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Hello, I am Dr. Sheldon Cooper.
大家好，我是謝爾頓博士
Welcome to Sheldon Cooper Presents: Fun with Flags.
歡迎收看由謝爾頓·庫珀出品的《有趣的旗幟》
Before we get started, I'd like to announce the winner of our design your own flag competition.
節目開始前我想先公布設計旗幟比賽的贏家
But I can't.The only entry was from GameyGamer75,and I know that was a jpeg of your buttocks.
可惜沒有。唯一的參賽作品來自網友"愛咪福樂75"我知道你上傳的是自己屁股照片
Now this week we have a very special episode where we explore the flags of the popular entertainment franchise, Star Trek.
本周這集十分特別我們將介紹熱門影集《星際迷航》中的旗幟
And to help me, I'm pleased to introduce Internet personality,former star of Star Trek: The Next Generation,
我很榮幸請到這位來幫忙的特邀嘉賓網絡名人《星際迷航: 下一代》劇中演員
and the only guy I know lucky enough to be immortalized in 1/16 scale set phasers to "Fun"...
并且是我認識的唯一一位有幸被按比例做成小人偶的朋友將激光槍設至歡樂檔改編自《星際迷航》中的句子"set phasers to stun"（將激光槍設至擊暈檔）
for my friend, Wil Wheaton.
歡迎我的好友 威爾·惠頓
Hi, Sheldon. Thanks for having me.
謝爾頓，感謝你的邀請
I'm happy to be here. Cut.What's wrong?
很高興能上貴節目.停,怎么啦
Sorry, Sheldon, you were brilliant as always.
謝爾頓，你的表現如往常一樣精彩
Wil, that was a little wooden.Wooden?
威爾,你有點太呆板了,呆板嗎
Don't worry, it wasn't terrible.
別擔心，也沒那么爛
Just, this time, try to say it the way people sound. And action.
但這次可以像正常人一樣說話嗎?開拍
My friend, Wil Wheaton.
我的好友威爾·惠頓
Hi, Sheldon. Thanks for having me.I'm excited to be here.
謝爾頓，感謝你的邀請我很興奮能上貴節目呢
So, Wil, what do you have for us first?
威爾，你將從哪一面旗幟開始介紹呢
Well, this is an exciting one.
這面旗非常有意思
This is the flag of the United Federation of Planets.
這是星際聯邦的旗幟
Now what's interesting about this flag...Cut.
這面旗有趣的地方在于... 停
What was wrong with that?
又怎么了
It's called "Fun with Flags."They're not at halfmast, nobody died.Let's try and keep it upbeat.
這節目叫"有趣"的旗幟，不是有人死了在降半旗哀悼，歡樂喜慶點好不好
Um, no offense，but I've been acting since I was a kid.
我無意冒犯但我從小就開始演戲
I think I can handle a Web show without a lot of direction.It's true.
上個網絡節目我應該不需要人家教。此話不假
In 1982, Wil played the voice of Martin the mouse in The Secret of NIMH.
在1982年，威爾就替卡通電影《勇敢鼠媽媽》里的一角配音了
You moved me.You'll have to forgive me.
你感動了我。原諒我的吹毛求疵。
This is my first time directing, I just want it to be good.
我第一次當導演 只想盡善盡美
So do I. Great.So, this time let's try more real boy, less Pinocchio.
我也是，很好。那這次就請你像個真男孩而非小木偶
And action.And cut.You realize that I'm doing this for free, right?
開拍，停。你知道我是無償友情客串的吧
Yes. And so far, we're still not getting our money's worth.
但目前為止，無償都有點不值回票價呢
Let's try it again.Everybody's having fun.And action.So, Wil...what do you have for us first?
再來一次。大家開開心心。開拍，威爾你要先介紹哪面旗幟呢
Well, this is an exciting one.
這面旗十分有意思哦
This is the flag of the United Federation of Planets.Cut.
這面旗可是星際聯邦的旗幟，停
Problem, first time director?Oh, none that I could see.
有問題嗎？"新手"導演我是沒發現啦
I saw a man who loved flags almost as much as I do.
我只覺得你跟我一樣熱愛旗子
I got goose bumps.He was overacting on purpose.Really?
都起雞皮疙瘩了，他故意夸張演出。真的嗎
He reminded me of a young William Shatner.
讓我想起電影里寇克船長小時候呢
Listen, Sheldon, I'm really happy to do this for you,but not if she's gonna be a huge pain in the ass the whole time.
謝爾頓，我很樂意上你節目但她要在這當找茬精的話，那就算了吧
You gonna let him speak to me like that?Well...
他這么說我你居然沒意見嗎？這個嘛...
you're my girlfriend and I don't want you to be upset.
你是我女朋友我不想你不高興
Then again, Wil Wheaton's my friend and I don't want him to be upset.
但威爾·惠頓也是我朋友我也不想他不高興
This is a sticky wicket.
真是進退兩難啊
What do you think?
