評論
打印
I am a father
我是一名父親
BY BILLY MERRIFIELD
文/比利·梅里菲爾德
(The caption for the page and half photograph accompanying this items says)
（本文附一張一頁半的插圖，說明文字如下）
MERRIFIELD, 43, a captain with the Rio Arriba County sheriff's office in New Mexico, visiting the grave of his daughter Brandi on Feb.4.
2月4日，43歲的梅里·菲爾德，新墨西哥州里奧阿里巴縣治安官辦公室的隊長，去了他女兒布蘭迪的墳前祭奠她。
She died from a heroin overdose at age 22.
她22歲時過量攝入毒品去世。
(BILLY MERRIFIELD WRITES)AS MY DAUGHTER STARTED GETTING older, in high school, the boyfriend thing came around.
（正文如下）我女兒逐漸長大成人，高中時，談戀愛的問題出現了。
She ended up meeting one of these guys who was a user.
最后，她和一個吸毒的在一起了。
And of course, once she hit 18, it was kind of difficult to give her direction.
當然了，成年之后，你要再想讓她聽話就難了。
Anytime I confronted her, she would deny it.
每次我問起她，她都會否認。
I mean, she was always telling me, "Dad, I made a mistake. I don't need help. I tried it a few times. I'm going to stay away from it."
她總跟我說，“爸爸，我是犯了一個錯誤。但我不需要幫助。我只試了幾次。我戒了就是了。”
That was her constant: "Trust me, Dad, I can fight this. I can beat it."
她總說：“相信我，爸爸，我能扛過去的。我能戒掉。”
I remember telling her one day, "I'm to the point that I'm preparing myself for getting a bad phone call about you."
記得，有一次，我對她說，“我已經到了要做好哪天接到電話被告知你遭遇不測的準備的地步了。”
So I kind of prepared myself for it.
所以我也算是做了一些心理準備。
You can be as mentally and physically tough as you want to be.
無論你想把自己的身心變得多強大，你都能做到。
I think I've seen a lot.
我以為我見過的世面已經夠多了。
I've probably seen a lot more than a lot of people.
我見過的世面可能比很多人都要大得多。
And I've experienced a ton.
我也經歷了很多。
You can't prepare for it, though.
但你還是做不好準備。
When it comes to your own child, I cannot express the feeling and the loss.
這件事發生在自己孩子身上時，那種感受，那種失落是無以言表的。
It never gets easier.
你永遠都無法走出傷痛。
Because that void will always be there.
因為那個缺失永遠都抹不去。
Our children are supposed to bury us—we're not supposed to bury them.
本應該是黑發人送白發人，而不應該是白發人送黑發人。
譯文由可可原創，僅供學習交流使用，未經許可請勿轉載。
