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And we perfect, most dangerously, our children. Let me tell you what we think about children.
我們想要讓我們的孩子變得完美，這是最危險的。讓我告訴你我們是如何看待孩子的。
They're hardwired for struggle when they get here. And when you hold those perfect little babies in your hand, our job is not to say, "Look at her, she's perfect.
從他們出生的那刻起，他們就注定要掙扎。當你把這些完美的寶寶抱在懷里的時候，我們的任務不是說：“看看她，她完美的無可挑剔。
My job is just to keep her perfect -- make sure she makes the tennis team by fifth grade and Yale by seventh."
而是確保她保持完美--保證她五年級的時候可以進網球隊，七年級的時候穩進耶魯。”
That's not our job. Our job is to look and say, "You know what? You're imperfect, and you're wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging."
那不是我們的任務。我們的任務是注視著她，對她說，“你知道嗎？你并不完美，你注定要奮斗，但你值得被愛，值得享有歸屬感。”
That's our job. Show me a generation of kids raised like that, and we'll end the problems, I think, that we see today.
這才是我們的職責。給我看用這種方式培養出來的一代孩子，我保證我們今天有的問題會得到解決。
We pretend that what we do doesn't have an effect on people. We do that in our personal lives.
我們假裝我們的行為不會影響他人。不僅在我們個人生活中我們這么做，
We do that corporate -- whether it's a bailout, an oil spill ... a recall.
在工作中也一樣--無論是緊急救助，石油泄漏，還是產品召回。
We pretend like what we're doing doesn't have a huge impact on other people.
我們假裝我們做的事對他人不會造成什么大影響。
I would say to companies, this is not our first rodeo, people.
我想對這些公司說：嘿，這不是我們第一次牛仔競技。
We just need you to be authentic and real and say ... "We're sorry. We'll fix it."
我們只要你坦誠地，真心地說一句：“對不起，我們會處理這個問題。”
But there's another way, and I'll leave you with this. This is what I have found:
但還有一種方法，我把它留給你們。這是我的心得：
To let ourselves be seen, deeply seen, vulnerably seen ... to love with our whole hearts, even though there's no guarantee --
卸下我們的面具，讓我們被看見，深入地被看見，即便是脆弱的一面；全心全意地去愛，盡管沒有任何擔保--
and that's really hard, and I can tell you as a parent, that's excruciatingly difficult --
這是最困難的，我也可以告訴你，作為一名家長，這個非常非常困難--
to practice gratitude and joy in those moments of terror, when we're wondering, "Can I love you this much?
帶著一顆感恩的心，保持快樂，哪怕是在最恐懼的時候，哪怕我們懷疑：“我能不能愛得這么深？
Can I believe in this this passionately? Can I be this fierce about this?"
我能不能如此熱情地相信這份感情？我能不能如此矢志不渝？”
just to be able to stop and, instead of catastrophizing what might happen, to say, "I'm just so grateful, because to feel this vulnerable means I'm alive."
在消極的時候能打住，而不是一味地幻想事情會如何變得更糟，對自己說：“我已經很感恩了，因為能感受到這種脆弱，這意味著我還活著。”
And the last, which I think is probably the most important, is to believe that we're enough.
最后，還有最重要的一點，那就是相信我們已經做得夠好了。
Because when we work from a place, I believe, that says, "I'm enough" ...
因為我相信當我們在一個，讓人覺得“我已經足夠了”的環境中打拼的時候...
then we stop screaming and start listening, we're kinder and gentler to the people around us, and we're kinder and gentler to ourselves.
我們會停止抱怨，開始傾聽，我們會對周圍的人會更友善，更溫和，對自己也會更友善，更溫和。
That's all I have. Thank you.
這就是我演講的全部內容。謝謝大家。
