評論
打印
Chandler: Well, I was trying to prove that I was right. You know? And it turns out I was wrong. And now it's lodged in my throat.
我想證明我是對的，結果我錯了。現在它卡在我的喉嚨里。
Monica: Damn it! You know this whole time we were concentrating on the babies and and no one was watching Chandler!
真是的，我們光顧著帶小孩，都忘了要看著錢德！
Judge: Ok, you two are asking the court for an annulment?
兩位要申請注銷婚姻？
Rachel: Yes your honor, and here're, are forms, all filled out.
是的，申請表都填好了。
Judge: So, based on your petition… You are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable?
根據申請書所言……你申請注銷的理由是，蓋勒先生的精神狀況不穩定。
Ross: Fine, I'm mentally unstable.
好，我精神狀況不穩定。
Judge: And based on the fact that Mr. Geller is intravenous drug user.
而且他使用靜脈注射毒品。
Ross: What? !
什么？！
Rachel: Uh yes, heroin and crack.
是的，海洛因與快克。
Ross: Crack isn't even an intravenous drug!
快克根本不是靜脈注射毒品！
Rachel: Well, you would know.
你當然很了解了。
Judge: Now it also says here that you uh, lied about your sexual preference before marriage?
這上面還說你在婚前隱瞞性向？
Ross: Oh, come on!
拜托！
Rachel: Ross, please, I found the magazines!
羅斯，我發現那些雜志了！
Judge: And finally, that you were unable to consummate the marriage. Well, that makes sense since you're gay and addicted to heroin.
還有你無法履行夫妻間的義務。這也難怪，你是同志，又注射海洛因。
Ross: Ok, you know you know this's I'm sorry, this is insane!
很抱歉，這太夸張了！
Ross: I I I'm not addicted to heroin, I'm not gay, and there is no problem with my ability to consummate anything!
我沒有注射海洛因，我不是同志，我履行什么都沒問題！
Ross: Look, I'll I'll consummate this marriage right here, right now!
我現在就可以在這里履行！
Judge: That won't be necessary.
沒有這個必要。
Ross: And when we were dating we consummated like bunnies! Rachel: Ugh!
我們交往時簡直跟兔子有得拼。額！
Judge: Now if you two were involved in a serious relationship, that really creates a problem.
如果你們曾經認真交往，那就有問題了。
Rachel: Ross! Your honor, rest assured, that relationship ended like two years ago! And can you please strike ‘Consummated like bunnies’ from the record?
法官大人，我們2年前就分手了！可以刪掉“跟兔子有得拼”嗎？
Judge: Is there anything, in this record that is actually true?
這份申請書有任何實言嗎？
Rachel: Uh, well, yes, we uh, we got married in Vegas and uh, and the names, I think?
有，我們確實在拉斯維加斯結婚，名字應該也沒錯，我覺得？
Judge: That's not the way the legal system works. This process is based on an objective review of the facts, not of the lie.
這樣不符合法律程序。申請注銷得根據客觀事實，而不是謊言。
Rachel: Objection!
抗議！
Judge: It doesn't work like that either.
這樣也不合程序。
Rachel: Overruled.
駁回。
Ross: Oh, stop it.
別鬧了。
Judge: Well, based on what I've heard, you two certainly don't qualify for an annulment. If you don't wanna be together you'll have to file for divorce.
從剛才的話聽來，兩位不符合注銷資格。如果你們不想在一起，就必須辦理離婚。
Ross: That's great! You happy now? Look what you did with your funny, funny form!
太好了，你高興了嗎？都是你的搞笑表格害的！
Rachel: What? ! Me? ! What about you and your consummated like bunnies nonsense!
什么？我？你那句跟兔子有得拼呢？！
Ross: And what And what're you typing that for? See what she said? We don't get the annulment.
那……你打什么打？你聽到沒？我們不能辦注銷了。
Ross: Don't type that! What? ! Stop typing! Hey! Stop typing! Stop typing, stop typing!
不要打，別再打了。別再打了。別打了！別打了！
Rachel: Ok, ok, do you see, do you see what you're keeping me married to? !
你看你讓我嫁的是什么人？！
Judge: You need to get out of my chambers.
請兩位離開我的辦公室。
Rachel: All right, look, lady here is the deal. I came here for an annulment and I am not leaving here until I get one!
好，你給我聽著。我是來辦注銷的，沒辦成我絕對不走。
Judge: Would you like to spend the night in jail?
你們想在牢里過夜嗎？
Rachel: Hey thank you for your time.
耽誤您時間了。
Joey: So the Porsche guy took his car back.
保時捷的主人把車開走了。
Chandler: But you found the keys to his clothes?
但你撿到他的衣櫥鑰匙？
Joey: No. I just uh, I just loved the way it feels when everybody thinks I own a Porsche.
不是，我只是喜歡大家以為我有保時捷的感覺。
Monica: And people will think you own a Porsche because you're wearing the clothes?
你穿這樣別人就會以為你有？
Joey: Of course!
