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"I didn't care," says Chris, who was 20 when he met Deanna at a party in North Carolina.
“我不在乎，”克里斯說。當時他20歲，在北卡羅來納的一個聚會上見到了蒂娜。
"I didn't feel threatened. I wanted her to be happy with who she was and not hide that or be ashamed."
“我沒有感到威脅。我想讓她對自己感到快樂，而不是隱藏或感到羞恥。”
At the time, Chris was a vacuum-cleaner sales-man by day and an aspiring rock singer by night, living in his parents' mobile home in Virginia.
當時，克里斯白天是一名吸塵器銷售員，晚上則是一名有抱負的搖滾歌手，住在他父母位于弗吉尼亞州的活動房屋里。
Just out of a five-year relationship himself, he was ready for single life—until he and Deanna, a massage therapist, made an instant connection.
剛結束五年的戀愛，他就準備過單身生活，直到他和迪安娜，一位按摩大師治療師，建立了即時的聯系。
Chris soon moved into her North Carolina home, the couple wed, and they began coparenting Deanna's two children. Chris credits his wife for pushing him to audition for Idol.
克里斯很快搬進了她在北卡羅來納州的家，這對夫婦結婚了，他們開始共同撫養蒂娜的兩個孩子。克里斯把參加《美國偶像》試鏡的機會歸功于他的妻子。
Finishing fourth, he built a passionate fan base with his power-rock vocals, and his self-titled band took off. The meteoric rise, though, took a devastating toll on his marriage.
以第四名的成績結束后，他憑借自己強有力的搖滾嗓音建立了一個充滿激情的粉絲群，他的同名樂隊也開始走紅。然而，他的事業突飛猛進，給他的婚姻帶來了毀滅性的打擊。
Chris says he got swept up in a rock-star ego, and he admits "there's been infidelity." Says Deanna: "He was a different human being then. Like, I don't even know that guy."
克里斯說他沉浸在搖滾明星的自我中，他承認“有不忠行為”。迪安娜說：“那時他是一個不同的人。我甚至不認識那個人。”
Though Chris expressed deep remorse—"he wanted to fix it," Deanna says—she withdrew emotionally.
盡管克里斯表達了深深的懊悔——“他想要修復它，”迪安娜說——但她在感情上退縮了。
The turning point came, she says, when she finally tried to see things from her husband's perspective and sensed his own identity struggle.
她說，轉折點來了，她終于試著從丈夫的角度看問題，感覺到他自己的身份斗爭。
"I knew it didn't really have anything to do with me," she says. "It never does." Still, Deanna struggled with her self-esteem, complicated by her sexual identity.
她說：“我知道這真的與我無關。”“一直都與我無關。”盡管如此，迪安娜還是在為自己的自尊而掙扎，因為她的性別身份，事情更加復雜。
"He was drowning in the stuff he was dealing with," she says, "and I was drowning in the stuff I was dealing with. We both had to learn to save ourselves."
她說：“他沉浸在他正在處理的事情中，而我也沉浸在我正在處理的事情中。我們都必須學會自救。”
What each of them learned, she says, began the journey that led her to share the "As You Are" lyrics.
她說，他們每個人學到的東西，開啟了她分享“做你自己”歌詞的旅程。
By then Chris was committed to becoming a better partner, and in the past three years, Deanna says, their marriage has become one of "an open heart and growth."
那時，克里斯決心成為一個更好的伴侶，迪安娜說，在過去的三年里，他們的婚姻已經有了“一顆開放的心和成長”。
The spacious home they share with their younger children radiates health and caring, from the vegan-centric pantry to the meditation room off the foyer.
他們和年幼的孩子們住的寬敞的房子散發著健康和關愛的氣息，從以素食主義者為中心的食品儲藏室到門廳外的冥想室。
A master-bedroom painting declares "I Love Us." Deanna knows people may wonder why she's revealing her bisexuality when she and Chris have a monogamous commitment.
一幅主臥室的油畫上寫著“我愛我們”。迪安娜知道，人們可能會好奇，當她和克里斯承諾一夫一妻制時，她為什么要暴露自己的雙性戀身份。
Her response: Openness is the only antidote to fear and shame. "There is nothing wrong with the fact that I have the capacity to love somebody regardless of their gender."
她的回答是：坦誠是消除恐懼和羞恥的唯一良藥。“我有能力去不論性別地愛一個人，這并沒有錯。”
For his part, Chris is grateful that this song gives him a role in Deanna's coming-out story.
對于克里斯來說，他很感激這首歌讓他在蒂娜的出柜故事中扮演了一個角色。
"I'm super-proud," he says, "that she feels strong enough to be so open and honest about it. We're both after the same goal, and that's being true to ourselves with each other."
“我非常自豪，”他說，“她覺得自己足夠強大，可以對這件事如此坦誠。我們都在追求同樣的目標，這就是對彼此忠實。”
