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6. Table Manners in Anglo-America
英美餐桌禮儀
"Oh, no! Here I am at an American family's home at the dinner table.
“哦，糟糕！此刻我坐在一個美國人家里的餐桌前吃晚餐。
There are all kinds of plates, saucers, cups, and silverware at my place.
在我眼前有各式各樣的盤子、碟子、杯子和銀制餐具。
Which should I use for which food?
該用哪種餐具盛哪一道食物呢？
Should I sit down first or wait for the host to invite me?
我應該先坐下來還是等主人來招呼呢？
Should I have brought a gift? Someone please tell me what to do!"
我是不是應該帶了禮物才來嗎？有誰來教教我該怎么做！”
Have you ever been in or had a nightmare about this situation?
你是否曾經置身或經歷過像這樣可怕的情形呢？
Don't worry! This article will help steer you through the rocks and reefs of Anglo-American table manners
別擔心！本篇文章將助你破除英美餐桌禮儀的重重障礙，
so that if you are ever abroad in Canada or the United States, or at someone's home from one of those countries, you will feel right at home.
如此一來，以后如果你出國到加拿大或美國，或到這兩國人士的家中作客，便能怡然自得了。
It is important to distinguish what kind of occasion you will be attending before you plan for a pleasant evening.
在計劃過個愉快的夜晚之前，先分清楚要參加的是哪一種場合是很重要的。
Most Anglo-Americans enjoy entertaining at home, but they don't enjoy stuffy, formal dinners.
大部分英美人士喜歡在家里招待客人，而不喜歡沈悶的正式晚宴。
They invite their friends over for a fun evening, not as a test of one's knowledge of cultural traditions.
他們邀請朋友到家里來是為了過個快樂的夜晚，而不是要測試一個人的傳統文化知識。
If, however, you are invited to a formal affair, such as a so-called "sit-down" dinner,
然而，如果你應邀參加一個正式場合，例如所謂的“安排就座”晚宴，
you may want to know in advance some basic rules of "black tie" etiquette.
也許你會想事先知道一些正式宴會禮節的基本規范。
The first thing to remember when attending a dinner at a Western home is that you are the guest and that you are a foreigner.
當你參加西方家庭的晚宴時，首先要記住的是：你是客人，而且是個外國人。
No one will invite you if he does not really want you to enter his "castle," so you can be sure that you are wanted.
如果不是真要讓你進入他的“城堡”，人家不會邀請你，所以你可以確定你是受歡迎的。
Additionally, as you do not come from the same country or culture as your host, he or she or they will surely be aware of this,
除此之外，因為你來自和主人不同的國家和文化，他或她或他們當然會明白這點，
and will be very forgiving if you unintentionally do or say something which would otherwise offend them.
所以假使你無意間做了或說了某些冒犯他們的事時，他們會非常寬宏大量的。
Keeping these two simple tips in mind should greatly ease your concern about being present at a dinner in someone else's home.
記住這兩個簡單的準則應該就能大大消除你到別人家用餐的憂慮。
Before arriving at your host's home, you may want to make sure of three things.
在到達主人家之前，你可能要先確定三件事情。
First, be a few minutes late, say, about five to ten minutes if possible.
首先，要晚到幾分鐘，譬如說5～10分鐘左右，如果可能的話。
Never be early, as the host may not have everything prepared yet.
千萬不要提早到，因為主人可能尚未一切就緒。
Nor should you be more than 20 minutes late.
但你也不要遲到超過20分鐘，
Your host may begin to worry about whether you are able to attend the dinner or not.
否則人家會開始擔心你是否能來赴宴。
Next, as to whether to bring a gift, in most informal gatherings, it is not necessary.
其次，關于要不要帶禮物，在大部分非正式的聚會中是不需要的。
If you like, you can bring some fruit or sweets, or, especially if there is a hostess, some flowers.
你若高興的話，可以帶一些水果或甜點，或者，尤其是有女主人的話，可以送一些花。
These are thoughtful, cheerful gifts sure to please.
這些都是體貼、令人愉快的禮物，一定會討人喜歡。
Do not bring alcoholic beverages unless you are sure of your host's or hostess's preferences in drinks.
不要帶酒類飲料，除非你確知主人或女主人偏愛什么酒。
Above all, do not spend a lot of money, and never give money.
更重要的是，不要花太多錢，而且絕不要送禮金。
As we say in English, "It's the thought that counts."
就像我們在英文中說的 "It's the thought that counts."（“禮輕情意重”）。
Finally, wear comfortable clothing. One can overdress as well as appear sloppy.
最后，穿著舒適的衣服。過度打扮以及顯得邋遢都不好。
For a special occasion or religious holiday, such as a retirement party or Christmas,
在特別的場合或宗教節日，如退休宴會或圣誕節時，
a tie and jacket would be suitable for the gentlemen and a dress or sweater and skirt for the ladies.
男士宜穿西裝打領帶，女士則穿洋裝或毛衣加裙子。
For more formal affairs, you will probably be told what to wear, such as "formal dress requested," etc.
在較正式的情況中，你可能要照規定穿著，例如“請著正式服裝”等等。
A tie and jacket or tuxedo for the gents and an evening gown for the ladies would be in order here.
此時，男士宜穿西裝打領帶或穿燕尾服，女士則穿晚禮服。
If you are unsure what to wear, you can always ask the host.
如果你拿不準該穿什么服裝，問主人就好了。
Gifts are seldom appropriate for these affairs, unless for a wedding reception, at which gifts are more customary than cash.
在這些情況送禮通常不適當，除非是結婚宴席，在習俗上大多是送禮物而非現金。
Your host in his home will usually motion you where to sit.
屋里的主人通常會招呼你就座。
At formal gatherings, name cards are sometimes provided, or you will be told where to sit.
在正式的聚會中，有時會擺出寫上名字的卡片，要不然人家會告訴你座位。
Do not be alarmed by a great deal of cutlery: simply start from the outside and work your way in.
不要被一大堆刀叉餐具嚇著了：只要由外往內按順序使用就行了。
Formal affairs often have several courses of food with the appropriate cutlery for each dish.
正式宴會常會有幾道菜須使用特定的刀叉餐具，
There is no harm in checking with your neighbor to see what implement he is using.
這時不妨咨詢一下鄰座的人看他用什么餐具。
After all, "When in Rome, do as the Romans do."
畢竟，人總要“入境隨俗”嘛。
It is customary to ask others to pass dishes to you for self-serving;
習慣上可以請別人將菜傳給你自己來盛；
at a formal dinner party, there is usually catering (service).
在正式晚宴上則通常會有分菜（服務）。
Again, do not hesitate to ask others for information or advice.
同樣地，不要猶豫不敢向他人請益，
They are usually pleased to help you.
他們通常都會很樂意幫助你。
The most important piece of advice is this: enjoy yourself.
最重要的一個忠告是：好好享受。
No host enjoys seeing nervous or fearful guests who are struggling to "do the right thing" at his home or expensive formal dinner party.
作東的人都不樂于見到客人在他家中或昂貴的正式晚宴上，神情緊張或害怕地努力要讓自己的舉止合宜。
Watch others or ask for their advice, and join in the conversation and good times as best you can.
觀察別人或向他們請教，盡可能地融入談話和歡樂當中。
If you do, after the first such evening out, you will certainly look forward to the next!
如果能做到這樣，初次嘗過甜頭之后，你就一定會很期待下一次的晚宴了！
