評(píng)論
打印
What followed is a nine-year period that can best be titled as "Denial and Running."
接下來(lái)的九年，可以被稱作：“否認(rèn)和逃避”。
When I got a chance to identify the real torment that I caused, I didn't stand still long enough to do so.
當(dāng)我有機(jī)會(huì)去認(rèn)識(shí)到，由我引起的真實(shí)的痛苦時(shí)，我并沒(méi)能足夠冷靜地去面對(duì)。
Whether it be via distraction, substance use,
無(wú)論是通過(guò)分散注意力，濫用藥物，
thrill-seeking or the scrupulous policing of my inner speak, I refused to be static and silent.
尋求刺激，或者是，小心謹(jǐn)慎地關(guān)注我內(nèi)心的想法，我拒絕，保持冷靜和沉默。
And with this noise, I also drew heavily upon other parts of my life to construct a picture of who I was.
除了這個(gè)“噪音”之外，我還不斷地拼湊我生活中的其他部分，來(lái)解答“我是誰(shuí)”這個(gè)問(wèn)題。
I was a surfer, a social science student, a friend to good people, a loved brother and son,
我是一個(gè)沖浪運(yùn)動(dòng)員，一個(gè)學(xué)習(xí)社會(huì)科學(xué)的學(xué)生，一些好人的朋友，一個(gè)被愛(ài)著的兄弟和兒子，
an outdoor recreation guide, and eventually, a youth worker.
一本“戶外娛樂(lè)指南”，最終，也是一個(gè)青年工作者。
I gripped tight to the simple notion that I wasn't a bad person.
我堅(jiān)持認(rèn)為，我并不是一個(gè)壞人。
I didn't think I had this in my bones. I thought I was made up of something else.
我并不認(rèn)為，我天生就是這樣的人。我想，我本應(yīng)該是另一個(gè)樣子。
In my nurtured upbringing, my loving extended family and role models,
在對(duì)我的培養(yǎng)和教育中，我充滿愛(ài)的家人和榜樣，
people close to me were warm and genuine in their respect shown towards women.
我身邊的人們，都尊重女性，對(duì)待女性都溫暖而真誠(chéng)。
It took me a long time to stare down this dark corner of myself, and to ask it questions.
我花了很長(zhǎng)時(shí)間，才能面對(duì)我自身的這個(gè)黑暗角落，并開(kāi)始發(fā)問(wèn)。