你有什么看法
Can I speak to you for a second?
我們去一邊談談
I'll be right back.
我馬上回來
Feel free to play with yourself.
歡迎你"自娛自樂"
I don't care for your friend,he's being rude to me.
我不管他是不是你朋友他對我出言不遜
You need to ask him to leave.
你得叫他滾蛋
Amy, I can't just ask Wil Wheaton to leave.
艾米 你怎么能叫他滾蛋呢
He's a minor celebrity.
他好歹也是個二線明星
Once you explain who he is, many people recognize him.
只需費點唇舌解釋，人們還是能認出他的
Fine. Then maybe I should go.
行 那我走可以了吧
Could you? That would solve everything.
真的嗎 那問題就能迎刃而解了
You are the best. I'll see you at dinner tonight?
你最好了。今晚晚餐見嗎？
You sure you wouldn't rather have dinner with your friend Wil Wheaton?
你不會想跟你的好友威爾一起共進晚餐嗎？
Come to think of it, I would!
細想一下 我還真想呢
You, little lady, are on fire.
小妞你今天棒呆啦
Every time we eat dinner here,your mother refuses to let me help with the dishes.
每次來吃晚飯你媽媽都不讓我幫忙洗碗
Don't take it personally. She likes doing them by herself so she can lick the plates with no one looking.
別往心里去她想自己洗碗單純是怕被別人看她偷舔碗盤
You ready to go?
準備好要回去了嗎
Yeah, let me just grab a couple of fresh turtlenecks.
行 我拿幾件洗好的高領衣就走
I don't understand why you keep your stuff here when there's plenty of room at home.
咱們家那么多地方干嘛還要把東西統統都留在這里啊
What are you talking about?
哪有這回事
All I have here is a few sweaters, books, bank stuff, computers,mail, collectibles, medicine and my electric body groomer.
我就留了幾件外套書，銀行東西，電腦信件，收藏品，藥物跟電動除毛機
Ooh, there's my plaid dickie.
我的格子紋小圍脖
Oh, got this at the Goodwill store for 50 cents.
我在二手店花五毛錢買到的呢
Can you believe it? 50 cents sounds right.
不敢相信吧？感覺就值這個價呀
Let's go. You know, it's kinda late.Why don't we just spend the night here?
走吧。有點晚了呢？何不干脆在這里過夜
Because we don't live here. I know.
因為我們不住在這里啊。我知道
Do you? You said when you got back from space you were gonna move into my apartment,but half the time we stay here.
你真知道嗎？你自己說從太空回來后就搬進我公寓但半數時間我們都住這里
That's not true. Howard, I'm doing laundry!
才沒有呢。霍華德，我要洗衣服了！
You want me to put anything in for you?!
有什么需要我幫你洗的嗎
There's some underwear in the hamper!
籃子里有我的內褲，拿去洗吧
Oh, good! I got that new stain stick to try out!
非常好！我剛好要試試新去漬棒
Thank you! I only put it on the list two weeks ago!
謝謝你做我"兩周前"要求的事啊
Okay, I see what you're getting at.
好吧，我懂你意思了
How about this weekend
要不這周末吧
I'll box up all my things and move them to our place. Thank you.
我把所有東西都打包搬回咱家，謝謝
The lightsabers are gonna look great in the living room.
這兩把光劍放在我們客廳肯定很帥
Or in the closet. We can decide later.Howard, help!
放衣柜里也不錯。到時候決定吧。霍華德，幫幫忙！
My hand's stuck in the garbage disposal!
我的手卡在食物垃圾處理機里了
Let go of whatever piece of food you're holding!
那你把手里抓著不放的食物放開啊
Are you kidding?! It's a perfectly good chicken leg!
你不是吧？是一根完好無缺的好雞腿呢！
Hey, look who's out after dark, like a big boy.
某人像個大男孩一樣，夜游晚歸哦。
I was out raising heck with Mr. Wil Wheaton.
我跟威爾·惠頓去共進晚餐了
Four hours more and we would have closed down the HomeTown Buffet.
再讓我們吃個四小時就能吃垮"家鄉"自助餐廳了
I thought you had plans with Amy. Yeah, I did,but then Wil called Amy a pain in the ASS.
你不是跟艾米有約了嗎？是啊，但威爾說艾米是找茬精
She got huffy and left,then Wil and I headed out to dinner.
她就不爽走人了然后我就跟威爾一起去吃晚飯了
That place really did remind me of my hometown.
"家鄉"自助餐廳 真的有家鄉味呢
Because there we also have a HomeTown Buffet.
因為我家鄉也有一家"家鄉"自助餐廳
Hold on. Wil and Amy had an argument?
等等 威爾跟艾米吵架啦
Yes, quite the kerfuffle.
對啊 挺劍拔弩張的
Then Amy got mad and left?
然后艾米火大走人啦
Walked right out the door.And you...?
奪門而出一去不返。然后你...
Enjoyed a delightful dinner at a reasonable price.
