現在,為充分說明友誼底這第二種功用起見,我們再一談那個顯而易見的、流俗之人也可以注意到的那一點,就是朋友底忠言。赫拉克里塔斯在他底隱語之一中說得很好,“干光永遠最佳”。一個人從另一個人的凈言中所得來的光明比從他自己底理解力,判斷力中所出的光明更是干凈純粹,這是無疑的:一個人從自己底理解力與判斷力中得來的那種光明總不免是受他底感情和習慣底浸潤影響的。因此,在朋友所給的諍言與自己所作的主張之間其差別有如良友底凈言與諂佞底建議之間的差別一樣。因為諂諛我者無過于我;而防御自諂自諛之術更無有能及朋友之直言者也。諍言共有兩種:一是關于行為的,一是關于事業的。說到第一種,最能保人心神之健康的預防藥就是朋友底忠言規諫。一個人底嚴厲自責是一種有時過于猛烈,蝕力過強的藥品。讀勸善的好書不免沈悶無味。在別人身上觀察自己底錯誤有時與自己底情形不符。最好的藥方(最有效并且最易服用的)就是朋友底勸諫。許多人(尤其是偉大的人們)因為沒有朋友向他們進忠告的緣故,做出大謬極誤的事來,以致他們底名聲和境遇均大受損失,這種情形看起來是很可驚異的。這些人是,有如圣雅各所說,“有時看看鏡子,而不久就會忘了自己底形貌的”。講到事業方面,一個人也許以為兩只眼所見的并不多于一只眼所見的;或者以為局中人之所見總較旁觀者之所見為多;或者以為一個在發怒中的人和一個默數過二十四個字母的人一般地聰明;或者以為一枝舊式毛瑟槍,托在臂上放和托在架上放一樣地得力;他可以有許多類此的愚蠢驕傲的妄想,以為自己一身就很夠了。然而能使事業趨于正軌者還數忠言。又,假如有人想采納別人底忠告,而愿意零碎采納,在某一件事上問某一人,在另一件事上問另一人,這樣的辦法也好(這就是說,總比他全不問人的或者好一點);可是他冒著兩種危險;一是他將得不到忠實的進言;因為所進的言論必須是來自一位完全誠心的朋友的才好,否則鮮有不被歪屈而傾向于進言人之私利者也。另一種危險是他所得的進言,將為一種有害而不安全的言論(雖然用意是好的)一半是招致禍患的而一半是救濟或預防禍患的;有如你生病請醫,而這位醫生是雖被認為善治你所患的病癥,卻是不熟悉你底體質的;因此他也許會使你目前的疾病可以痊愈而將危害你健康的另一方面;結果是治了病癥而殺了病人。一個完全通曉你底事業境遇的朋友則不然,他將小心注意,以免因為推進你目前的某種事業而使你在別的方面突受打擊。所以最好不要依靠零零碎碎的忠告;它們擾亂和誤引底可能多于安定和指導底可能也。
After these two noble fruits of friendship (peace in the affections, and support of the judgment), followeth the last fruit; which is like the pomegranate, full of many kernels; I mean aid, and bearing a part, in all actions and occasions. Here the best way to represent to life the manifold use of friendship, is to cast and see how many things there are, which a man cannot do himself; and then it will appear, that it was a sparing speech of the ancients, to say, that a friend is another himself; for that a friend is far more than himself. Men have their time, and die many times, in desire of some things which they principally take to heart; the bestowing of a child, the finishing of a work, or the like. If a man have a true friend, he may rest almost secure that the care of those things will continue after him. So that a man hath, as it were, two lives in his desires. A man hath a body, and that body is confined to a place; but where friendship is, all offices of life are as it were granted to him, and his deputy. For he may exercise them by his friend. How many things are there which a man cannot, with any face or comeliness, say or do himself? A man can scarce allege his own merits with modesty, much less extol them; a man cannot sometimes brook to supplicate or beg; and a number of the like. But all these things are graceful, in a friend's mouth, which are blushing in a man's own. So again, a man's person hath many proper relations, which he cannot put off. A man cannot speak to his son but as a father; to his wife but as a husband; to his enemy but upon terms:whereas a friend may speak as the case requires, and not as it sorteth with the person. But to enumerate these things were endless; I have given the rule, where a man cannot fitly play his own part; if he have not a friend, he may quit the stage.
在友誼底這兩種高貴的功效(心情上的平和與理智上的扶助)之后還有那最末的一種功效:這種功效有如石榴之多核。這句話的意思就是朋友對于一個人底各種行為,各種需要,都有所幫助,有所參加也。在這一點上,若要把友誼底多種用途很顯明生動地表現出來,最好的方法是計算一下,看看一個人有多少事情是不能靠自己去辦理的:這樣計算一下之后,我們就可以看得出古人所謂“朋友者另一己身也”的那句話是一句與事實相較還很不夠的話;因為一個朋友比較一個人底己身用處還要大得多。人底生命有限,有許多人在沒有達到最大的心愿——如子女底婚事,工作之完成,等等——之前就死了。要是一個人有了一位真心的朋友,那末他就大可安心,知道這些事件在他死后還是有人照料的。如此,一個人在完成心愿上簡直是有兩條性命了。一個人有一個身體,而這個身體是限于一個地方的;但是假如他有朋友,那末所有的人生大事都可算是有人辦理了。就是他自己不能去的地方,他底朋友也可以代表他的。還有,有多少事是一個人為了顏面底關系,不能自己說或辦的!一個人不能自承有功而免矜夸之嫌,更不用說是不能表揚自己底功績了;他有時也不能低首下心地去有所懇求;諸如此類的事很多。但是這一切的事,在一個人自己底嘴里說出來未免赧顏的,在朋友嘴里說出來卻是很好。類此,一個人還有許多身份上的關系,是他不能棄置不顧的。例如,一個人對兒子講話,就不能不保持父親底身份;對妻子講話就不能不保持丈夫底身份;對仇敵講話就不能不顧慮自己底體面:但是一個朋友卻可以就事論事,而不必顧慮到人底方面。這一類的事情要--列舉出來是說不完的;要之,一個人若是有某種事自己不能很得體地去做時,我對他有一條規則可說,就是,他如果沒有朋友的話,那末他只有“下臺”之一法