評論
打印
Okay, I've got the kosher cookbook, salt, flour, sugar, new mixing bowls,
我買了猶太潔食食譜，鹽，面粉，糖，新的攪拌碗
and I stopped at the goodwill and got us two appropriately sad schmatas to wear for tomorrow. Let's start.
還去了趟善心二手店，買了兩件明天穿的端莊素色衣服。開工吧
Start? I'm already half done.
什么開工，我都做一半了
How could you be half done? You didn't have any kosher ingredients.
你怎么可能做完一半了。你又沒有潔食用的材料
Oh, they'll never know, we'll just tell them they're kosher.
他們又吃不出來，我們說是潔食的就行了
Oh, my God, we can't do that.
天啊，不可以這樣
Oh, my God, we just did.
天啊，已經這樣了
They have to be kosher. Do you want God to smite us?
必須做成潔食才行。你就不怕遭天譴嗎
What's he gonna do? Take away all my good luck and your fortune?
老天還能怎么懲罰我們？收回我的好運和你的億萬家財嗎
You think all those things labeled low fat are low fat? It is just a sales gimmick.
難道寫著低脂的食物真是低脂的嗎？不過是銷售把戲罷了
I had a low cal ice cream bar once that popped my top Jean button.
有次我吃了根低卡冰棒，我牛仔褲的扣子立馬就給崩了
Kosher isn't a sales gimmick. It's thousands of years of tradition. We have to respect that.
猶太潔食不是銷售把戲。是人家千年來的傳統。我們得尊重人家啊
I don't respect anyone's tradition. That's kind of my tradition.
我從不尊重任何人的傳統。這就是我的傳統
Well maybe that's because you didn't grow up around a family.
也許是因為你成長過程中沒有家人陪在身邊吧
Hey, I grew up with a lot of families. The Manson family, the Jackson family, the Menendezes.
我成長過程中有無數家人好嗎？曼森家，杰克森家，米南德茲家
Wait, is that Menendezes or Menen-di? Either way, they were like brothers to me.
等等，是念米南德茲還是米南戴茲？反正他們都待我如兄長
Max, we are doing these straight up kosher.
麥克斯，我們就老老實實做潔食吧
Fine. But return those new bowls, I don't need them.
好吧。你把新攪拌碗拿去退了吧，不需要
I can just dump the bacon bits out of this old one.
我把培根都撈出來就能接著用了
Max, please, let's just start the cupcakes over, drop them off, get me some antibiotics, come home, and put me to bed.
麥克斯，你就得重新做吧，明天交貨，收錢，買抗生素，然后回家，讓我上床養病
All right, I'll make them kosher.
行行行，我做成潔食就是了
I mean, it's the least you could do after you lied to that woman and let her think you were one of them.
這也是你欠人家的，誰讓你騙了人家還讓她誤以為你是猶太人
Hey, I don't know who my father is. I could be half Jewish.
我又不知道我爹是誰。我很可能有一半猶太血統啊
Although it's more likely I'm half bartender who demanded my mom figure out a way to pay her tab.
不過我更可能是酒保的女兒，可能當年我媽被拐著"酒債肉償"
