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每日英語

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每日笑話(5.11):The "Calm" Master

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The "Calm" Master

There was another master, She was born as a Golden Snail. She was sitting with the disciples one day -- together with the silver snails, the copper snails, the metal snails and the aluminum snails; the various kinds of snails according to their inner development.

They were talking in the middle of dinner or lunch, and suddenly there was an earthquake; very, very, very strong . Everyone was running as fast as a snail could; here and there, up and down, in and out. They bumped into the glass door, and everything. It was all very chaotic. The house of the snails was shaking like this and all their horns were kind of twisted together.

The earthquake lasted about three minutes in these circumstances. After the earthquake finished, everyone went back to their seats and said, "Wow, thank God that's over!"

The Master Snail was sitting there with Her horns up. (They don't have noses, they just have horns.) She just stuck Her two very long and fat horns up in the sky, and was quiet for a while until the disciples could not bear it any longer and asked the Master, "What is it?"

Because they knew every time the Master stuck Her golden horns like that, She is about to make a very grand statement, some big lecture of how to become Buddha in one second, things like that. So, they were very, very nervous and expecting. But the Master kept on sticking the horns up and didn't say anything.


Finally, the half-golden and half-silver attendant said, "Please, be compassionate, oh Master. What is it? Tell us the great thing that You have in Your mind now? Don't hesitate longer for all sentient beings are thirsty for the Truth."

So, the Master slowly descended Her horns to an ordinary level of consciousness so that all the disciples could understand. If Her horns were too high, I don't think the ordinary sentient snails could ever have caught up. Now She lowered Her horns up to here, like this and said, "Did you see I was very calm during the earthquake?"

All the snails said, "Oh, yes, Master! Oh, yes!" The Master continued further, after a pause so that people felt more appreciative, "Did you see that I didn't run here and there like all of you fools?" The disciples said, "Of course, of course." And all their horns clapped together in unison to praise the Master.

Now the Master Snail said, "Did you see that I calmly sat here, sipping tea while you were running here and there like that?"

The disciples said, "Yes, we saw You calmly sitting here drinking, but that was the soy sauce that You drink, not the tea."

"鎮定"的師父

以前曾有一位師父,她投生成為一只金蝸牛。有一天,她和徒弟們聚在一起,根據內在的發展程度,他們之中有銀蝸牛、銅蝸牛、鐵蝸牛、鋁蝸牛等各種蝸牛。大家正在聚餐聊天。忽然像發生了非常、非常、非常強烈的地震.所有的蝸牛都盡其所能的以最快速度奔跑,跑來跑去、跑上跑下、跑進跑出,撞在玻璃門上和其它東西上面,場面非常混亂。蝸牛們的房子像這樣震顫著,觸角也纏繞在一起,在這種情形之下,地震持續了大約三分鐘之久。

地震過去之后,每只蝸牛都回到原來的座位上,他們說:「哎唷!感謝上帝,終于過去了!」

「蝸牛師父」坐在那里,觸角高高豎起(蝸牛沒有鼻子,只有觸角),又長又胖的觸角,豎在空中,她一直沉默不語。徒弟們忍不住了,問師父說:「怎么了?」

他們知道,每次師父把她的金觸角這樣豎起來,她就會發表非常重大的開示、偉大的講經,或是如何在一秒鐘內成佛之類的事情。

所以他們非常、非常、非常緊張并急切地期待著,但師父只是豎起觸角,什么也不說。

最后半金半銀的蝸牛侍者說:「請求師父慈悲開示,告訴我們您現在想到的重大事情。為了所有渴望真理的眾生,請您不要再遲疑?!?/P>

因此師父慢慢把觸角升到一般情況的高度,好讓所有徒弟都能聽懂;因為如果她的觸角太高的話,普通的蝸牛會聽不懂;所以她把觸角降低下來,然后說:「你們有沒有看見,地震的時候我是多么的平靜?」

所有蝸牛都說:「哦!有,師父!有!」

師父停頓一下,為使大家更佩服,她繼續說:「你們有沒有看見,我并沒有像你們這些傻瓜一樣跑來跑去?」

徒弟們答道:「當然,當然?!顾麄兊挠|角都拍在一起來贊美師父。

然后師父說:「你們那樣跑來跑去時,有沒有看見我平靜地坐在這里喝茶?」

徒弟們回答:「有,我們看見您平靜地坐在這里喝飲料,不過…您喝的是醬油,不是茶?!?/P>

重點單詞   查看全部解釋    
chaotic [kei'ɔtik]

想一想再看

adj. 混亂的

聯想記憶
consciousness ['kɔnʃəsnis]

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n. 意識,知覺,自覺,覺悟

聯想記憶
sentient ['senʃənt]

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adj. 有知覺的,知悉的

聯想記憶
earthquake ['ə:θkweik]

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n. 地震

 
compassionate [kəm'pæʃənit]

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adj. 有同情心的 vt. 同情

 
minutes ['minits]

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n. 會議記錄,(復數)分鐘

 
attendant [ə'tendənt]

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adj. 伴隨的
n. 服務員,侍從,伴隨物,

聯想記憶
twisted ['twistid]

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adj. 扭曲的 v. 扭動(twist的過去式)

 
understand [.ʌndə'stænd]

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vt. 理解,懂,聽說,獲悉,將 ... 理解為,認為<

 
aluminum [ə'lju:minəm]

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n. 鋁

 
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