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And this is where my story starts. When I was a young researcher, doctoral student,
我的故事從這里開始。當我還是個年輕的博士研究生的時候，
my first year, I had a research professor who said to us, "Here's the thing, if you cannot measure it, it does not exist."
第一年，有位研究教授對我們說：“事實是這樣的，如果有一個東西你無法測量，那么它就不存在。”
And I thought he was just sweet-talking me. I was like, "Really?" and he was like, "Absolutely."
我心想他只是在哄哄我們這些小孩子吧。我說：“真的么？”他說：“當然。”
And so you have to understand that I have a bachelor's and a master's in social work,
你得知道，我有一個社會工作的學士文憑，一個社會工作的碩士文憑，
and I was getting my Ph.D. in social work, so my entire academic career was surrounded by people who kind of believed in the "life's messy, love it."
我在讀的是一個社會工作的博士文憑，所以我整個學術生涯都被人所包圍，他們大抵相信生活是一團亂麻，接受它。
And I'm more of the, "life's messy, clean it up, organize it and put it into a bento box."
而我的觀點則傾向于，“生活是一團亂麻，解開它，把它整理好，再歸類放入便當盒里。”
And so to think that I had found my way, to found a career that takes me -- really, one of the big sayings in social work is, "Lean into the discomfort of the work."
我覺得我領悟到了關鍵，有能力去創一番事業，讓自己--真的，社會工作的一個重要理念是置身于工作的不適中。
And I'm like, knock discomfort upside the head and move it over and get all A's. That was my mantra.
我就是要把這不適翻個底朝天，每科都拿到A。這就是我當時的信條。
So I was very excited about this. And so I thought, you know what, this is the career for me, because I am interested in some messy topics.
我當時真的是躍躍欲試。我想這就是我要的職業生涯，因為我對亂成一團，難以處理的課題感興趣。
But I want to be able to make them not messy. I want to understand them.
我想要把它們弄清楚。我想要理解它們。
I want to hack into these things that I know are important and lay the code out for everyone to see.
我想侵入那些，我知道是重要的東西，把它們摸透，然后用淺顯易懂的方式呈獻給每一個人。
So where I started was with connection. Because, by the time you're a social worker for 10 years, what you realize is that connection is why we're here.
所以我的起點是“關系”。因為當你從事了10年的社會工作，你必然會發現關系是我們活著的原因。
It's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives. This is what it's all about.
它賦予了我們生命的意義。就是這么簡單。
It doesn't matter whether you talk to people who work in social justice, mental health and abuse and neglect,
無論你跟誰交流，工作在社會執法領域的也好，負責精神健康、虐待和疏于看管領域的也好，
what we know is that connection, the ability to feel connected, is -- neurobiologically that's how we're wired -- it's why we're here.
我們所知道的是，關系是種感應的能力--生物神經上，我們是這么被設定的--這就是為什么我們在這兒。
So I thought, you know what, I'm going to start with connection.
所以我就從關系開始。
Well, you know that situation where you get an evaluation from your boss,
下面這個場景我們再熟悉不過了，你的上司給你作工作評估，
and she tells you 37 things that you do really awesome, and one "opportunity for growth?"
她告訴了你37點你做得相當棒的地方，還有一點--成長的空間？
