口譯講評(píng) Interpretation Comments
1.“特別是奧運(yùn)會(huì)會(huì)徽,不僅是 而且體現(xiàn)了 ,體現(xiàn)了 奧運(yùn)會(huì)舉辦國(guó)家的民族性 格和精神風(fēng)貌”漢語(yǔ)中多用動(dòng)詞,而英語(yǔ)中多用名詞。因此,在漢譯英時(shí)動(dòng)詞可以適當(dāng)?shù)剞D(zhuǎn)化為名詞。這句話中“體現(xiàn)了”可以轉(zhuǎn)化為英語(yǔ)中的名詞性短語(yǔ)“a demonstration of”,這樣與前一句的結(jié)構(gòu)“an important representation of”(是重要載體)相對(duì)應(yīng),聽起來(lái)更連貫、自然。該句可譯為 “The emblem of the Olympic Games,in particular, is not only an important representation of the Olympic Movement and the Olympic brand, but also a demonstration of the charm of the host city’s unique culture and its national character and spirit”。
2.“創(chuàng)造出具有東方智慧、中國(guó)特色和北京特征的奧運(yùn)會(huì)形象與景觀,展示巨大魅力,體現(xiàn)綠色奧運(yùn),這是國(guó)際奧委會(huì)和國(guó)際社會(huì)對(duì)我們的共同期待。”漢英兩種語(yǔ)言在結(jié)構(gòu) 安排上有區(qū)別。漢語(yǔ)句法結(jié)構(gòu)強(qiáng)調(diào)前端重量,而英語(yǔ)則講究尾端重量,也就是說句子的結(jié)尾部分不宜太短,應(yīng)有一定長(zhǎng)度。根據(jù)這一規(guī)律,該句在譯成英語(yǔ)時(shí)應(yīng)調(diào)整結(jié)構(gòu)順序,將“這是 的共同期望”放在句首,同時(shí) 由于前面的信息太長(zhǎng),在譯成英語(yǔ)時(shí),可在“體現(xiàn)”前面斷開,拆譯為兩個(gè)獨(dú)立的句子,同時(shí)添加詞使句子的前后意思連貫。該句可譯為:“It is the IOC and international community’s expectation that we create an Olympic image that reflects oriental wisdom and characteristics of both Beijing and China, as well as China’s long history, splendid culture and the fascination of the Beijing Games. The image is also expected to be a manifestation of the concepts of Green Olympics, High-tech Olympics and People’s Olympics -- thus leaving a unique legacy to the Olympic Movement.”
3.“為創(chuàng)造一個(gè)獨(dú)特、精致、內(nèi)涵豐富、形象生動(dòng)的奧運(yùn)會(huì)會(huì)徽,北京奧組委面向全球征集北京奧運(yùn)會(huì)會(huì)徽設(shè)計(jì)作品,//得到了海內(nèi)外專業(yè)設(shè)計(jì)機(jī)構(gòu)和專家的廣泛參與。”這句話如果直譯為 “ , BOCOG solicited emblem designs worldwide, and got the extensive participation of the domestic and international professional designing institutions and experts”,聽起來(lái)邏輯不清楚,好像成了“海內(nèi)外專業(yè)設(shè)計(jì)機(jī)構(gòu)和專家廣泛參與北京奧組委”,而實(shí)際上是“參與北京奧組委組織的競(jìng)賽”,因此這樣的譯法含義不明確,我們不妨采用斷句的譯法,將這個(gè)長(zhǎng)句拆分成兩個(gè)獨(dú)立的句子。斷句后,后面一句沒有主語(yǔ),我們可以漢語(yǔ)中的“海內(nèi)外專業(yè)設(shè)計(jì)機(jī)構(gòu)和專家”作為英語(yǔ)中的主語(yǔ)。所以該句可譯為“In order to create a unique, meaningful, symbolic and animated emblem for Beijing Olympic Games, BOCOG solicited emblem designs worldwide. Many domestic and international professional designing institutions and experts were invited to participate in the competition.”
4.“所有作品都充分體現(xiàn)了中國(guó)文化的特色,并力求對(duì)奧林匹克理念和精神做了深入發(fā)掘。”英語(yǔ)中有“異敘”(syllepsis)的修辭手段,即用一個(gè)詞(動(dòng)詞、形容詞或介詞)同時(shí)與兩個(gè)詞(或更多)相搭配。該句的“中國(guó)文化特色”和“對(duì)奧林匹克理念和精神的深入發(fā)掘”都可以與“體現(xiàn)”一詞進(jìn)行搭配,做“體現(xiàn)”的賓語(yǔ),所以該句可譯為“All the designs fully embodied the Chinese culture and an in-depth understanding of the Olympic ideals and spirit”,這樣譯文更為精煉,也可節(jié)省譯者的時(shí)間。再比如:他們有時(shí)議議政,有時(shí)品品茶。英譯時(shí)不必重復(fù),譯為:They sometimes take counsel and sometimes tea.
