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The ride to the hospital took about 20 minutes.
坐車去醫院大概用了20分鐘。
The double doors of the ambulance opened to the sunlight, and from there it was straight to the emergency room, where, for the next eight hours, I kept dying.
救護車的兩扇門向陽光敞開，從那里直接到急診室，在接下來的8個小時里，我一直昏迷。
I would flatline, someone would do CPR, and they'd pull me back from the abyss.
我的心電圖會變平，有人會給我做心肺復蘇，他們就把我從深淵中拉回來。
They did this over and over. People had to keep rotating because keeping me alive was exhausting.
他們反復地做著心肺復蘇。人們不得不輪番看護，因為讓我活著非常累人。
At the same time, the orthopedic-trauma team was debriding my insides—cleaning out the gravel and rocks and debris.
與此同時，骨科創傷小組正在清理我的內臟，清理碎石、巖石和碎片。
My stomach was ripped open, my backside was ripped open, my pelvic bone was severed.
我的腹部被撕開，背部被撕開，骨盆骨斷開了。
The pelvis holds up all the vital organs, so when it's compromised, internal hemorrhaging doesn't stop.
骨盆支撐著所有的重要器官，所以當骨盆斷開后，內部出血不止。
On top of that, my left femoral artery was severed. The blood would run through me and right out again, over and over.
除此之外，我的左股動脈被斷開了。血液會一次又一次地流過我的全身，然后流出來。
Our bodies hold roughly ten pints of blood. That day, I went through 78 pints—eight bodies' worth.
我們的身體大約有十品脫的血液。那天，有78品脫的血在我身體流過-足足是八個人的血量。
At times, I had lost so much blood that there was nothing left for my heart to pump.
有時，我會失血過多，以至于心臟都沒有血可以跳動輸送了。
Twelve hours after I'd left for work that morning, I was stable enough that Sean was allowed to see me in the ICU.
距那天早上我出發去工作12小時后，我的情況已經比較穩定，醫生允許肖恩去重癥監護室看我。
I had tubes running into my nose and mouth. I was bloodied and swollen. My belly was so distended that I looked like I was pregnant with triplets.
我的鼻子和嘴都被插著管子。我渾身是血，全身腫脹。我的肚子脹得像懷了三胞胎一樣。
Sean gingerly took my cut-up hand in his. He had been by my side for only a minute when a nurse saw red fluids staining my gown again.
肖恩小心翼翼地把我受傷的手握在他的手里。他在我身邊只待了一分鐘，護士就看到我的手術服又被紅色液體弄臟了。
"You need to leave. We have to keep working on her. Now!" she said firmly.
護士堅決地說道，“你需要離開。我們得繼續看護她。現在！”
He kissed my forehead and said a quick prayer before being ushered back to the visitors' lounge.
在被推到訪客的休息室之前，他吻了我的額頭，快速地做了一個祈禱。
With the odds stacked against me, the doctors decided to place me in an induced coma,
由于我的存活幾率不大，醫生們決定讓我進入誘導性昏迷狀態，
a lifesaving step that slows down brain function and reduces swelling in order to prevent or lessen brain damage.
這是拯救生命的一個措施，它可以減緩腦功能，減少腫脹，目的是為了避免或減少腦損傷。
During this period, I was in and out of surgery several times. Once, I woke up just as the surgeon was starting to operate on me.
在此期間，我反復幾次進出手術室。有一次，我醒來時，剛好醫生要開始給我做手術。
I saw a bright light and masked faces hovering over me. I remember my chest rising and falling, but I couldn't take a breath.
我看到一束亮光和戴面具的臉龐在我上方移動。我記得我的胸上下起伏，但是我不能呼吸。
As I woke, the pain hit hard, but I couldn't move or communicate no matter how hard I tried.
我醒來時，痛得很厲害。但是，不管我有多努力我都不能移動或者交流。
Well, except for my fingers. "Her fingers are moving," someone in the room said.
除了我的指頭。房間中有個人說，“她的手指在動。”
"There's no way her fingers could be moving. She's out," someone else said. I'm right here! I wanted to scream. I can hear you!
另外一個人說，“她的手指不可能動。她已經昏迷了。”我想大喊，我就在這里！我能聽到你們說話！
"Maybe she's having a seizure." Then another masked face appeared right in front of my face, and I remember a strange smell, and then everything went dark again.
“或許是她癲癇發作了。”然后另一個戴面具的臉龐出現在我的臉的正上方。我聞到了奇怪的味道，然后一切又變得黑暗。
They wrote "mild seizure" on my chart. People have the wrong idea about what a medically induced coma is.
他們在我的病歷上寫道“輕度癲癇”。人們不知道誘導性昏迷是什么情況。
They think it means you're totally unconscious, unable to see or hear or respond in any way.
他們認為，這種狀態意味著你完全沒有意識，不能看到、聽到或者以任何方式做出反應。
But that's not how it is. For weeks after the trauma, I felt like I was locked in a nightmare, imprisoned in my body.
但是事情并不是這樣的。創傷四周后，我感覺我被鎖到了一個夢魘里，被囚禁在自己的身體里。
Sometimes I was unconscious, but other times I existed in a state that has no easy comparison.
有時我是沒有意識的，但是其他時候，我處于在一個不容易做出判斷的狀態。
I couldn't focus on anyone or anything, but I could hear sounds and feel sensations.
我不能專注于任何人或任何事情，但是我能聽到聲音，有感覺。
I was so hot all the time that it felt as if my body were on fire.
我每時每刻都感覺太熱了，感覺就像是我的身體著火了一樣。
I began having thoughts that were almost hallucinations about lying in a pool of water.
我開始出現幾乎是幻覺的關于躺在一池水上的想法。
