評論
打印
Did it light? No.
點著了嗎？沒有
Try another one. The gas is on.
再試一次，瓦斯還開著呢
Why are we throwing fire at an oven?
為什么要對烤箱丟火柴啊
Is this a poor people game?
這是窮人的娛樂游戲嗎
Yeah, it's called light the broken pilot light without blowing our faces off!
是啊，這叫"烤箱打火器壞掉，瞎點怕會毀容的悲催游戲"
This is ridiculous. My heart is pounding.
太蠢了吧，害人家小心肝怦怦跳
I didn't know baking cupcakes was an extreme sport.
現(xiàn)在才知道，烤小蛋糕也是種極限運動
It's like the Deadliest Batch.
就好比《致命烘培》
See? A slight hint of gas in the air makes everything funnier.
看到?jīng)]，吸入少量外泄瓦斯會讓你覺得什么事都好笑
Now there's too much gas.
現(xiàn)在外泄太多了
If we threw a math in there now, I'd be out a nose or a pair of eyebrows.
如果現(xiàn)在丟火柴，估計我的鼻子或眉毛就完蛋了
And I'm not living through that again.
我不要回歸"無眉"的日子
Again?
回歸
When I was a little girl, I was trying to make a Hungry Man dinner.
我小時候試圖烤過一次冷凍晚餐包
And I lit the pilot light too soon and whoosh!
結(jié)果點火太快，火光一閃
No eyebrows.
眉毛沒了
Had to draw them on in magic marker.
不得不用油性筆畫眉毛
Only Mexican girls would talk to me.
結(jié)果只有粗眉的墨西哥女孩愿意跟我說話
Max, we have a cupcake business.
麥克斯，我們有生意要做
We have to tell the landlord we need a new oven.
必須讓房東給我們換個新烤箱
We can't ask the landlord for a new oven.
我們不能跟房東要個新烤箱
Then he'll ask us stuff like "who are you?
不然他會問"你是誰"
why is your name not on the lease, and where's the rent?"
"你的名字怎么沒在租約上，該交的房租呢"
Well, I'll buy us one.
好吧，我出錢買
Really? You're gonna buy us a whole oven?
是嗎，你要給咱們買個新烤箱
We're so poor I have a sock that I refer to as my good sock
我窮的連丟失一只的那雙襪子都能稱它為"好的那雙"呢
I've been saving something for an emergency,
我藏了點私貨以備不時之需
Like a burst appendix or a first date bikini wax.
比如急性盲腸炎，或首次約會的除毛費
I knew it!
我就知道
You have a secret stash of your father's missing billions.
你老爸的億萬家財肯定被你私藏了不少
We're rich!
我們發(fā)達(dá)啦
Wait, it's other people's money.
等等，那都是別人的血汗錢
Yeah, but I didn't steal it. We're rich!
不過又不是我偷的，發(fā)達(dá)啦
They're my expensive rings.
這些是我的名貴戒指
So if these are your expensive rings,
如果這些才是你的名貴戒指
What's all that other stuff you wear?
那你平常戴的是啥
Cheaper copies. You never wear the good stuff out in public.
便宜復(fù)制品。才不會把名貴戒指戴出門呢
Got it, kind of like hiding the Banana republic, and wearing the Gap.
懂了，就像是高檔潮牌留家中，平民潮牌穿出門
See how special?
看，多別致啊
They're all one-of-a-kind from
每個都是獨一無二的
Thomas Aristotle Thomas. T.A.T. TAT.
托馬斯·亞里斯多德·托馬斯戒指，簡稱托托戒
What?
什么
Tat rings. You've never heard of TAT rings?
托托戒啊，你沒聽說過托托戒嗎
Oh! TAT rings. No.
哇，托托戒，沒聽過
I guess it's the kind of thing that only people in the know know, you know?
我想這東西應(yīng)該只有懂行的人才懂，懂嗎
No.
不懂
Make all the jokes you want,
隨你怎么笑話
but I only have to sell one of these, and I can get us a new oven.
不過，我只要賣掉其中一個，就夠錢給我們買新烤箱了
Any ideas what kind we should get?
要什么款式，有想法嗎
Uh, yeah, you're not the only one with a secret stash.
當(dāng)然有，又不是只有你才藏有私貨
It's the Bluestar.
這款叫藍(lán)色之星
It's the TAT rings of ovens. In purple!
是烤箱界的托托戒啦！還是紫色的
That's right, I said purple.
沒錯，我就是說紫色的
It's the muscle car of ovens. It's bad-ass!
這是烤箱界的肌肉猛車，絕對霸氣啊
It's so bad-ass when I do karaoke I change the lyrics from purple rain to purple range.
霸氣到我去唱卡啦OK時，我把歌詞"紫雨"都改成了"紫款"了
Great, we'll get this one.
很好，那就買這個吧
Uh, we can't buy that. It's too expensive.
買不起，太貴了
This is just something you fantasize about. It's kitchen porn.
這種夢幻烤箱只能意淫一下。就像廚具黃片
Fine. Tomorrow we'll go to the Cash for Gold store.
好吧。明天咱們就去當(dāng)鋪當(dāng)戒指
And get a regular oven and get cookin'.
然后買個普通烤箱回家開烤烤喲
I think the funny gas is gone.
瓦斯散光了，害我冷場
Must be time. I'm going in.
時機已到，重赴沙場
Let me do it, my eyebrows need to waxed anyway.
讓我來吧，我的眉毛也該修了
Hurry up! The gas is on! Throw the match in!
快點，瓦斯開著呢，丟火柴進去啊
Did it light? No, but my foot is on fire.
點著了嗎？你成功點著了我的腳
I'll do it.
我來吧
You're good. You're good.
你眉毛還在。你眉毛還在
