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And if we want to talk about male victims,
還有如果我們要談男性受害者
let's talk about male victims.
讓我們談談男性受害者
Most male victims of violence are the victims of other men's violence.
很多男性受害者被施暴于其他男性。
So that's something that both women and men have in common.
所以如果男性和女性有些共同點，
We are both victims of men's violence.
我們都是男性暴力下的受害者。
So we have it in our direct self-interest,
所以我們都有各自的目的。
not to mention the fact that most men that I know
事實上不得不說，我們知道很多男人擁有
have women and girls that we care deeply about,
我們關心的女人和女孩子。
in our families and our friendship circles and every other way.
在我們的家庭，我們的朋友圈子還有其他的。
So there's so many reasons why we need men to speak out.
所以有很多原因解釋為什么我們需要男人提出這問題。
It seems obvious saying it out loud. Doesn't it?
這看起來很明顯的需要說出來。不是嗎？
Now, the nature of the work that I do and my colleagues do
現在，我和我的同事正在做的是，
in the sports culture and the U.S. military, in schools,
在傳統的運動和美國軍事和在學校，
we pioneered this approach called the bystander approach
我們帶領著這方略名為“旁觀者策略”
to gender violence prevention.
來防止性別暴力。
And I just want to give you the highlights of the bystander approach,
還有我要特別給你們提出這策略的要點，
because it's a big thematic shift,
因為這是很大的主題改觀，
although there's lots of particulars,
雖然有很多詳細的要點，
but the heart of it is, instead of seeing men as perpetrators
但這中心點是，不僅僅將男人看作施虐者，
and women as victims,
女人是受害者，
or women as perpetrators, men as victims,
或女人是施虐者，男人是受害者，
or any combination in there.
或者任何一個組合。
I'm using the gender binary. I know there's more
我在用著性別兩極化。我知道的我們有的不僅僅是
than men and women, there's more than male and female.
男人和女人。這世上不僅僅有男性和女性。
And there are women who are perpetrators,
還有很多女人是施虐者，
and of course there are men who are victims.
當然還有很多男人是受虐者。
There's a whole spectrum.
這都是一系列的。
But instead of seeing it in the binary fashion,
但是，然而將之當作是性別兩極化，
we focus on all of us as what we call bystanders,
我們注重在于我們就好比稱之為旁觀者，
and a bystander is defined as anybody who is not
在這旁觀者的意思是任何人在任何情況下，
a perpetrator or a victim in a given situation,
如果不屬于施虐者或被虐者，
so in other words friends, teammates, colleagues,
換句話說就是朋友，隊友，同事，
coworkers, family members, those of us
一起工作的，家庭成員，
who are not directly involved in a dyad of abuse,
甚至是不間接有關系的人們，
but we are embedded in social, family, work, school,
但是我們在社交，家庭，工作，學校
and other peer culture relationships with people
和其他同輩傳統關系中與受虐者
who might be in that situation. What do we do?
都是有所關聯的。我們能做什么？
How do we speak up? How do we challenge our friends?
我們該說什么？我們如何挑戰我們的朋友？
How do we support our friends? But how do we not
我們如何支持我們的朋友？我們如何能夠
remain silent in the face of abuse?
在暴力面前不保持沉默？
Now, when it comes to men and male culture,
現在，當我們面對男性的傳統，
the goal is to get men who are not abusive
我們的目的是不暴力男人也要去
to challenge men who are.
挑戰那些施虐的男人。
And when I say abusive, I don't mean just
還有當我說暴力傾向，
men who are beating women.
我不是只說打女人的男人。
We're not just saying a man whose friend
我們不是只說一個男人的朋友
is abusing his girlfriend needs to stop the guy
正在對他女友施暴然后他需
at the moment of attack.
阻止他朋友的施暴行為。
That's a naive way of creating a social change.
這是很幼稚的改變社會的方法。
It's along a continuum, we're trying to get men
這是個長遠的過程，
to interrupt each other.
我們在嘗試讓男人們互相影響。
So, for example, if you're a guy and you're in a group of guys
所以，比方說，如果你是個男人然后和一班男人在
playing poker, talking, hanging out, no women present,
玩撲克牌，談天，逛街，沒有女人在，
and another guy says something sexist or degrading
然后一些男人說一些性別歧視或貶低
or harassing about women,
或侮辱女人的話，
instead of laughing along or pretending you didn't hear it,
與其加入取笑或當做沒聽見，
we need men to say, "Hey, that's not funny.
我們須要男人說：“Hey，這一點都不好笑。
You know, that could be my sister you're talking about,
你知道嗎，你可能是在說著我的姐姐妹妹，
and could you joke about something else?
你們可說些別的笑話嗎？
Or could you talk about something else?
或你們可以說其它話題嗎？
I don't appreciate that kind of talk."
我不贊成這類的話題。”
Just like if you're a white person and another white person
就好象你是白人和另外一個白人
makes a racist comment, you'd hope, I hope,
說個種族歧視的話題，你希望，我也希望，
that white people would interrupt that racist enactment
有個白人會打岔那個話題，
by a fellow white person.
是要來自個白人。
Just like with heterosexism, if you're a heterosexual person
就好象你和異性戀的人一起，如果你是異性戀的人，
and you yourself don't enact harassing or abusive behaviors
即使你不會對擁有不同性取向的人們
towards people of varying sexual orientations,
做出些騷擾或暴力行為，
if you don't say something in the face of other heterosexual people doing that,
如果你不在其他異性戀說些東西時即使打斷，
then, in a sense, isn't your silence
那么，照理來說，你的沉默是不是
a form of consent and complicity?
代表著同意？
