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She still misses her second husband, activist Tom Hayden, who died in 2016. "He was brilliant. He was a movement star," Fonda says.
她仍然想念于2016年去世的第二任丈夫、維權人士湯姆·海登(Tom Hayden)。“他很聰明。他是一個運動明星，”方達說。
Still, it wasn't an easy marriage. "He made it hard to love him as a husband," she says. "He was a womanizer and an alcoholic."
盡管如此，這段婚姻并不容易。“他讓我很難像愛丈夫一樣愛他，”她說。“他是個好色之徒和酒鬼。”
Fonda says that when her career began to truly take of—she won a second Oscar for Coming Home, and her workout video was suddenly a bestseller—Hayden became detached.
方達說，當她的職業生涯真正開始——她因為《回家》獲得第二個奧斯卡獎，她的健身視頻突然成為最暢銷的——海登與她分開了。
"Because he was lonely, he fell in love with somebody else," she says. "I'm glad he did, because it gave me an excuse to leave. I wouldn't have been able to otherwise."
“因為孤獨，他愛上了別人，”她說。“我很高興他這么做了，因為這給了我一個離開的借口。否則我不可能做到。”
Fonda notes that she's still very close with Hayden's widow, Barbara, and their son Liam. "They're part of the family," she says.
方達說她和海登的遺孀芭芭拉以及他們的兒子利亞姆仍然非常親密。“他們是家庭的一部分，”她說。
"I love them so much." Ted Turner was the nicest guy ever—but she left him anyway.
“我非常愛他們。”泰德·特納是有史以來最好的男人，但她還是離開了他。
"He was handsome. He was sexy. He's brilliant," says Fonda of her billionaire media-mogul third husband, now 79. She embraced horse riding and flyfishing on his Montana ranch.
“他很英俊。他很性感。也確實聰明。”方達說起她現年79歲的第三任丈夫、媒體大亨、億萬富翁。她在他的蒙大拿牧場上騎馬和釣魚。
Yet she realized she'd always have to put her own needs secondary to his—and that was no longer acceptable to her.
然而她意識到，她總是不得不把自己的需要置于他的之后，而這對她來說已經不再是可接受的了。
"There was an angel on my shoulder saying, 'If you stay, you will die without ever becoming who you can be,'" she says. " ‘You will not really be authentic.' "
她說：“有一個天使站在我的肩膀上，對我說，‘如果你留下來，你就會死去，永遠也成不了你自己。’”“‘你不會真正做到真實。’”
She'll always feel sad that she wasn't a better mother.
她會一直為自己不是一個更好的母親而感到難過。
Fonda admits her relationship with her three children —Vanessa Vadim and her kids with Hayden, Troy Garity and Mary Williams— has often been strained.
方達承認，她和三個孩子——凡妮莎·瓦迪姆(vanessa Vadim)以及她和海登(Hayden)、特洛伊·加里蒂(Troy Garity)和瑪麗·威廉姆斯(Mary Williams)——的關系經常很緊張。
"I felt like I was a bad mother," Fonda says in the documentary, calling herself "terrified" as a young mom. But she's working on it.
“我覺得自己是個壞媽媽，”方達在紀錄片中說。她稱自己剛做媽媽時“嚇壞了”。但她正在努力。
"I am trying to make up for what I didn't know before," she has said. "I want them to love me, and I have to earn that." She beat bulimia in her mid-40s and has never looked back.
“我正在努力彌補我以前不知道的，”她說。“我希望他們愛我，這是我應得的。”她在45歲左右就戰勝了暴食癥，而且從未復發。
Fonda's struggle with eating disorders began in her teens, when her father would criticize her weight.
方達與飲食失調的斗爭開始于她十幾歲的時候，那時她的父親會批評她的體重。
"I heard my father say things about my body that have twisted my life in deep ways ever since," she says.
她說：“我聽到父親說我的身體，從那以后我的生活嚴重扭曲。”
As for conquering the disease, she says, "I realized that if I continued to be controlled by these addictions, my life would fall apart.
至于戰勝這種疾病，她說，“我意識到，如果我繼續被這些癮所控制，我的生活就會崩潰。
As you get older, with each binge the fatigue, the hostility, the self-loathing lasts longer. I had a husband, children, a career...so I stopped cold turkey. It was so hard."
隨著年齡的增長，每一次狂歡，疲勞，敵意，自我厭惡都會持續更長時間。我有丈夫，孩子，事業……所以，我一下子就戒了。這太難了。”
Her workout videos helped: They "gave me back a sense of control over my body . . . and that kind of cemented my ability to eat normally."
她的健身視頻很有幫助：它們“讓我重拾了對身體的控制力……這鞏固了我正常飲食的能力。”
Her insecurities will always be with her, but they won't define her. "You can't banish the mons," Fonda admit her lifelong feelings of inadequacy.
她的不安全感將永遠伴隨著她，但它們不會定義她。“你不能把摩門教徒趕出去，”方達承認她一生的不足感。
"They're still there, but you learn to put them in their corner and not let their voices be the governing voices."
“他們還在那里，但你要學會把他們放在角落里，不要讓他們的聲音成為主導聲音。”
She says she still has plenty more to learn-and she's happier than she's ever been.
她說她還有很多東西要學，而且她比以前更快樂了。
"I'm 80 years old. Half of my joints are replaced. I won't live that much longer. But I'm really srtong now."
“我80歲了。我一半的關節都換了。我活不了那么久了。但我現在真的很強大。”
