評(píng)論
打印
I grew up on the coast of England in the '70s. My dad is white from Cornwall, and my mom is black from Zimbabwe.
我于上世紀(jì)七十年代，生長在英格蘭的海岸邊，我父親是來自康沃爾的白人，我母親是來自津巴布韋的黑人。
Even the idea of us as a family was challenging to most people. But nature had its wicked way, and brown babies were born.
對(duì)于許多人來說，是無論如何也想不到我們是一家人。但大自然自有意想不到的一面，棕色的孩子出生了。
But from about the age of five, I was aware that I didn't fit. I was the black atheist kid in the all-white Catholic school run by nuns.
但自從五歲開始，我就察覺出我的格格不入。我是一個(gè)信奉無神論的黑人孩子，在一個(gè)由修女運(yùn)轉(zhuǎn)的白人天主學(xué)校。
I was an anomaly, and my self was rooting around for definition and trying to plug in.
我是一個(gè)另類，我的自我在不斷尋找一個(gè)定義，并試圖將自己套入定義。
Because the self likes to fit, to see itself replicated, to belong. That confirms its existence and its importance. And it is important.
因?yàn)樽晕叶际窃敢馊ト谌耄吹阶约罕粡?fù)制，有歸屬感。那能確認(rèn)自我的存在感和重要性，這很重要。
It has an extremely important function. Without it, we literally can't interface with others.
這有一個(gè)極端重要的功能，沒有一個(gè)對(duì)自我的定義，我們簡直不能和其他人交流。
We can't hatch plans and climb that stairway of popularity, of success. But my skin color wasn't right.
我們無法制定計(jì)劃，無法爬上潮流和成功的階梯，但我的膚色不對(duì)。
My hair wasn't right. My history wasn't right. My self became defined by otherness, which meant that, in that social world, I didn't really exist.
我的發(fā)色不對(duì)，我的來歷不對(duì)，我的自我被他人定義，這意味著在社會(huì)上，我并不存在。
And I was "other" before being anything else -- even before being a girl. I was a noticeable nobody.
我首先被定義為一個(gè)另類，甚至先于被定義為一個(gè)女孩，我是一個(gè)引人注意的沒有人。
Another world was opening up around this time: performance and dancing. That nagging dread of self-hood didn't exist when I was dancing.
在這個(gè)時(shí)候，另一個(gè)世界出現(xiàn)了，那就是表演和舞蹈。對(duì)于自我糾纏不清的恐懼，在我跳舞時(shí)并不存在。
I'd literally lose myself. And I was a really good dancer. I would put all my emotional expression into my dancing.
我像是失去了自己，我是一個(gè)好的舞蹈演員，我會(huì)把我所有的感情投入到舞蹈中去。
I could be in the movement in a way that I wasn't able to be in my real life, in myself.
在舞蹈中，我能完成我在現(xiàn)實(shí)中自己無法做到的動(dòng)作。
