評論
打印
Okay, we're headed out. See you later.
我們要出門了，再見。
Before you leave, could you test these noise-cancelling headphones?
你倆走之前，能幫我測試一下這降噪耳機嗎？
Yeah, sure. Okay. Go ahead.
好呀。開始吧。
Hello, can you hear me?
你好，能聽見我說話嗎？
Sheldon, I haven't changed the filter in the water pitcher in two years.
謝爾頓，咱家水壺里的濾水器已經兩年沒換過了。
Uh, Bernadette's nickname for you is the virgin pina colada.
伯納黛特給你取了個外號叫處子雞尾酒。（意為無酒精的雞尾酒）。
Your George Lucas autograph is really a "me" autograph.
你收藏的喬治·盧卡斯簽名其實是我的簽名。
Yeah, well, once I was too lazy to walk across the hall, so I used your toothbrush.
有一次我懶得走回我家去，于是我借用了你的牙刷。
Ooh, and one time when you were asleep, Amy totally took off her...And that's why you're the best roommate ever.
還有一次你睡著了，艾米脫掉了她的......所以你才是百里挑一的好室友。
Now I'm sad I didn't hear it.
真可惜我沒聽到這些好話。
So what do you need the headphones for?
你拿這降噪耳機干嘛用呢？
Well, I've been struggling for months to come up with a theory of dark matter that doesn't make protons decay.
我這幾個月一直在研究暗物質中質子不衰變的問題。
I'm hoping to finally tackle it by optimizing my work environment. See, I've got, uh, my tea is at the perfect sipping temperature.
我希望能靠優化工作環境的辦法來解決這個問題。所以我準備了最佳飲用溫度的茶。
Uh, I have fleece-lined boxer shorts to keep my tushie toasty.
還穿上了加絨的四角內褲保暖我的小屁屁。
And then, oh, last but not least, this inspirational cat poster, improved with the reassuring face of physics renegade Richard Feynman.
最后但也是同樣重要的一點，這張激勵人心的貓咪海報，上面印著物理學界的叛徒理查德·費曼和藹可親的臉。
Is that why you had to take him to Office Depot last night?
這就是你昨晚帶他去文具店的原因嗎？
I don't want to talk about it. There, the place is all yours. Yeah, have fun.
我不想聊這件事。好了，這地盤歸你了。好好玩吧。
Oh, I wil. Nothing more fun than a paradigm-shifting evening of science.
我會的。沒有比改變世界的科學之夜更讓人開心的了。
And you thought it was soaping me up in the shower. Bye.
你卻說替我搓澡才是最開心的事。拜拜。
Okay. Here we go. Proton decay. Proton decay. Proton decay. Proton decay. Proton decay. Proton decay.
好了。開始吧。質子衰變。質子衰變。質子衰變。質子衰變。質子衰變。質子衰變。
Hey, we're home. Ahhh! Any progress?
我們回來了。啊啊啊！有什么進展嗎？
How could there be? ! With these constant interruptions.
怎么可能有進展？！你們老是打擾我。
I love him, but if he's broken, let's not get a new one.
我愛他，但如果他壞掉了，我們別再買新的了。
What are you doing? It's time to go.
你在干什么？該上班了。
I'm not going to work today. And would you like to know why?
我今天不去上班。你想知道為什么嗎？
Ah, you're upset because you spent the whole night working on dark matter and didn't make a breakthrough, and now you're worried you made a huge mistake switching fields, and you're gonna sit around and sulk all day?
你不高興，因為你花了一整晚研究暗物質卻找不到突破口，現在你擔心轉換研究方向的決定是錯誤的，于是你要窩在家里生一整天悶氣？
Like a big old baby. Call me if you need anything.
就像一個大寶寶。有需要給我打電話。
I've been cooped up in here too long. Maybe I need some fresh air.
我在這里悶太久了，也許我需要點新鮮空氣。
Penny? Penny? Penny? Ugh, what?
佩妮？佩妮？佩妮？什么事？
You sounded in distress. I was worried something unpleasant was happening to you. Like a murder. Or spontaneous coitus with Leonard.
聽起來你很痛苦，我擔心你是不是遇到了麻煩。比如有人要謀殺你，或者是萊納德突然找你滾床單。
Oh, I'm just doing this awful workout. I hate it.
我只是在鍛煉。討厭死了。
Well, if you hate it, then why are you doing it? Although I could ask the same question about coitus with Leonard.
