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Don't be flattered that he misses you. He should miss you. You're deeply missable.
不要受寵若驚于他想念你。他應該想念你。你太悲慘了。
However, he's still the same person who broke up with you.
然而，他依舊是那個跟你說分手的人。
Remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he's choosing, every day, not to be with you.
記住，他思念你的唯一原因就是他選擇了每一天都跟你分開。
The "But It Really Takes the Pressure off of Us" Excuse
“但是它真的給我們減輕了壓力“的借口
Dear Greg,
親愛的格雷格，
I was seeing a guy for about a month.
我跟一個男人約會一個月了。
He broke up with me, saying that he didn't feel like it could be something serious.
他跟我分手了，說他不覺得這是段認真的感情。
I understood and took it well. He wanted to know if we could still hang out as friends. I said sure.
我理解而且接受了。他想知道我們能否繼續像朋友一樣出去玩兒。我說當然可以。
Now we get together and go out and then come back to his place and have sex, just like we did before. (But now, we're "broken up." )
現在我們在一起，一起出門，回他家做愛，就像我們以前那樣。（但是現在我們是分手的。）
He's really, really cute and I love having sex with him.
他真的很帥，我很愛跟他做愛。
I also think he must like me if he can't stop being around me.
我也覺得他一直在我身邊一定是喜歡我的。
And I think it's kinda cool—all the pressure's off and we're having a great time together.
而且我覺得這很酷——沒有壓力了，我們在一起的時光很愉快。
I've decided that I think it's fine and I'm not going to call his attention to the fact that we're actually dating.
我決定我認為這很好，我不打算告訴他我們其實正在約會的事實。
Except for the fact that we broke up.
除了我們已經分手的事實。
Signed Cheryl Lynn
謝麗爾 琳恩
Dear Breaking Up Is Easy to Do,
親愛的分手是件容易事兒，
My God, this guy is brilliant.
我的天，這哥們太聰明了。
He goes out with you, dates you, breaks up with you, then continues to sleep with you, which basically absolves him of all responsibility toward your feelings.
他跟你出去，約會，分手，然后繼續跟你睡，基本上為自己免除了對你感情的一切責任。
After all, you're not going out anymore. It's genius! It's diabolical!
畢竟，你不會再去跟別人約會了。這太聰明了！這太兇殘了！
He should be writing a book, not us!
他應該寫本書，而不是我們！
In fact, I bet this guy could get his own little cult going if he wanted to.
事實上，我打賭這哥們兒要是想的話，可以收獲一些個人崇拜。
And let me guess, you'd be happy to sign up for that as well.
讓我猜猜看，你一定也很樂意去報名參加。
For the record, this guy doesn't "like you so much that he can't stop being around you."
準確的來說，他哥們兒并非“太愛你了以至于無法停止圍繞在你身邊。”
Because here's what guys don't do if they can't live without you: They don't break up with you.
因為這才是離開你就無法生活的男人不會做的事：他們不會跟你分手。
This guy is so seriously not into you, it's crazy.
這哥們兒完全不喜歡你，這很瘋狂。
The only way you're going to figure out how into you you are, is how fast you get rid of him.
讓你清楚自己有多喜歡對方的唯一途徑就是，你要多久能擺脫他。
Greg
格雷格
