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How to Annoy Your Co-workers
怎樣惹怒同事
1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17-inch paper, 99 copies.
1. 將復(fù)印機設(shè)置為縮印一半的大小，加黑，A3紙，復(fù)印99份。
2. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
2. 在任何天氣情況下都開著前風(fēng)擋雨刷，好讓它隨時“在調(diào)試中”。
3. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
3. 對別人說的事都報以“這只是你的想法”的回答。
4. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
4. 用“根據(jù)預(yù)言所說”來結(jié)束你所有的發(fā)言。
5. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
5. 用雙手使勁捂住耳朵來暗示談話該結(jié)束了。
6. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
6. 把紙張從中間裝訂起來。
7. Ask your co-workers what gender they are.
7. 問同事們他們的性別。
8. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
8. 做陳述的過程中，不時地像鸚鵡一樣點點頭。
9. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. 練習(xí)發(fā)出傳真機和“貓”的聲音。
10. During meetings, disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
10. 開會時，拆開你的筆，“不小心”把筆芯彈出來。
11. ALWAYS TYPE WITH CAPS-LOCK ON
11. 全部用大寫字母打出
12. type only in lower case
12. 全部用小寫字母打出
13. Don'tuseanypunctuationeither
13. 不要使用標點符號或空格
14. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook.
14. 問同事們詭秘的問題，然后把他們的回答記在小本子上。
15. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
15. 嘟嘟囔囔一些諸如“心理側(cè)面圖”之類的東西。
