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Another is what I call noticing.
另外個技巧我稱它為"關注"。
This is usually giving a compliment.
一般在這種情況下要贊美別人。
I'm a big fan of noticing people's shoes.
我十分注意別人的鞋子，
I'm actually not wearing fabulous shoes right now, but shoes are fabulous in general.
雖然我現在并沒有穿特別搶眼的鞋子，但是總的來說，鞋子都是很棒的。
And they're pretty neutral as far as giving compliments goes.
而且一般在贊美的時候都是比較中立的著眼點。
People always want to tell you things about their awesome shoes.
人們總是愿意就他們的靚鞋多聊幾句。
You may have already experienced the dogs and babies principle.
你可能已經體會過了愛犬原則或者是嬰兒原則。
It can be awkward to talk to someone on the street; you don't know how they're going to respond.
和街道上的陌生人聊天可能會很尷尬——你不知道他們會怎么回應你。
But you can always talk to their dog or their baby.
但你總是可以對他們的寵物狗或者是小孩講話。
The dog or the baby is a social conduit to the person,
寵物狗或者是小孩就是那個人的社交引線。
and you can tell by how they respond whether they're open to talking more.
通過他們的反應，你可以判斷出他們是不是愿意多聊幾句。
The last one I want to challenge you to is disclosure.
我最后想要挑戰各位的一點是關于能否開誠布公。
This is a very vulnerable thing to do, and it can be very rewarding.
這是非常示弱的行為，但同時也會帶給你極大的回饋。
So next time you're talking to a stranger and you feel comfortable,
所以下一次，當你自在地與陌生人聊天的時候，
tell them something true about yourself, something really personal.
告訴他們一些真實的事情，說一些很私人的話題。
You might have that experience I talked about of feeling understood.
你可能會感受到我提到的那種被理解的感覺。
Sometimes in conversation, it comes up, people ask me, "What does your dad do?" or, "Where does he live?"
有時在交談的時候，有人問我：“你爸爸是做什么的？”或者“他住在哪里？”
And sometimes I tell them the whole truth, which is that he died when I was a kid.
有時候我會對他們完完全全講真話，也就是我爸爸在我小的時候就去世了。
Always in those moments, they share their own experiences of loss.
每當那種時刻，他們也會向我分享他們過世的親人的故事。
We tend to meet disclosure with disclosure, even with strangers.
一般來說，人們愿意彼此敞開心扉，對陌生人也不例外。
