Yeah, just a second.
等一下。
Chandler: Goodbye Mr. Heckles.
再見，哈克先生。
Chandler: We'll try to keep it down.
我們會安靜點。
Allison: Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in the classifieds and see "Philosopher wanted?"
我完全學非所用，報紙上什么時候看的到“征求哲學家”？
Chandler: Sure. My God, that's a big head! It didn't look this big in the office. Maybe it's the lighting.
對啊。天啊，那真是個大頭！在辦公室看起來沒這么大，也許是因為燈光。
Chandler: My head must look like a golf ball at work. All right, don't get hung up on it, quick, quick, list five things you like about her: Nice smile, good dresser...Big head, big head, big head!
我的頭在公司，一定像個高爾夫球那么小。不要想了，快列出你喜歡她的五件事。笑容很美，衣著高雅，大頭，大頭，還是大頭！
