I never really thought about why I went to such efforts to mute my achievements from such a young age.
我從沒真正想過,為什么我在這么年輕時,就會如此努力地隱藏自己的成就。
Then, about ten years after I graduated from business school,
從哈佛商學院畢業約10年后,
I was seated at dinner next to Deborah Gruenfeld, a professor of leadership and organizational behavior at Stanford,
我在一次晚宴上遇到了斯坦福大學研究領導力和組織行為的教授德波拉·格林費爾德,
and our friendly small talk quickly turned into an intense discussion.
我們由愉快的小聲交談很快演變成了熱烈的討論。
Having studied this issue, Professor Gruenfeld was able to explain the price women pay for success.
基于多年的研究,格林費爾德教授非常理解女性為成功付出代價的原因。
"Our entrenched cultural ideas associate men with leadership qualities and women with nurturing qualities and put women in a double bind," she said.
“我們根深蒂固的文化傳統,將男性與領袖特質相關聯,將女性與撫育特質相關聯,并且讓女性處于一個兩難的境地。”她說,
"We believe not only that women are nurturing, but that they should be nurturing above all else.
“我們不僅相信女性充當的是撫育者的角色,還相信這是她們首要的角色。
When a woman does anything that signals she might not be nice first and foremost, it creates a negative impression and makes us uncomfortable."
當一個女人做了某些事情顯示出她最突出的特質不是親和力,就會給人帶來負面印象,讓其他人感覺不舒服。
If a woman is competent, she does not seem nice enough.
如果一個女人非常能干,她看上去就不夠親切;
If a woman seems really nice, she is considered more nice than competent.
如果一個女人看上去很親切,那她就會被認為不夠能干。
Since people want to hire and promote those who are both competent and nice, this creates a huge stumbling block for women.
由于人們想雇用和提拔那些既能干又有親和力的人,這就構成了女性的一大障礙。
Acting in stereotypically feminine ways makes it difficult to reach for the same opportunities as men,
表現得“女性化”讓女性很難像男性那樣獲得機會,
but defying expectations and reaching for those opportunities leads to being judged as undeserving and selfish.
但不顧社會期待去爭取機會又會被認為不配獲得機會,甚至被判定是一種自私的行為。