那當然！
Monica: Only an idiot would wear this stuff if you didn't have the car! Right?
白癡才會沒車還穿成這樣，不是嗎？
Chandler: That is true.
那倒是。
Phoebe: Yeah, but only a genius would swallow a sonic blaster gun.
不過只有天才才會誤食音波死光槍。
Joey: Oh, I've been there. Yeah, I am gonna go drive my Porsche.
我也誤食過。我要去開我的保時捷了。
Monica: Joey, you know you don't actually have one.
喬伊，你知道你沒有保時捷吧。
Joey: Come on! What are you doing? ! I'm in character! Will you talk to her? !
拜托！你搞什么？我正在入戲，你說說她，好嗎？！
Chandler: Ahh, I think it just moved. It's really poking me.
它動了，現在真的好刺。
Monica: All right, that's it, we're going to the emergency room.
夠了，我們去掛急診。
Phoebe: What? ! No, you can't, you can't leave me here with them! We're babysitting!
什么？你們不能把我扔給他們，我們正在帶孩子！
Monica: The babies are asleep, I'm sure you'll be ok on your own for a while!
寶寶都睡了，你撐一下一定沒問題！
Phoebe: But you you can't leave me with them! We we're a team! We're playing a zone! They're gonna triple team me!
但你們不能把我扔給他們！我們是一隊的，在打區域聯防，他們會以三打一！
Monica: He's got something plastic lodged into his throat, we've gotta go to the hospital.
他的喉嚨卡了個塑膠玩具，我們非去醫院不可。
Phoebe: But no, because a doctor won't be able to help him, it's just gonna you know naturally pass through his system in like seven years.
但醫生也幫不了他，反正過個7年就會自動排出。
Chandler: I think that's gum.
那是口香糖。
Phoebe: I'm pretty sure it's gun.
我確定是死光槍。
Chandler: Ok, listen, this really hurts. Let's go.
真的很痛，我們走吧。
Phoebe: But no uh come A real man wouldn't just run to the hospital! No! What would, what would Krog do?
男子漢才不會沖去醫院。克洛格會怎么做？
Joey: Why isn't that valet back with my Porsche?
那小子怎么還沒把我的保時捷開來？
Passerby: Maybe because you've got the keys?
因為鑰匙在你手上嗎？
Rachel: That is totally your fault!
都是你的錯！
Ross: My fault? ! You threatened the judge!
我的錯？你威脅法官！
Rachel: Well, you ripped the paper out of the court reporter's machine!
你把簿記員的打字紙撕下來！
Ross: That was the only way I could get him to stop typing!
那樣才能阻止他打下去！
Joey: Hi! How are the Gellers?
蓋勒夫婦好嗎？
Rachel: Don't, call us, that!
不準那樣叫我們！
Ross: The judge wouldn't let us get an annulment! Now we gotta get a divorce!
法官不準我們辦注銷，我們得去辦離婚！
Ross: Did a Porsch throw up on you?
你被“保時夾”附身了嗎？
Joey: Hey! It's Porsche! !
是保時捷！！
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right?
我完全可以照顧你們對吧？你們覺得很安心吧？
Phoebe: Ok, I'm gonna take that spit bubble as, ‘Yeah, I do!’. Ok, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, I'll set you up with a nice clean one.
吐泡泡就表示“是的”。我扔了臟尿布，就幫你換一塊干凈的。
Phoebe: Ok, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Ok? Cause let's face it, we're at Monica's.
抱歉，我不是故意的，我得先清理一下。因為這是莫妮卡的家。
Phoebe: I broke it. All right. Well, that's just the way things go. Ok, good.
破了，反正東西遲早都會壞。好，就這樣。
Phoebe: Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you can't answer. Leslie? Where are you Leslie?
為什么只剩兩個？萊絲莉呢？你們不會說話，萊絲莉？你在哪里？
Phoebe: Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words!
萊絲莉，現在是開口說話的好時機！
Phoebe: Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! Oh, you're a lot mischievous! Well, it'll dry.
你看看你！你有點調皮喔！真是的！是非常調皮！好吧，它自己會干的。
Phoebe: Ok, you sit with your brother and sister now who aren't there!
去跟哥哥妹妹躺在一起…… 他們不在那！
Phoebe: How do you feel?
你還好嗎？
Chandler: Well, let's just say that Krog will be fully equipped to destroy the universe again in twelve to fourteen hours.
再過12到14小時，克洛格就又能毀滅宇宙了。
Phoebe: Ok, so I totally took care of the babies all by myself! I fed them, bathed them, and put them to bed.
我一個人把孩子都帶好了，喂奶、洗澡、哄他們睡覺。
Chandler: And protected them from a tornado?
還保護他們躲過龍卷風？
Monica: Oh my God.
我的天哪。
Phoebe: I know, the babies are asleep.
對啊，寶寶都睡了。
Monica: Phoebe, what, what happened here? !
