His nom de guerre, Duch, meant the schoolboy who stood up when his master asked him to. He may have hated the prison work, but he faithfully repeated the slogans. “Our party makes absolutely no mistakes.” “Angkar knows who is good and who is bad.” They did not quite smother the rising fear that his perpetual system might swallow him, too. Was he sorry? In 1999, when a journalist found him, he wanted to talk. By then he had become a Christian, another ideology in which he could immerse himself. He knew about sins and forgiveness now.
他的假名杜赫是指那個在主人要求時就站起來的學生。他可能討厭監獄工作，但他忠實地重復了口號。“我們的黨絕對不會犯錯。“柬共知道誰是好人，誰是壞人。”他們并沒有完全消除心中升起的恐懼，擔心他那永久的系統也會把他吞沒。他感到抱歉嗎？1999年，當一個記者找到他時，他想和他談談。那時他已經成為一名基督徒，這是另一種他可以沉浸其中的意識形態。杜赫現在知道了罪惡和寬恕。
Occasionally he shed tears. He was the first high Khmer Rouge official to go on trial, in 2009. There, often dressed in pure white, his soft voice demanding exact dates and transcripts, he explained himself. But what he said one day he might retract the next. He played with truth, as he had done before. Uniquely among Khmer Rouge leaders, he accepted responsibility for his actions at S-21. But his superiors had given the orders, so he was bound to obey. And he hoped, having been useful, that he might be released. He was not. In 2012 his original sentence of 35 years for torture, murder and crimes against humanity was extended to life.
他偶爾會流淚。2009年，他成為第一個接受審判的紅色高棉高級官員。在那里，他常常穿著純白的衣服，用他柔和的聲音要求對方說出確切的日期和筆錄，然后交代罪行。但他今天說的話，可能第二天就會收回。他像以前一樣玩弄真相。在紅色高棉領導人中，他是獨一無二的，他為自己在S-21監獄的行為承擔了責任。但是他的上司下達了命令，所以他必須服從。他曾發揮作用，希望自己可以被釋放。結果并沒有。2012年，他最初因酷刑、謀殺和反人類罪被判35年徒刑，后來被延長至終身監禁。
He was not surprised, or did not let it show. He had learned young the most pertinent of Khmer Rouge mottoes for him, “Extinguish your heart.” And he had not thrown off the motivations of those days. Given the chance, he would discuss Marxism for hours. He clung tightly, too, to his nom de guerre. “Kaing Guek Eav” was the quiet teacher’s name he could have reverted to. But “Duch” was still who he was, the diligent boy who pleased his master. And wrote daily, for years, above that name, “Smash.” “Keep.” “Grind to dust.”
杜赫一點也不驚訝，或者說沒有表現出來。他年輕時就學會了紅色高棉最符合自己的格言：“熄滅你的心。”他沒有拋棄那些日子的動力。如果有機會，他會花好幾個小時討論馬克思主義。他也緊抓著自己的假名不放。“康克由”是他可以回到那個安靜的老師的名字。但“杜赫”仍然是他自己，那個勤快、討主人喜歡的男孩。多年來，每天都在這個名字上寫下“粉碎”。”“保持。“化為塵土。”
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