5.“鮮紅的色彩傳達(dá)了中國(guó)文化特有的熱情氣氛”“熱情”可用不同的英語(yǔ)詞來(lái)表達(dá),如enthusiastic,warm-hearted, passionate等等,但是“紅色”通常所傳達(dá)的是一種喜慶的氣氛,經(jīng)常讓人聯(lián)想到一些歡慶的場(chǎng)合如節(jié)日、婚禮等,所以“熱情氣氛”應(yīng)當(dāng)是一種歡慶的節(jié)日氣氛,選用“festival”這個(gè)詞更符合上下文 語(yǔ)境。該句可譯為“The vivid red color conveys the festival atmosphere within Chinese culture”。
6.“寓意豐富的圖形,;也像一個(gè)沖向終點(diǎn)的運(yùn)動(dòng)員, ;又似一個(gè)載歌載舞中的人, ”我們?cè)诜g時(shí),要注意把握邏輯的準(zhǔn)確性。漢語(yǔ)講究整體印象、整體意義,有時(shí)不講究具體細(xì)節(jié)的準(zhǔn)確性,但是在譯成英語(yǔ)時(shí),我們應(yīng)當(dāng)挖掘其深層的邏輯含義,采用更符合邏輯的結(jié)構(gòu)。在文中,漢語(yǔ)中的表達(dá)是,“圖形 也像一個(gè)運(yùn)動(dòng)員 ;又似一個(gè)載歌載舞中的人, ”。如果直譯為,“The figure is not only like an athlete crossing the finish line, it is also like a dancing figure ”給聽者的印象是“這個(gè)圖形看起來(lái)像個(gè)運(yùn)動(dòng)員,像個(gè)載歌載舞中的人”,這與前文“寓意豐富”邏輯不符,“寓意豐富”只有通過理解才能得知,而“像”則表明一眼就可看出。因此可譯為:The figure resembles the Chinese character “Jing” which stands for the name of the host city. The figure not only depicts an athlete crossing the finish line, reflecting the Olympic spirit, it can also be interpreted as a dancing figure, conveying the anticipation of 1.3 billion Chinese people for the Olympic Games as well as their enthusiasm for receiving guests from all over the world.再如,“(改革開放膽子更大一些,敢于試驗(yàn),)不能像小腳女人一樣。”(《鄧選》,372頁(yè))如果把這句話譯成“We should not be like women with bound feet.”,意思還不是十分清楚,聽眾可能會(huì)認(rèn)為是“長(zhǎng)得像”,這與前文的“敢于試驗(yàn)”在邏輯上并不一致,若譯成“We must not act like women with bound feet”則前后呼應(yīng)。
7.“實(shí)現(xiàn)東方神韻與現(xiàn)代奧運(yùn)的完美結(jié)合”漢語(yǔ)中在選詞及整體思維上,都存在加強(qiáng)語(yǔ)氣的傾向,譯成英語(yǔ)時(shí)應(yīng)減弱語(yǔ)氣,改用不太強(qiáng)烈的詞匯與結(jié)構(gòu),以便讓英語(yǔ)國(guó)家的人民更容易接受。這句 話如果直譯為“We will achieve the perfect integration of the charm of oriental culture with modern Olympic philosophy.”這樣的翻譯可能讓聽者覺得我們所作的一切會(huì)無(wú)可挑剔,語(yǔ)氣過于生硬,我們可以將過于肯定的詞“perfect”省略掉,同時(shí)在句子中加入“wish”或“hope”等詞,使語(yǔ)氣更加委婉,這句話不妨改譯為“We hope to achieve the integration of the charm of oriental culture with modern Olympic philosophy”。
8.“認(rèn)真執(zhí)行這些法規(guī)是參與和支持奧運(yùn)會(huì)籌辦工作的實(shí)際行動(dòng)。”正確理解原文是翻譯的第一步,通過上下文,原文要表達(dá)的含義是如果想要參與和支持奧運(yùn)會(huì)籌辦工作就需要認(rèn)真執(zhí)行這些法規(guī)。因 此如果直譯為“Enforcing these regulations is an actual action to participate in and support the preparations for the Games”很令人費(fèi)解,所以不妨改譯為“Enforcing these regulations is essential to those who wish to participate in and support the preparations for the Games”。
adj. 法律的,合法的,法定的