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讀者文摘:九則引人思考的笑話(2)

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Four. A doctor walks into the examining room and puts his hand on his patient's shoulder.

一位醫生走進檢查室,把他的手放在他病人的肩膀上。
"I'm afraid I have some bad news. You're dying, and you don't have much time left." "Oh no!" says the patient.
“恐怕我有一些壞消息。你快死了,你所剩時間已經不多。”這個病人說,“奧,不!”
"How long do I have to live?" "Ten," says the doctor. "Ten?" cries the panicked patient.
“我還能活多長時間?”醫生說,“十。”驚慌的病人喊道,“十?”
"Ten what? Days? Weeks? Months?" The doctor calmly replies, "Nine ..."
“多久?十天?十周還是十個月?”醫生平靜地回答,“九...”
In other words ...Life is short—and getting shorter every day. Might as well grab a Krispy Kreme.
換言之...生命是短暫的,而且一天比一天短。還不如吃點甜甜圈。
Five. "See that kid?" a barber says to his customer during a haircut, pointing to a 12-year-old standing outside the barbershop.
“看到那個小孩了嗎?”理發師指著站在理發店外面的一個12歲的小孩對他的顧客說。
"He is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch. I'll prove it to you."
“他是世界上最笨的孩子。看著。我來證明給你看。”
The barber takes out a one-dollar bill and a five-dollar bill, then calls the boy inside.
理發師拿出一張一美元的鈔票和一張五美元的鈔票,然后把男孩叫了進去。
He holds out both bills and asks, "Which one do you want?" The kid takes the one-dollar bill and leaves the shop.
他拿出兩張鈔票,問道:“你想要哪一張?”孩子拿著一美元離開了商店。
"See?" the barber says, laughing. "The dumbest kid in the world."
“看見了嗎?”理發師笑著說。“世界上最傻的孩子。”
The customer leaves the barber-shop and spots the boy coming out of an ice cream store.
顧客離開理發店,看見一個男孩從一家冰淇淋店出來。
He says, "If you don't mind my asking, son, why didn't you take the five-dollar bill?"
他說:“如果你不介意我問的話,孩子,你為什么不拿那5美元呢?”
The boy takes a lick of his ice creamcone and says, "Because the day I choose the five, the game is over."
小男孩舔了舔冰淇淋,說:“因為我選五美元的那天,游戲就結束了。”
In other words...A fool and his money are soon parted. Just be sure you know which one of you is the fool.
換言之...傻瓜和他的錢很快就會分開。只是要確定你們中誰是傻瓜。

九則引人思考的笑話(2).png

Six. It was the morning of Black Friday, and there was a big sale at the electronics superstore.

那是黑色星期五的早晨,電子產品超級市場正在大減價。
People lined up outside at 5 a.m. At about 7:30, there was a huge commotion when a short guy in khaki pants tried working his way to the front of the line.
早上5點,人們在外面排隊。七點半左右,一個穿卡其褲的小個子男人試圖擠到隊伍的最前面,引起了一陣巨大的騷動。
He didn't get very far before the mob grabbed him, wrestled him out of line, and threw him into the parking lot.
他沒走多遠,就被民眾抓住了,把他從隊伍里拽了出來,扔進了停車場。
The little guy got up, brushed himself off, and tried again.
這個小個子站了起來,撣了撣身上的灰塵,又試了一次。
He was barely able to take another step before an even bigger mob attacked him and threw him out of the line again.
他幾乎沒能再走一步,就有一群更大的民眾攻擊了他,把他扔出了隊伍。
Undeterred, the guy got up and started limping toward the front of the line a third time.
這家伙毫不氣餒,站起身來,第三次一瘸一拐地朝隊伍前面走去。
"Are you nuts?" asked one of the red-faced mob members. "Don't you know you're just gonna get tossed out of line again?"
“你瘋了嗎?”一個紅著臉的民眾問道。“你不知道你又要被趕出隊伍了嗎?”
"Yeah, I know," the man replied. "But if you don't let me get to the front of the line, I'll never be able to open the store."
這個男人回答,“是的,我知道。“但是如果你們不讓我去到隊伍的前面,我將永遠沒法開店。”
In other words ...Your mother was right: Just because everyone else is doing it doesn't mean you should be too.
換言之...你母親是對的:僅僅因為其他人都在這么做,并不意味著你也應該這么做。

重點單詞   查看全部解釋    
orderly ['ɔ:dəli]

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adj. 有秩序的,整齊的,一絲不茍的,和平的

 
senior ['si:njə]

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adj. 年長的,高級的,資深的,地位較高的

聯想記憶
commotion [kə'məuʃən]

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n. 騷動,暴亂,喧鬧

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toss [tɔs]

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n. 投擲,震蕩
v. 投擲,搖蕩,輾轉

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shoulder ['ʃəuldə]

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n. 肩膀,肩部
v. 扛,肩負,承擔,(用肩

 
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