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I told the surprised cabbie my mother's address. "I need to get there as soon as possible."
我把我媽媽的住址告訴了那個一臉驚訝的出租車司機。"我要盡快趕到那里，越快越好。"
"That's in Scottsdale," he complained.
"那可是在菲尼克斯。"他抱怨道。
I threw four twenties over the seat.
我把四張二十美元的鈔票扔到前排座位上。
"Will that be enough?"
“這些夠了嗎？”
"Sure, kid, no problem."
“當然，孩子，沒問題。”
I sat back against the seat, folding my arms across my lap. The familiar city began to rush around me, but I didn't look out the windows. I exerted myself to maintain control. I was determined not to lose myself at this point, now that my plan was successfully completed. There was no point in indulging in more terror, more anxiety. My path was set. I just had to follow it now.
我坐回座位上，雙臂交疊著抱住膝蓋。熟悉的城市開始包圍著我，但我根本不想看出窗外去。我努力讓自己保持自制力。既然我的計劃進行得如此順利，我下定決心不讓自己在這個時候崩潰。讓自己沉浸在更多的恐懼和焦慮中是毫無意義的。我已經選擇了這條路。現在我所能是繼續走下去。
So, instead of panicking, I closed my eyes and spent the twenty minutes' drive with Edward.
所以，我不再惶恐，而是閉上眼睛，用那二十分鐘的車程盡情想著愛德華。
I imagined that I had stayed at the airport to meet Edward. I visualized how I would stand on my toes, the sooner to see his face. How quickly, how gracefully he would move through the crowds of people separating us. And then I would run to close those last few feet between us reckless as always and I would be in his marble arms, finally safe.
我想象著自己留在機場，與愛德華相見。我想象著，自己會怎樣踮起腳尖，想要早些看見他的臉；他會怎樣迅速而又優雅地穿過分隔著我們的擁擠的人群。然后，我會像平常一樣魯莽地沖上前去，走完我們之間的最后幾步，然后落入他大理石般的懷抱。最終，我會平安無恙。
I wondered where we would have gone. North somewhere, so he could be outside in the day. Or maybe somewhere very remote, so we could lay in the sun together again. I imagined him by the shore, his skin sparkling like the sea. It wouldn't matter how long we had to hide. To be trapped in a hotel room with him would be a kind of heaven. So many questions I still had for him. I could talk to him forever, never sleeping, never leaving his side.
我想知道我們將會去那里。也許是北方的某個地方，這樣他就能在白天外出。又或許是某個非常偏遠的地方，這樣我們就能再次躺在陽光下。我想象著他在海灘上的樣子，他的肌膚會像海水一樣閃閃發光。我不在乎我們得躲藏多久。和他一起困住賓館房間里的時光一定宛如天堂。我還有那么多的問題想要問題。我可以一直和他談話，永遠也不睡覺，永遠不離開他身邊。