跟威爾開心地吃了頓好價錢的晚飯
The manager recognized Wil and let us sit right next to the frozen yogurt machine.
餐廳經理認出了威爾同意讓我們坐在冰酸奶機旁呢
Right next to it!
正旁邊哦
I was closer to it than I am to you right now.
比我現在跟你的距離還近呢
Buddy, I think Amy might be upset.Why's that?
兄弟，艾米可能在不高興哦。為啥啊
Because your friend was rude to her,and then you went to dinner with him.
你的朋友對她出言不遜你還跟他一起去吃晚飯
You're just repeating what I said.
這不就是我剛才說的而已嗎
It's like living with a lactoseintolerant parrot.
你這只乳糖不耐癥的學舌鸚鵡
Trust me, call her.
聽我的 打給她吧
Fine. It's a shame you didn't go to dinner with us, because the buffet you're about to enjoy only serves humble pie,a dessert much less tasty than frozen yogurt.
行。你沒跟我們一起吃晚餐真可惜因為你等下就只能嘗到屈辱的滋味了跟冰酸奶的味道完全不能比哦
I was this close. What?
當時就坐這么近，有何貴干？
You'll appreciate this.
跟你說個笑話
Leonard has some ridiculous notion that you're mad at me.
萊納德腦子抽風 說你在氣我
Tell him you're not mad at me.
告訴他沒這回事
Go ahead, set him straight.
說吧 給他個痛快
I'm mad at you, Sheldon.
我是氣你啊 謝爾頓
Eat one of your Luna bars.
吃根巧克力棒吧
Very often when women think they're angry, they're really just hungry. I'm not hungry.
女人常以為自己在憤怒其實只是肚子餓而已啦？我不餓
Your friend insulted me, and you didn't do anything.
你朋友羞辱我，你也不干嘛
Precisely, I didn't do anything.
對啊 我什么都沒干啊
Now does someone feel like checking her emotional math?
某人是不是該仔細想想自己在說啥啊
Keep going, buddy, you're doing great.
繼續吧兄弟 我看好你哦
Sheldon, I'm your girlfriend,and you should have taken my side.
謝爾頓，我是你女朋友你應該幫我的才對啊。
That's it. End of story. Good night.
就這樣吧。我說完了。晚安。
Wow, Amy's mad and Leonard was right.
哎喲，艾米在生氣。萊納德說得對。
What a weird day.
今天真不可思議
Hey. Sorry this took so long.
抱歉 讓你們等這么久
But you used to work here, you know how it is.
你以前也在這打工過，你懂得
Kitchen slammed again?
廚房又出事了嗎？
No, I'm a terrible waitress, remember?
是我只是個爛服務生 忘了嗎
So, is there anything I can do to help you with the move tomorrow?
你明天要搬家我有什么能幫你的嗎
Now that you mention it,I was thinking tomorrow might not be great.
正好你提到此事我覺得明天不是一個搬家的好日子
What's your excuse this time? No excuse.
你又有什么借口了？沒借口
It's just, you know, I'm Jewish, and technically,we're not supposed to drive or carry anything on the Sabbath.
只是呢 我是猶太人嘛 嚴格來說安息日的時候我們得休息 不適合搬家
So this one's on God.
怪神別怪我啊
That might be a little more convincing if you didn't have a mouthful of bacon cheeseburger.
要想賴神跟習俗可以但你滿嘴豬肉起司漢堡，誰信啊（猶太人不吃豬肉）
My religion's kinda looseygoosey.
我不是一個忠實信徒嘛
Basically, as long as you got your schmekel clipped and don't wear a cross, you're good.
簡單來說，只要乖乖犧牲包皮（割禮）不戴十字架也沒事啦
Howie, you promised you'd move.And I will.
華仔，你答應過我會搬家的。我會啊。
Yeah, right. I will.
誰信啊，我真的會搬
I'm obviously not going to live in my mother's house for the rest of my life. I'm not a child.
我怎么可能會一輩子都賴在我媽的家里不走呢 又不是小孩
I've seen her burp you.
我見過她幫你拍嗝
She did not burp me.
她不是幫我拍飽嗝
She was patting me on the back, and I happened to burp.
只是她拍我的背 我剛好打了個嗝
Don't you have other tables you should be waiting on?
你不用去招待其他客人嗎
Yeah, but I told you, I'm not good at my job.
要啊 但我也說了 我是個爛服務員
Bernadette, listen to me.
伯納黛特 相信我
He is never gonna leave.
他死也不會搬走
I'm starting to think you're right.
我開始覺得你是對的
All right, I've had enough of this.
好吧 我受夠了
I'm a grown man, I have a successful career.
我是個成年人 我有成功的事業
For the love of God, I've been to space!
看在上帝的份上 我還去過太空呢
I will move out when I'm ready,and I don't need anyone badgering me into it!
當我準備好時我就會搬出去住我不需要任何人沒完沒了地煩我