菲比，家里是怎么了？
Phoebe: I did it! I took care of the babies all by myself!
我做到了，我一個人照顧寶寶！
Monica: But my apartment!
但是我的房子。
Chandler: Was the setting of Phoebe's triumph.
是菲比勝利的戰場。
Monica: But the mess!
但是這一團亂。
Chandler: Is not as important as the fact that Phoebe took care of the babies all by herself.
比起菲比的辛勞實在不算什么。
Monica: You're right, you're right, I shouldn't freak out. 'Cause this is what's gonna be like when you and I have babies! When will that be? !
你說得對，我不該大驚小怪。等我們有了孩子也會這樣，那是什么時候呢？
Chandler: Phoebe, would you take a look at this mess!
菲比，你看你弄得多亂！
Rachel: Oh honey thank God you're home, I was getting worried.
親愛的，你總算回來了，我都開始擔心了。
Ross: I picked up the divorce papers. Uh, I've already signed everything and I put little 'X's where you need to sign.
我去領了離婚證書。該簽的我都簽了，你要簽的地方我也畫了叉。
Rachel: Oh, little 'X's! Great! That makes up for everything!
畫叉，真好，這樣就盡釋前嫌了！
Ross: You know, I I you've done a lot of stupid stuff too! Ok?
知道嗎……你也干過很多蠢事好嗎。
Rachel: Oh, name one stupid thing that is as stupid as this one!
有哪一件跟這次一樣蠢！
Ross: Ok, how about you flew to London to stop my wedding! Ah, how about you told me you loved me after I was already married!
你飛去倫敦阻止我結婚怎么說！我已經結婚了，你還說你愛我！
Rachel: Hey! Wait a minute! That was different! I did those things because I was in love with you!
慢著，那不一樣，我做那些事是因為我愛你！
Ross: Yeah! Right! You're right. That's very different. So let's, let's just sign the papers.
正是！你說得對，的確很不一樣，總之趕快簽一簽吧。
Ross: What?
怎樣？
Rachel: Nothing.
沒事。
Ross: Ok, can we just sign, please? Congratulations.
請簽名。恭喜你。
Rachel: Ok wait Ross, we're wait a minute. Umm. I uh, I kinda have a little confession.
羅斯，等一下。我有件事要坦白。
Ross: What?
什么事？
Rachel: Uh. . well you know this whole marriage thing, kinda my idea.
結婚這件事算是我的主意。
Ross: Excuse me?
什么？
Rachel: Uh well, remember how, we were too drunk to remember anything that night we were married?
好吧，我們不是醉到什么都想不起來嗎？
Ross: Yeah?
怎樣？
Rachel: And uh, yeah, I didn't really, I didn't wanna say anything, but it just kinda, kept coming back to me, and umm, remember we were in the casino and for some reason you thought it would be funny to eat a lot of grapes. And uh, and I thought it would be funnier if we got married. So as a, as a compromise we decided first to get married, and then to eat a lot of grapes. So umm, sorry I got us, into this whole thing.
我很不想說，但是我的記憶一直回來。記不記得我們在賭場，你突然覺得狂吃葡萄會很好玩。然后我覺得我們結婚會更好玩。于是我們折中，先去結婚，再去吃很多葡萄。抱歉惹出這些麻煩。
Ross: So then if if I mean if you think about it, this is all your fault.
所以仔細想想，這一切都是你的錯。
Rachel: Yeah, don't push it though.
不要得寸進尺。
Ross: I gotta say, I know I'd divorce a lot of women, . Never thought I'd be divorcing you.
我知道我跟很多人離過婚。卻從來沒想過會跟你離婚。
Rachel: I know. I always thought if we got married, that'd be the one that stuck. And it wouldn't be a secret, and we wouldn't have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut.
是啊，我總覺得要是我們結婚，一定會天長地久。不會是秘密結婚，也不會在必勝客吃酒席。
Ross: Oh, did I, did I even treat?
我有請客嗎？
Rachel: No, it was on the house, it was, it was a newlywed special.
沒有，那是免費的，新婚夫婦特惠。
Ross: That may be the most depressing thing I've heard in my life. I should probably get these to my lawyer's office.
我沒聽過這么令人沮喪的事。我要送去律師那里。
Rachel: Yeah. Hey, thanks, Ross, for taking care of all this.
謝謝你把事情都辦妥。
Ross: Eh, no problem.
不客氣。
Rachel: I'm gonna need a copy of those.
我要一份副本。
Ross: Totally.
沒問題。
Joey: Hey! Hey! Hey! Be careful around my Porsche!
嘿！嘿！嘿！別在我的保時捷旁邊亂跑！
Woman: Hi Joey.
喬伊。
Joey: Hey! How you doing?
你們好嗎？
Woman: He has the most amazing Porsche under there!
他有一輛最拉風的保時捷！
Joey: I'd love to show you, but I just tucked her in. She's sleeping. Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink?
我很想給你們看，但我剛哄到她睡著。你們兩位想去喝一杯嘛？