如果你討厭，干嘛還要做呢？當然我對你和萊納德滾床單這件事也有同樣的問題。
I don't know. I guess I like that I hate it. It makes me work harder.
我想，我就是喜歡這種討厭它的感覺吧，可以激發我的斗志。
And to clarify...The exercise, Sheldon. Shouldn't you be getting ready for work?
你是指... 我是指鍛煉，謝爾頓。你不是應該準備上班了嗎？
I'm not going. Would you like to know why?
我今天不上班。你想知道為什么嗎？
Uh, you're sad about not getting anything done last night, so you're gonna sit around and pout about it?
你不高興，因為你昨晚什么都沒搞出來，所以你要窩在家里生一整天悶氣？
Boy, I'm not nearly as mysterious as I think I am.
我完全不如自己預期的那么神秘莫測啊。
I invented a game. You want to play? Sure.
我發明了一個游戲，想玩嗎？好啊。
It's called "Emily or Cinnamon"" I give you actual quotes I've heard Raj say, and you guess if he was talking to his girlfriend or his dog.
名字叫"艾米麗還是小桂子"。我告訴你們拉杰曾經說過的話，你來猜一猜這些話的對象是女朋友還是狗。
Go ahead, make fun. You can't embarrass me. I've got a beautiful girlfriend and a dog who loves me so much she drinks my bathwater.
好啊，你想笑就笑吧。我可不會覺得尷尬。我有一個漂亮女友和一條愛我愛到愿意喝我洗澡水的狗。
Okay, who was he talking to, Emily or Cinnamon: "I want you to know, the bed feels so lonely when you're not in it."
很好，這是對誰說的，艾米麗還是小桂子："你要知道，你不在的時候，空蕩蕩的床顯得好孤單。"
Yeah. I may not be liking this game so much. Cinnamon. Give me another one.
我可不怎么喜歡這個游戲。小桂子。再來一個。
Okay, Emily or Cinnamon: "Check it out, I got us matching sweaters!"
好的，艾米麗還是小桂子："看看，我給咱倆買了情侶毛衣"！
We all got the Christmas card-Cinnamon.
我們都收到了他的圣誕卡。當然是小桂子。
You know, a man can care deeply about a woman and a pet. It's not strange.
一個男人可以同時關愛他的女人和他的狗。這并不奇怪。
Ooh, Emily. I heard him say that to Emily. Hey, I thought you were staying home.
艾米麗。這話我聽過他對艾米麗說過。你不是要待在家里嗎。
Yeah, I was, but after talking to Penny, I realized something. I...first, she's trying much harder to stay attractive in this relationship than you are.
是的，但和佩妮聊過之后，我發現了一件事。我...首先，她為了保持對你的吸引力，付出的努力可比你多。
And second...the reason I may not be progressing in my research is I've created too pleasant of an environment for myself.
其次，我毫無進展的原因，就是我為自己打造的環境太舒適了。
What do you mean?
什么意思？
According to a classic psychological experiment by Yerkes and Dodson, in order to maximize performance, one must create a state of productive anxiety.
根據葉杜二氏的心理學實驗，想提高工作效率，就必須營造一種焦慮緊張的氣氛。
So I'd like to ask you all to do something for me. Keep me on my toes. Just throw me off my game. EEssentially, go out of your way to make my life miserable.
所以我希望你們能幫我個忙。別讓我放松下來。攻我不備。最重要的是，使勁渾身解數讓我難受。
Hold on. What's in it for us? Well, I suppose...Okay, we'll do it!
等等。這么做對我們有什么好處？我覺得吧.. 好，我們同意了！
Done. 33 seconds. Okay, that'll be our baseline.
做完了。33秒。這就是我們的基準線。
You know, I don't want to tell you how to do your job, but when a mouse completes a maze, it gets a food pellet.
我不想教你怎么工作，不過如果一只老鼠走通了迷宮，它會得到飼料獎勵。
It also gets its brain plucked out with tweezers.
它的大腦還會被鑷子夾出來呢。
And his last meal was a food pellet? You're a monster.
而它的最后一餐只是一顆飼料？你真是禽獸。
All right, next, we're gonna introduce an anxiety-inducing stimulus, measure your stress levels and see how it affects your problem-"lving rate.
好了，接下來，我們要逐步加強緊張焦慮刺激，測量你的應力水平，觀察它對你思考能力的影響。
Very well. And good luck-I'm a pretty laid-back guy. Ready? Begin.
