評論
打印
Sit down and talk about financial goals and values. Many couples often neglect this step, even if it seems obvious and common-sensical. But because talking about finances can be uncomfortable, they leave these important things unsaid, and often don’t even think about it individually. They have goals and values when it comes to money, but they’re not examined. That’s a mistake, as one person might want to be frugal in order to save for future goals, while the other might like to spend and enjoy things now, while the getting is good. The differences often come from different upbringings, and they can be emotionally charged (see next step for more on this). It doesn’t have to be difficult, though. Just tell your partner you’d like to sit down and have a talk about the future — what your goals are and how you can work together, as a team, to achieve them. In the beginning, just start spitting out different things each of you wants — a house, kids, college education for the kids, a healthy emergency fund, nice cars, travel each year, nice clothes, gadgets and computers, etc. Then start to prioritize, and see if you can come up with things in common. If you want different things, it is important that you talk about why, and consider the other person’s desires. If that’s what makes the other person happy, you should want to make them happy — that’s the basis of a good relationship. But relationships aren’t one-sided, either, so you should be able to be happy too. The point is that both sides should be considered, and you should look for a win-win solution or compromise so that you can both be happy. It might take a few meetings to get to actual written goals, with a timeframe for each, but that’s where you want to be eventually.
1. 坐下來，談?wù)動嘘P(guān)金錢的目標(biāo)和價值所在。
很多夫婦經(jīng)常會忽略這一點，即使它是那么地顯而易見,是常識性的問題。但談?wù)摻疱X卻讓人感覺不舒服，所以他們不把這些重要的東西說出來，他們甚至不單獨(dú)地去思考這么問題。在金錢上，他們有自己的目標(biāo)和價值觀，但他們卻從不細(xì)想。這是錯誤的。因為其中一個人想節(jié)儉點，好存錢來實現(xiàn)將來的目標(biāo)；而另一個卻想著當(dāng)下行樂。這差異通常是由成長經(jīng)歷導(dǎo)致的，也可能是情感上的問題。（詳情請看第二點）然而，這不是什么難題。只要告訴你的另一半你想坐下來，談?wù)勀銈兊膶?--你們的目標(biāo)和怎么共同去實現(xiàn)你們的目標(biāo)。首先，把你們各自想要的東西都說出來---一所房子，孩子，大學(xué)經(jīng)費(fèi)，突發(fā)醫(yī)療基金，靚車，每年旅游一次，衣服，小配件，電腦等等。然后就開始優(yōu)先排列，看看你們是否有哪些是一致的。假如你們想要的都不一樣，那么給出理由是很重要的，并且要考慮一下另一半的欲望。如果那能取悅另一半，你就得那樣做---這是感情好的基礎(chǔ)所在。但感情也不是單方面的，所以你也得樂于那么做。重點是雙方都要考慮，并且要找到一個雙贏的解決之道，又或者是作出讓步，這樣才能皆大歡喜。在寫目標(biāo)，制定時間之前，很可能需要多次交談，但這也正是你們最終會經(jīng)歷的一步。
