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This next act comes to us from the Motor city.
下一段演出，由來自汽車之城的表演者。
Please give it up for Mr. Darius the hilarious.
大家請掌聲歡迎，笑星達叔。
All right. How's everybody doing tonight?
臺下的觀眾今晚好嗎？
Who out there has a smart car?
臺下的觀眾有人開斯瑪特嗎？
Because I don't think it's smart to drive a half a car. You gotta laugh.
開"半臺車"在街上溜達，車主肯定不聰明。這不笑不行啊。
Oh, no. I ran out of fake laughter.
慘了，我逼真的假笑用完了。
Yeah, I mean, smart car. Have you seen this thing?
拜托哦，斯瑪特。你們看過這種車嗎？
It's like you driving around in a backpack. You gotta laugh.
這車就像個背包一樣的大小。這不笑不行啊。
Do we? Why don't we have a smart car write some jokes for you?
是咩？你叫斯瑪特幫你編段子可能還好笑些。
Yeah, well, I can see why you would defend the smart car.
你替斯瑪特辯護我也能理解啦。
It's the only car your feet can reach the pedals in.
只有這種車你的小短腿才夠得著踏板。
Yeah, but that's so true. He's very short!
說得好對啊，他真的很矮！
As is the car. It all lines up.
車也矮小，非常合理啊。
Look at this gray-haired scrub, man. Apparently black do crack.
大家快看這個灰發(fā)老鬼。原來黑人還會顯老。
Hey, Don Kng called. Said he want his whole head back.
唐金都打電話來了。叫你把他的頭還給他。
Max, look. Look how proud Earl is.
麥克斯，你看，厄爾好以兒為傲。
Hey, hey, hey, blondie. You mind not talking until I finish?
喂喂，金發(fā)妞。能等我表演完了再說話嗎？
Wait, a minute. You're probably just thinking, "Oh, my god. Shoes, shoes, hairbrush, shoes."
等等，估計你腦子里也只在想著，"我的老天，美鞋，美鞋，梳子，美鞋"。
Oh, my God. I actually was thinking about shoes!
我的老天啊。我剛的確是在想美鞋呢！
I'm sorry, there's a problem with your card. It's been declined.
抱歉，您的卡有點問題。顯示支付失敗。
