評論
打印
(Man) Fisher, pick up. Fisher, 菲莎,快接電話
it's me! Fisher, pick up! 是我啊,快接電話
I'm late, come on, come on. I need to bounce some ideas off you. 我要跟你談談我那個專欄
Mine are all boring, done it, been there. 老是舊調重彈,會悶……
Hey, Ike! 艾基
When are you guys gonna stop waking me up every morning? 可以不再每天清早把我吵醒嗎?
When your column stops putting me to sleep. 你的專欄不再令我打瞌睡就可以
- Funny, funny. - Yo, Jonah! 你真會說笑
Fisher, come on! Are you really not there? 菲莎,你真的不在嗎?
All right, cool. I'll talk to you later. 好,給我回電吧
Excuse me. I'm thinking of doing an article about limousines. 我想寫一篇關于汽車的專欄
What do you think about people who've never been in one? 未坐過汽車的人會有什么感受?
I don't know people like that. 未坐過汽車的人我倒從未見過
I need someone to bounce some ideas off of and get the juices flowing. 我只是想聽取一些意見
I got one hour, 27 minutes, 52 seconds. 1個鐘頭27分52秒就要交稿
- When your T-shirts stop shrinking. 等你賣的T恤不再縮水啦
Hey, Ike! When are you gonna put me in a column? 你幾時才在專欄寫我啊?
- (Woman) Shrinks? 縮水?
He's just kidding. -Oh, forget it. 他說笑而已
-Funny. He's kidding. 說得妙
- Here, give me $5. 來,五塊錢吧
Give me $2. - (Woman) No way. 兩塊錢
Folks, I got nice shirts here. 各位,我的T恤很精美
"I love everybody. You're next." “我肯跟大家好,下一個輪到你”
Look! 看啊……
So what's in store for us in tomorrow's column? 你明天的專欄談什么?
(Groans) I don't know yet. I'm, uh, kind of a last-minute man. 我還未知道 我要等到最后一分鐘才行事的
You know, till an hour or two before deadline, I don't get any ideas. 截稿前一個小時我還未有題材
So you get your ideas for your column from life. 那你專欄的題材是來自生活片段
Start up a conversation with a woman in a bar. 例如在酒吧向女人搭訕
Attack her dart playing 批評她只會擲飛鏢
and try to get a rise out of her... 在她沉思時故意觸怒她
while you contemplate whether or not she's worth hitting on. 或者看看能否搭上她
No, I can't hit on you till I get an idea. 我未有題材前連你也不想搭上
Wh-- That's flattering. 你倒很口甜舌滑
(Ike) No, you don't understand. 不,你搞不清楚了
I understand. See, 我搞得很清楚
my not responding to you baiting me... 我不肯讓你搭上我
will inspire one of those bitter diatribes you like to write about women. 會令你在專欄里大肆抨擊女性
(Ike)I don't write bitter diatribes about women. 抨擊女性的文章嘛
- Oh-ho. - Very often. 我是很少寫的
I could. 其實我也懂得寫
Only when the ideas aren't flowing, huh? 只是在思路不通暢時才抨擊吧?
It's so nice to meet you, one-minute man. 一分鐘先生,幸會了
It's last-minute man. 是最后一分鐘,別混淆啊
Whatever. 隨你怎樣說吧
Want to hear something funny? For a good-looking guy, you strike out a lot.Have you noticed that? 你樣貌一流,但泡妞九流
- I bet it's your ex-wife. - (Man) Excuse me. 一定是你前妻打來的
I've seen much worse. 更糟的我都見過
(Bartender) No, Ike's not here. 艾基不在這里
I say, I've seen much worse. 我剛說,更糟的我都見過
- I'll tell him when he comes in. - Excuse me? 你說什么?
The brush-off. 拂袖而去
I've witnessed far more... treacherous and nefarious exits than that. 我親眼見過離開時更兇的樣子
At least she castigated you in private. 至少她只是私下斥責你
Not as private as I thought. 連你都聽到就不算私下斥責了
Kevin, you got some napkins there? 有紙巾嗎?
- Wiping or writing? 用來抹嘴抑或寫搞?
They love you. They hate you. 女人敢愛敢恨
- I'll let you know. 遲些才讓你知吧
They're hot. They're cold. 女人忽冷忽熱
They're high.They're up. 情緒有起有落
This is fun making a list with you, 說得真妙
They're down. 情緒有起有落
but I do have a column to write. 可是我還得趕寫專欄
Ike. 艾基
But you have yet to find a really superb idea. 你總得找個妙絕人寰的題材才行
There's a girl from my hometown that you could write about. 可以寫一寫我家鄉的一個少女
Excuse me, but we don't need any ideas. 我們不需要什么題材的
She likes to dump grooms at the altar. 她在教堂行婚禮的圣壇丟棄新郎
They call her the "Runaway Bride." 所以大家稱她為“逃跑新娘”
She's performed the travesty seven or eight times. 她做這種怪事做七、八次了
