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I had a black dog. His name was Depression.
我有一條黑狗，它名叫抑郁。
Whenever the black dog made an appearance, I felt empty and life just seemed to slow down.
每當(dāng)這條黑狗出現(xiàn)時(shí)，我就感到空虛，生活似乎也慢了下來(lái)。
He could surprise me with the visit for no reason or occasion.
它總會(huì)不分時(shí)間、場(chǎng)合的突然出現(xiàn)在我的面前。
The black dog made me look and feel older than my years.
黑狗讓我看起來(lái)感覺(jué)像是一個(gè)老人。
When the rest of the world seemed to be enjoying life, I could only see it through the black dog.
當(dāng)整個(gè)世界好像都在享受生活，我卻只能與黑狗相伴。
Activities that usually brought me pleasure suddenly ceased to.
那些曾帶給我快樂(lè)的事情，忽然消失了。
He liked to ruin my appetite. He chewed up my memory and my ability to concentrate.
它喜歡讓我失去食欲，它蠶食掉我的記憶力和集中精力的能力。
Doing anything or going anywhere with black dog required superhuman strength.
拖著這條黑狗，無(wú)論去哪里或者做什么，都需要超人的力量。
At social occasions, he would sniff out what confidence I had and chase it away.
在社交場(chǎng)合，它總會(huì)找出我的自信，將其趕走。
My biggest fear was being found out; I worried that people would judge me.
我最害怕的是被人知道，我擔(dān)心別人會(huì)議論我。
Because of the shame and stigma of the black dog, I was constantly worried about being found out.
由于黑狗帶來(lái)的羞愧和恥辱，我總是擔(dān)心被人知道。
So I invested a vast amount of energy into covering him up.
所以我投入很多精力把它藏起來(lái)。
Keeping up an emotional life is exhausting!
掩藏情緒的生活讓人精疲力竭！
Black dog could make me think or say negative things.
黑狗讓我消極的思考和言談。
He could make me irritable and difficult to be around.
它讓我煩躁不安，難于相處。
He would take my love and bury my intimacy.
它奪走了我的愛(ài)，埋藏了我的溫情。
He loved nothing more than to wake me up with highly repetitive negative thinking.
它最愛(ài)在半夜把我喚醒，心中只有那些一直重復(fù)的消極念頭。
He also liked to remind me how exhausted I was going to be the next day.
它還喜歡提醒我將會(huì)面對(duì)多么心力交瘁的一天。
Having a black dog in your life is not so much about feeling a bit down, sad or blue.
生活中有一條黑狗，不僅僅是感到一點(diǎn)低落、悲傷或者憂郁。
At its worst, it is about being devoid of feeling altogether.
最糟糕的時(shí)候，所有的感覺(jué)都會(huì)失去。
As I grew older, black dog got bigger and he started hanging around all the time.
我一天天的變老，黑狗一天天的長(zhǎng)大，它開(kāi)始不離我的左右。
I chased them off with whatever I thought might send him running.
我用盡了一切辦法，想把它趕走。
But more often than not, he would come out on top.
但獲勝的往往是它。
Going down became easier than getting up again.
和重新站起來(lái)相比，躺倒變得更容易。
So I became rather good at self medication which never really helped.
所以我成了給自己開(kāi)藥的專家，但從未真的有效過(guò)。
Eventually I felt totally isolated from everything and everyone.
最后，我感到自己和整個(gè)世界所有人失去了聯(lián)系。
The black dog had finally succeeded in hijacking my life.
黑狗終于成功綁架了我的生活。
When you lose all joy in life, you can begin to question what the point of it is.
當(dāng)生活不再有絲毫快樂(lè)，你就開(kāi)始質(zhì)疑生活的意義。
Thankfully this was time when I sought professional help.
幸運(yùn)的是，那個(gè)時(shí)候我尋求了專業(yè)的幫助。
This was my first step towards recovery and a major turning point in my life.
那是我邁向康復(fù)的第一步，也是我生命的一個(gè)轉(zhuǎn)折點(diǎn)。
I learnt that it does not matter who you are, the black dog affects millions and millions of people. It is an equal opportunity mongrel.
我了解到無(wú)論是誰(shuí)，無(wú)數(shù)的人都在被這條黑狗所侵?jǐn)_，任何人都機(jī)會(huì)遇見(jiàn)這條雜種狗。
I also learnt that there was no silver bullet or magic pill.
我還了解到不存在萬(wàn)能靈藥或魔法藥丸。
Medication can help some and others might need different approach altogether.
藥物對(duì)部分人有幫助，其它人還要輔以另外的手段。
I also learnt that being emotionally genuine or authentic to those who close to you can be an absolute game changer.
我還了解到，向親近的人表達(dá)出自己的真實(shí)感情能起到關(guān)鍵的療效。
Most importantly I learnt not to be afraid of black dog and taught him a few tricks of my own.
最重要的是，我學(xué)會(huì)不再害怕黑狗，甚至向它耍了一些自己的花招。
The more tired and stressed you are the louder he barks.
你越是疲勞和緊張，它就叫的越兇。
So it is important to learn how to quiet your mind.
所以學(xué)會(huì)讓自己平靜下來(lái)很重要。
It's been clinically proven that regular exercise can be as effective for treating mild to moderate depression as antidepressants.
臨床證明，經(jīng)常鍛煉對(duì)于緩解輕/中度抑郁的效果不比抗抑郁藥差。
So go for a walk or run and leave the mutt behind.
所以去走走，去跑步吧，把這條雜種狗甩在后面。
Keep a mood journal; getting your thoughts on paper can be cathartic and often insightful.
記一份情緒日記，把想法寫在紙上是種宣泄，往往也有助于看清問(wèn)題。
Also keep track of the things you have to be grateful for.
也記錄下那些值得感恩的事情。
The most important thing to remember is that no matter how bad it gets, if you take right steps, talk to the right people, black dog days can and will pass.
最重要的是要記住，不管情況變得多么糟糕，只要你走向正確的方向，找適當(dāng)?shù)娜私涣鳎诠方蹬R的日子一定會(huì)過(guò)去。
I wouldn't say that I am grateful for the black dog. But he has been an incredible teacher.
我不會(huì)說(shuō)我感謝這條黑狗，但它卻是個(gè)神奇的老師。
He forced me to re-evaluate and simplify my life.
它迫使我重新認(rèn)識(shí)生活，讓它變得更簡(jiǎn)單。
I learnt that rather than running away from my problems, it is better to embrace them.
我認(rèn)識(shí)到與其逃避我的問(wèn)題，不如迎接它們。
The black dog may always be a part of my life. But he would never be the beast that it was.
黑狗也許將永遠(yuǎn)是我生命的一部分，但它再不會(huì)是以前的那只野獸了。
We have an understanding.
我們達(dá)成了理解。
I've learnt through knowledge, patience, discipline and humour, the worst black dog can be made to heel.
通過(guò)學(xué)習(xí)知識(shí)、耐心、克制和幽默，最兇狠的黑狗也可以被制伏。
If you are in difficulty, never be afraid to ask for help.
假如你身處困境，一定不要害怕求助。
There is absolutely no shame in doing so; the only shame is missing out of life.
這樣做一點(diǎn)都不丟人，只有錯(cuò)過(guò)生活才是遺憾。