很好。祝你好運。我可是個處變不驚的人哦。準備好了嗎？開始。
Why'd you pop it? I'm "rry, I was aiming for your heart.
你為什么要戳破？對不起，我本來瞄準的是你的心臟。
Look, I know you don't like it, but that's the point of the experiment.
我知道你不喜歡，但這是實驗的意義所在。
I need to irritate you to find your optimal anxiety zone.
我需要激怒你，來找到你的最佳焦慮區。
And you said no to tickling, polka music or watching me eat a banana.
而且你不要撓癢癢，波爾卡舞曲，或看我吃香蕉。
Who eats them horizontally? !
誰會橫著啃香蕉啊？！
My mother said that's how good girls do it.
我媽說好女孩都是這么吃的。
Perhaps this was a waste of time.
也許這是浪費時間。
Sheldon, you're a remarkable scientist. Just be patient, I'm sure you'll find the breakthrough you've been looking for. Thank you.
謝爾頓，你是了不起的科學家。耐心一點，我確信你會找到一直尋覓的突破口。謝謝。
And if you only do "lid research instead of making a groundbreaking discovery, what does it matter?
而且如果你只進行可靠研究而不是有開創性的發現，那又有什么關系呢？
"Only do "lid research"? ! Uh...I come to you for help, and you insult me? !
只進行可靠研究？！我來找你幫忙，你卻侮辱我？！
I thought the least that you would do would be...Look, your anxiety levels are right in the zone.
我原以為你至少可以...看，你的焦慮水平達標了。
Really? Oh, that's fantastic. NNow, wait, they're dropping. Why are they dropping?
真的嗎？真是太好了。慢著，又落下去了。為什么落下去了？
Because you're happy they're elevated. Oh, that is infuriating!
因為你開心數值提高了。真是氣死我了！
Ooh, look, they went back up again. Terrific. Oh, no, they went back down!
看，又上升了。太好了。不好，又落下去了！
All right, guys, what game do you want to play?
各位，你們想玩什么游戲？
Let's see. How about "Emily or Cinnamon"?
來看看。不如玩"艾米麗或小桂子"？
You know what? I think it's a little weird that you remember me saying all these things. Maybe the truth is-- you're jealous of all my relationships.
知道嗎？你記得我說過的這些話，感覺有點奇怪。也許真相是，你嫉妒我所擁有的這些關系。
Oh, maybe I am. Who wouldn't want to be the girl, or possibly dog, to hear the words: "You're " lucky. You have the shiniest hair"
也許我是嫉妒。誰不想做這樣的女孩，也有可能是狗，聽到以下的話："你真幸運。你有著最閃亮的頭發[毛發]。"
That is a tough one. Uh, II know he brushes both of them.
好難抉擇。我知道他既幫女友梳發，也幫狗梳毛。
Gentlemen...Yeah.
先生們... 在。
I have figured out the perfect way for you to irritate me.
我想到了你們激怒我的最完美方法。
I'd like you to be my intellectual sparring partners.
我想你們做我的智力拳擊陪練。
From now on, when I make an assertion, I need you to challenge it.
從現在開始，我發表的任何言論你們都要提出質疑。
" you just want us to disagree with whatever you say? Yes.
就是說你說什么我們都反對嗎？是的。
And you think that's going to help? Yes.
你覺得這樣有幫助？是的。
Well, I don't think that's gonna help at all.
我覺得這樣做完全沒幫助。
Oh, no, it will. See, by keeping my mind engaged, I'll become more focused.
不，會有的。我的大腦保持忙碌，我會更專心。
Howard's right. That'll never work.
霍華德說得對，這招不會有用的。
Stop fighting me on the premise. It's scientifically valid. I'm going to advance propositions, I just want you to challenge me.
別就管不管用反對我。這完全是有科學依據的。我會提出命題，我只是需要你們質疑我。
I don't think that's what you want at all.
我覺得這完全不是你想要的。
Why, of course it's what I want. Why would I say it's what I want if it's not what I want?
這當然是我想要的。如果不是，我為什么會說這是我想要的？
Because it is what you want, and it's not what you said.
因為這是你想要的，卻不是你所說的。
I ask you for one simple thing, and you can't even do it.
我要求你們做這么簡單的事，你們都做不到。
Yes, we can. Yeah, well, then do it. Nah.
我們可以。那就照做。就不。
You guys are the worst. Thank you, I think that was helpful.
你們差勁死了。謝謝，我想剛才有幫助。
