In the operating room I was equally confident. I knew I had the knowledge, the skill, the experience to handle any surgical situation I'd ever encounter in practice. There were no more butterflies in my stomach when I opened up an abdomen or a chest. I knew that even if the case was one in which it was impossible to anticipate the problem in advance, I could handle whatever I found. I'd sweated through my share of stab wounds of the belly, of punctured lungs, of compound fractures. I had sweated over them for five years. I didn't need to sweat any more.
在手術室里我也同樣充滿信心。我知道自己的知識、技術和經驗足以對付我在開業行醫中將會碰到的任何外科病例。當我切開病人的腹部或胸腔時,我不再緊張得瑟瑟發抖了。我知道,即使碰上事先無法預見其問題所在的病例,我也能處置我發現的任何情況。我戰戰兢兢地治療過交在我手下的腹部刺傷、肺部穿孔以及復合性骨折等病例。這類外科手術我已經戰戰兢競地干了五年。我再也不必擔驚受怕了。
Nor was I afraid of making mistakes. I knew that when I was out in practice I would inevitably err at one time or another and operate on someone who didn't need surgery or sit on someone who did. Five years earlier — even one year earlier —I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if I had had to take sole responsibility for a mistake in judgment. Now I could. I still dreaded errors — would do my best to avoid them — but I knew they were part of a surgeon's life. I could accept this fact with calmness because I knew that if I wasn't able to avoid a mistake, chances were that no other surgeon could have, either.
而且,我也不再怕犯錯誤了。我知道在我出去開業行醫時,說不定什么時候我就會不可避免地出差錯;我會給不需要手術治療的病人開刀,也可能會把需要動手術的病人忽略過去。五年前——甚至一年前——如果我不得不為一次判斷上的失誤負全部責任的話,我是沒法容忍自己的。現在我能了。我仍然害怕犯錯誤——愿意竭盡全力避免出錯——但我知道這是外科醫師生活的一部分。我之所以能夠平靜地接受這一事實,是因為我知道:如果我不能避免出差錯,那么換了任何別的外科醫生很可能也不能避免。
This all sounds conceited and I guess it is — but a surgeon needs conceit. He needs it to encourage him in trying moments when he's bothered by the doubts and uncertainties that are part of the practice of medicine. He has to feel that he's as good as and probably better than any other surgeon in the world. Call it conceit — call it self-confidence; whatever it was, I had it.
這些話聽上去很自負,而且我以為這的確是自負——但外科醫師就是需要這種自負。當他受到行醫中必定會遇到的重重疑慮的煎熬時,他需要“自負”來支撐自己度過這些難受的時刻。他必須覺得,他與世上任何一位外科醫生相比都毫不遜色,甚至還技高一籌。你管這叫自負也好,叫自信也罷;不管你叫它什么,反正我是有了。
來源:可可英語 http://www.ccdyzl.cn/daxue/201611/477147.shtml