We are not, habitually, a nation of stress-busters. If anything, stress is busting us. According to a report this week by the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development, stress has overtaken the usual suspects – RSI, disease, back pain – to become the most common cause of long-term absence from work. Tighter budgets, tougher workloads and, most of all, the looming threat of job losses are to blame.

　　我們不是一個對解壓已經習以為常的國家，即便是有，也是壓力在蹂躪我們。英國特許人事和發展協會本周發表的調查報告中稱，壓力超過重復性勞損，病痛，背痛這些常見的病因，成為導致工作中雇員長期缺勤最常見的罪魁禍首，壓力源于預算緊縮、工作量增加，最普遍的是對下崗的擔憂。

　　Conventional stress-busting, it seems, is failing us. So perhaps it's time for some new ideas. Here are five top tips for hardcore workplace stress relief:

　　傳統的解壓方法視乎越來越沒有效果，或許現在應該去嘗試一些新的方法。下面是針對緩解長期辦公室壓力排名前五的小貼士。

　　1. Connect with nature

　　Turn your office into a tropical paradise with the sounds of the rainforest. If you play them off an iPod you’ll be asked to turn it off, but fill the office with actual macaws, frogs and gibbons and your colleagues just won’t know what to do. You will: chillax.

　　1. 親近大自然

　　多在辦公室里聽聽雨林的聲音，把辦公室變成“熱帶雨林的天堂”。如果只是在iPod上播放這些聲音，別人肯定會叫你關掉，當辦公室里到處是鸚鵡、青蛙和猿猴的聲音時，同事就沒辦法了。你將會：淡定。

　　2. Win small battles

　　Someone in the office driving you particularly mad? Stroll over and offer to pick them up a tea, then come back with a coffee instead. You can safely pretend it was forgetfulness. They'll know it was really spite.

　　2. 贏場小戰

　　辦公室里是否有人讓你非常生氣？隨意地走過去問他們要不要喝杯茶，然后給他們倒杯咖啡回來。你可以假裝忘了，但是他們會明白這是一頓教訓。

　　3. Sweat it out

　　Exercise is the most effective weapon in the fight against stress. Unless, of course, you’re a fitness instructor, and you’re stressed because you’re doing too much exercise. If that’s you, try to nap it out. For the rest of us though, exercise is vital, so what better way to bring down your stress levels than by taking up boxing and inviting hated colleagues and superiors to join you for a lunchtime bout? We all daydream about punching the boss. Why not do it? The exercise will help them de-stress too.

　　3. 出出汗

　　運動是舒緩壓力最有效的武器。除非你是一名因運動過量而感到壓力的健身教練，如果你真是這樣的一名教練，那就別再動了。對于我們其他人而言，運動非常重要，有什么比學習拳擊然后在休息時邀請你討厭的同事或領導來一場友誼賽更加能緩解壓力的方法呢？我們一直在幻想能夠毆打老板，為什么不付諸實踐呢？運動也能幫他們放松放松。

　　4. Get some perspective

　　When things get really tough, try to remind yourself: it doesn’t really matter. Those books can go unmarked, those markets unanalysed, that coronary unperformed. In the grand scheme of things, turning up in court to defend your client is as pointless as polishing bread. Which is not to say don’t do it. Just do it in the comforting knowledge that all life is futile and will soon end.

　　4. 心態放寬

　　在工作非常辛苦的時候，盡量提醒自己：無所謂。書可以不署名，市場分析可以不做，甚至冠心手術也可以不做。萬物蕓蕓，出庭為你的客戶辯護看起來就像擦面包般毫無意義。并不是不去做，要做，但要懷著萬物皆渺小，終將歸于塵土的心態去做。

　　5. If all else fails, get out of there

　　Fake your death and embark on a new life in the Bahamas. It’s never too late to begin again. Just remember: futile. Will soon end.

　　5. 如果一切都很失敗，離開吧

　　假裝你已經死了，然后到巴哈馬群島去過新生活。重新開始永遠不會太遲。只要記住：萬物皆渺小，終將歸于塵土。