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When I was a kid, I used to think that pork chops and karate chops were the same thing.
當我是小孩子的時候，我曾經認為“豬排骨”和“空手劈”是一樣的。
I thought they were both pork chops.
我以為它們都是豬排的意思。
And because my grandmother thought it was cute,
而我的奶奶覺得我這樣很可愛，
and because they were my favorite, she let me keep doing it.
而因為我喜歡這些，所以她并沒有糾正我。
Not really a big deal. One day, before I realized fat kids are not designed to climb trees,
這也不是什么大事。有一天我去爬樹，我才知道胖子是不適合爬樹的，
I fell out of a tree and bruised the right side of my body.
我從樹上摔了下來，身體的右側擦傷了。
I didn't want to tell my grandmother about it
我不想告訴我的奶奶，我怕惹麻煩，
because I was scared I'd get in trouble for playing somewhere I shouldn't have been.
因為本來去我那個地方玩就被認為是不應該的。
A few days later, the gym teacher noticed the bruise, and I got sent to the principal's office.
幾天之后，體育老師發現了我身上的傷痕，我被帶到了校長辦公室，
From there, I was sent to another small room
然后又從那里被轉到一個小房間，
with a really nice lady who asked me all kinds of questions about my life at home.
一個很和藹的女士問了我很多家里的事情。
I saw no reason to lie. As far as I was concerned, life was pretty good.
我實話實說。當時我感覺這一切都還蠻好的。
I told her, whenever I'm sad, my grandmother gives me karate chops.
我告訴她，每當我不開心的時候，我的奶奶就會給我“空手劈”。
This led to a full-scale investigation, and I was removed from the house for three days,
這引發了一次全面的（反虐待兒童）調查。我被從家里轉移出來，被托管了三天，
until they finally decided to ask how I got the bruises.
直到他們問起我身上的淤青是怎么來的。
News of this silly little story quickly spread through the school,
這個愚蠢的故事很快就在學校傳開了，
and I earned my first nickname: Porkchop. To this day, I hate pork chops.
我有了第一個外號：“豬排”。時至今日，我都討厭聽到“豬排”這個詞。
I'm not the only kid who grew up this way,
很多小孩的成長環境都跟我相似，
surrounded by people who used to say that rhyme about sticks and stones,
周圍都是一些成天舞刀弄槍欺負別人的人，
as if broken bones hurt more than the names we got called, and we got called them all.
仿佛肉體的傷痛比侮辱的外號帶給我們的痛苦更多，而我們同時感受到了這些痛苦。
