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1. Good eye contact.
1. 良好的眼神接觸
Eye contact is your primary tool for establishing nonverbal connections with others. It communicates your level of involvement, interest and warmth. When speaking to others, ideally look directly into their eyes at least two to three seconds before looking away or moving to the next person. Merely glancing at someone for one second or less is known as eye dart and conveys insecurity, anxiety or evasion.The next time you’re in a meeting or giving a speech, ask a friend to count how long you look at specific individuals and if you visually engage with everyone in the room.
眼神接觸是你與其他人建立非語言聯系的主要工具。眼神接觸傳達了你的參與、興趣和熱情程度。當你和其他人說話的時候，理想情況是直接看著對方的眼睛至少2到3秒才將眼神移開或者移至其他人。只花一秒鐘或者更少的時間瞅一下對方，這叫做‘飛瞥’，傳達的是一種不安、焦慮或者逃避的情緒。下一次當你開會或者做演講的時候，讓一位朋友統計你和某些特定人物眼神接觸的時間，以及你是否與房間里的所有人有眼神接觸。
2. A confident handshake.
2. 自信的握手
Communicating through touch is another important nonverbal behavior. Always put your hand out to shake hands. A classic good handshake is one with full palm to palm contact.
通過身體接觸進行交流是另一種重要的非語言行為。每次都要把手伸出來與對方握手。經典的正確握手方式是手掌對手掌的完全接觸。
In business, the handshake is often the only appropriate expression of touch so it’s critical to have a good one. A good handshake consists of a full and firm handclasp with palms embraced web to web. Shake up and down once or twice, coupled with a sincere smile and eye contact. Avoid the extremes of either a weak limp handshake or an aggressive bone-crushing one. Strike the right balance—firm enough to convey confidence yet matched to the strength of the other person. Treat men and women with equal respect when shaking hands. Gender makes no difference, and either may initiate the handshake.
在職場上，握手通常是唯一一種合適的表達身體接觸的方式，因此正確的握手非常重要。正確的握手要求完整而且有力，手掌相互接觸。上下擺動一次或者兩次，并且伴隨真誠的微笑和眼神接觸。避免極端情況——手掌軟弱無力或者力氣太大令對方感到疼痛。應達到合適的平衡，用足夠的力度來傳達你的信心，但是要和對方的力度相適應。握手時，對男性和女性給予相等的尊重。握手與性別無關，并且任何一方都可以先伸出手。
3. Effective gestures.
3. 有效的姿態
A gesture is any physical movement that helps express an idea, opinion or emotion. Strive to punctuate your words with movement that is natural, lively, purposeful and spontaneous. Be genuinely yourself and let your motions match your message. Avoid common distracting mannerisms such as finger-pointing, fidgeting, scratching, tapping, playing with hair, wringing hands, and twisting a ring.
姿態是指幫助表達某種想法、意見或者情緒的肢體動作。在表達自己意見的時候，努力增加一些自然、生動、有目的性并且自發的姿態。表達真正的自己，并且讓你的動作與傳達的信息保持一致。避免那些經常出現、分散注意力的小動作，例如用手指指向其他人、坐立不安、撓癢、敲打物品、玩弄頭發、搓手以及轉動戒指。
4. Dressing the part.
4. 穿著得體
Shakespeare asserts in Hamlet, “For the apparel oft proclaims the man.” For men and women, clothing speaks volumes in the workplace. Make sure ‘business casual’ is not ‘business careless.’ Choose high quality, well-tailored garments that convey professionalism. Depending on your corporate culture, wear a business suit or at least a jacket for important meetings and presentations, especially with senior leaders and customers. Avoid showy accessories, busy patterns, tight garments and revealing necklines. Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. If career advancement is your goal, convey a polished professional presence in the workplace.
莎士比亞在《哈姆雷特》里面提到“以衣看人”。不管男性還是女性，穿著在辦公室具有重要意義。“確保‘商務休閑裝’沒有變成‘商務隨便裝’。選擇高質量、剪裁合身的服裝能令對方感受到你的職業精神。依照你所處的企業文化，挑選一套西裝或者至少一件夾克用來參加重要的會議以及活動，尤其是與高層領導人和客戶見面的時候。避免艷麗的配件、復雜的圖案、緊身衣服和露出領口。按照你想要從事的工作挑選衣服，而不是你所從事的工作。如果你的目標是要獲得晉升，應該在辦公室傳達一種令人眼前一亮的專業風采。
To complement your business attire, take steps to control perspiration; avoid cologne or perfume due to others’ possible allergies and sensitivities to smell; ensure fresh breath; and keep nails and hands neatly manicured.
為了完善你的商務裝，應采取措施控制身上的汗液；避免使用古龍水或者香水，因為其他人可能對這些氣味過敏或者較為敏感；確保口氣清新；保持指甲和手指修建整齊。
5. Authoritative posture and presence.
5. 權威性的姿態和儀容
Take up space. Use the arms on the chair, or stand with your feet a bit apart. A female leg stance in North America is with the feet typically 4 to 6 inches apart, and a male power stance starts with the feet more than 8 inches apart.
要占據一定的空間。使用椅子的扶手或者站立時雙腳稍微分開。在北美，女性的站立姿勢通常是雙腳分開4到6英寸，男性權力的姿勢是兩腳分開超過8英寸。
When you stand up tall and straight, you send a message of self-assurance, authority and energy.Whether standing or sitting, imagine a string gently pulling your head and spine toward the ceiling. Your weight is evenly balanced, feet solidly on the floor, arms and hands visible, relaxed and uncrossed. Good posture creates a dynamic commanding presence and an attitude of leadership. Conversely, bad posture signals to others that you lack confidence and have low self-esteem or low energy levels.
