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Like that, you know. The answer -- the short answer to all those questions is, "Yes." Yes, I'm afraid of all those things.
我當時一直得到諸如此類的質疑。對于這些質疑，最簡單的回答是：“怕” 是的，這種種一切都讓人害怕。
And I always have been. And I'm afraid of many, many more things besides that people can't even guess at, like seaweed and other things that are scary.
直到今天也一樣，其實除了這些，我還害怕很多別人猜不到的東西比方說海草，還有其他嚇人的東西。
But, when it comes to writing, the thing that I've been sort of thinking about lately, and wondering about lately, is why?
但是，說到害怕寫作，我最近一直在想，我為什么要害怕寫作呢？
You know, is it rational? Is it logical that anybody should be expected to be afraid of the work that they feel they were put on this Earth to do.
這難道是一種理性的想法嗎？人們害怕從事自己命中注定的工作？這符合邏輯嗎？
And what is it specifically about creative ventures that seems to make us really nervous about each other's mental health in a way that other careers kind of don't do, you know?
創造性工作究竟有著怎樣的特殊性，以至于讓我們為彼此的心智健康擔心起來了呢？別的行業可不太會這樣，不是嗎？
Like my dad, for example, was a chemical engineer and I don't recall once in his 40 years of chemical engineering anybody asking him if he was afraid to be a chemical engineer, you know?
比方說，我爸爸是個化學工程師，在他40年的化學工程生涯中，我不曾記得有人問他是否害怕成為化學工程師。
"That chemical-engineering block, John, how's it going?" It just didn't come up like that, you know?
沒人說：“約翰，化學工作遇到瓶頸了嗎？怎么樣了？” 從來不曾發生過這種問話。
But to be fair, chemical engineers as a group haven't really earned a reputation over the centuries for being alcoholic manic-depressives.
當然，平心而論，化學工程師這一群體，并沒有在過去幾個世紀里，因酗酒吸毒、狂躁抑郁而享譽全球。
We writers, we kind of do have that reputation, and not just writers,
而我們作家，倒確確實實有著那樣的名聲，不僅作家，
but creative people across all genres, it seems, have this reputation for being enormously mentally unstable.
各個領域的創作人才似乎都有著情緒極不穩定的惡名。
And all you have to do is look at the very grim death count in the 20th century alone,
只需看看上個世紀，各個領域偉大創作天才們英年早逝的案例，
of really magnificent creative minds who died young and often at their own hands, you know?
常常是年紀輕輕死于自殺，
And even the ones who didn't literally commit suicide seem to be really undone by their gifts, you know.
即使那些沒有自殺的，往往也沒有完全展現出他們的才華。
Norman Mailer, just before he died, last interview, he said, "Every one of my books has killed me a little more."
諾曼梅勒，在去世前的最后一次采訪中說：“我的每一本書都蠶食了一部分的我”。
An extraordinary statement to make about your life's work.
對于你畢生的作品，這是多么激進的說法啊。
But we don't even blink when we hear somebody say this,
但我們對此類說法卻視若無睹，
because we've heard that kind of stuff for so long and somehow we've completely internalized and accepted collectively this notion that creativity
因為我們早已見怪不怪了，且不知為何，人們都已經完全內化接受了這一觀念。
and suffering are somehow inherently linked and that artistry, in the end, will always ultimately lead to anguish.
這種觀念就是：創造力和痛苦息息相關，藝術創造最終一定會導致極度苦悶。
