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Four days after Christmas, Amy Rose let herself into the apartment. She discovered Patrick's body on the living-room couch. Patrick Bissell was dead of an overdose of cocaine and other drugs. He had just turned 30.
圣誕節后的第四天，埃米·羅斯走進公寓，在起居室的沙發上發現了帕特里克的尸體。帕特里克·比斯爾死于過量吸食可卡因和其他毒品。他年僅30歲。
Patricia Bissell's voice breaks as she speaks of a death notice for her son in The New York Times. Beneath the name Bissell, it simply states: "Good night, sweet prince."
帕特里夏·比斯爾在提到《紐約時報》上有關她兒子的訃告時泣不成聲。在比斯爾的名字下，訃告上簡單地寫著：晚安，可愛的芭蕾王子。
It is impossible to say what, if anything, could have saved Patrick Bissell once he had begun his long dance of death. His mother, realizing that her assessment runs counter to some expert wisdom, offers a powerful insight:
我們也不能斷定在帕特里克·比斯爾開始他漫長的死亡之舞時，還有什么能夠挽救他。他母親覺得自己的看法與某些專家相悖，于是發表了她深刻而有力的見解：
We are quick to blame such tragedies on others—on peer pressure, stressful occupations, drug dealers, everyone except ourselves. But most of these problems begin at home, when children are being brought up. It is hard for me to admit this, but I failed to nurture in Patrick the self-esteem he needed to deal with life. No matter how well he did, he felt that he had failed. He used drugs because they allowed him to escape that feeling. When we come to understand and accept this aspect of addiction, maybe we can do something about it.
“我們急于把此類悲劇歸咎給他人——歸罪給同輩的壓力、壓力大的職業、毒品販子，埋怨每個人，就是不愿意責怪自身。可是這些問題大多起源于家庭，起源于孩子的成長過程。我很難承認這一點，但是我確實沒能在兒子身上培養他面對生活的自尊。無論他曾經表現得如何出色，他總是覺得自己失敗了。他吸食毒品，因為毒品能使他逃避這種感覺。當我們漸漸了解并接受他吸毒成癮的原因時，也許有些事是我們可以做的?！?/p>