當你站直腰板的時候，你發出了一種自信、權威和能量的信息。不管你是站著或者坐著，請想象一條繩，從天花板上垂下來輕輕地拉著你的頭和脊梁。你的重量被平衡分布，雙腳堅實地站在地板上，手臂和手掌露出來、放松并且沒有交叉。優美的姿態創造一種威風凜凜的氣場，以及一種領導者的氣勢。相反，糟糕的姿態向其他人傳達的信息是，你缺乏信心并且擁有較低的自尊或低能量水平。
6. Appropriate facial expressions.
6. 合適的面部表情
Each of the seven basic human emotions (anger, contempt, disgust, fear, happiness, sadness and surprise) has been scientifically proven to have a certain facial expression associated with it. Because your facial expressions are closely tied to emotion, they are often involuntary and unconscious.
在科學上，七種基本的人類感情（憤怒、鄙視、厭惡、恐懼、快樂、悲傷和驚奇）都分別有特定的面部表情相配合，因為你的面部表情與情感密切聯系，它們通常都是非故意和無意識的。
Imagine the mismatched message when a fearful pensive face describes the life-enriching benefits of a new healthcare product. “Become aware of what your face is revealing to observers, and choose the expression that matches your intended message. For example, if you want to convey energy and enthusiasm, allow your face to become more animated. Practice in front of a mirror until it looks and feels natural. To show you’re paying attention while listening, hold a very slight smile, nod occasionally, and maintain good eye contact.
當一張令人畏懼、凝重的臉描述一款新的醫療保健產品所提供的令生活更加豐富的利益，這傳達的是一種非常不匹配的信息。請意識到你的臉部表情向觀察者所透露的信息，并且選擇符合你想要表達的信息的表情。例如，如果你想要傳達的是能量和熱情，請讓你的臉變得更加充滿活力。在鏡子前進行練習，直到表情變得自然。為了讓別人覺得你是在認真地傾聽，請讓面部略帶微笑，時不時地點頭，保持良好的眼神接觸。
7. Initiating interactions.
7. 發起互動
Be the first to make eye contact, offer your hand to shake, have an idea or solution, go into a room, and make the call. You can only afford to wait and go last when you are in the C-suite and ready to retire.
第一個進行眼神接觸、伸出手與對方握手、提出想法或者解決辦法、走到房間里以及打電話。只有當你成為企業最高層并且準備退休的時候，你才有資格等待并且最后出發。
8. Appropriate voice tone.
8. 合適的語音語調
If your significant other has ever said to you, “It’s not what you said, it’s how you said it,” they were referring to your paralanguage. Separate from the actual words used, these nonverbal elements of your voice include voice tone, pacing, pausing, volume, inflection, pitch and articulation. Like facial expressions, choosing the appropriate paralanguage is critically important because it conveys emotional meaning, attitude and impact.” Consider recording your side of several conversations throughout the day. Listen to the recordings and identify what your voice tone communicates.
如果你的“貴客”曾這樣跟你說，“原因并非在于你說什么，而是你說的方式”，他們指的是你的輔助語言。除了實際使用的言詞外，你的語言中還有一些的非言語元素，包括語音、語速、停頓、音量、音調變化、音高和清晰度。就像面部表情一樣，選擇合適的輔助語言是非常重要的，因為它傳達了情感意義、態度和影響。請考慮在一天當中的幾段對話里，將你的說話記錄下來。重聽錄音并且識別你的語音聲調要表達的意思。
9. Giving your full attention.
9. 給予充分重視
When speaking with a person, point your toes and square your shoulders toward them. This conveys attentiveness and creates open body language. Avoid angling your body away from them. Lean into the conversation; focus your eyes, ears and energy on them. These nonverbal cues clearly convey you respect, honor and appreciate the opportunity to meet with them. Make sure your arms and legs are uncrossed. Also, avoid multi-tasking during the interaction. Don’t check e-mail, look at your phone, send a text, check the scores, or disengage in any way. It shows disinterest and disrespect.
和別人對話時，腳趾朝著他們并且昂起胸膛。這傳遞的是專注并且創造開放的肢體語言。不要側著身子遠離他們。專注于對話；專注自己的眼睛、耳朵以及他們散發的能量。這些非語言的線索清晰地表達了你的尊重、珍惜以及感謝這個與他們見面的機會。請確保你的手臂和雙腿沒有交叉。此外，在對話期間不要做其他事情。不要檢查電子郵件、看手機、發短信、了解最新比分，或者做任何分心的事情。這展現的是不關心和不尊敬。
10. Responding to others' nonverbalcues.
10. 對其他人的非語言線索作出回應
When leading a meeting, speaking to a group, or interacting one-on-one, pay close attention to the other person’s body language and voice tone. Listen with your eyes. Their nonverbal cues can tell you when they: have a question, want to say something, agree or disagree, need a break, require more explanation, or have an emotional response.” By responding appropriately to others’ cues, you not only convey confidence in yourself, you show a high level of empathy, sensitivity and care for them which builds trust.
如果主持一個會議、向一個團體講話或者一對一互動，密切關注其他人的肢體語言和語音語調。傾聽的同時，用眼睛看對方。他們的非語言線索會告訴你他們何時提出問題、想要說什么、同意或者不同意、需要休息、要求更多解釋，或者作出情感反應。通過適當地對對方的線索作出回應，你不僅表達出對自己的信心，也展示了較高層次的同理心、敏感度和關心，這有利于建立互信。
