Xiaohua: Hello, and welcome to Round Table’s Word of the Week.本周我們來討論一個非常實用但是又比較三俗的話題，怎么說去上廁所，尤其是上大號？
John: Right, so the question here that we are trying to address is not necessarily about going to the bathroom, but we are going to be looking at how to say I need to poop. Now the thing is there are many different ways in English, usually slang, but you have to remember, usually, most of the slang is not going to be what we call polite company. A lot of things are considered to be quite vulgar and usually younger men tend to use many of these phrases. That’s a bit of disclaimer first of all, because you don’t necessarily just want to be going around using these words in front of the people especially you don’t know very well, but at the same time they are interesting bits of culture.
Xiaohua: 這個聲明還是蠻必要的。很多關于上大號的說法，其實都是在英語中屬于俚語的說法。大家聽就聽了，千萬不要在比較正式的場合隨便用出來。
John: Exactly, so first I want to take a look at one of the most simple, is going number 2. In English, we say going pee is number 1 and going poop is number 2.
Xiaohua: This actually has a direct Chinese translation. We say the same thing, 上一號，上二號。
John: Oh, really? But you can also say that you have to drop a deuce. And deuce, I am not quite sure where that word comes from, but it also means number 2. So drop a deuce would be the same thing is saying I need to go number 2.
Xiaohua: drop a deuce也可以是二號，上大號的意思。
John: Right. And then, of course, there is a take a dump, right? So drop a deuce, take a dump and drop the kids off at the pool, so we can say in English there is a lot of dropping kind of imagery there.
Xiaohua: 這個動詞聽上去不是很雅觀，但是我有一個問題: drop the kids off at the pool is that means you are going or your kids are going?
John: No, so the point is that the toilet bowl is the pool and the poop or the turds are the kids.
Xiaohua: It’s the kid. Oh, my god!
John: Sometimes people say drop the Cosby kids off at the pool. Bill Cosby and his TV show. He had, I think, four or five kids in that show and they are all black. And usually poop is brown, so Cosby kids.
Xiaohua: OK, a little bit politically incorrect.
John: Slightly politically incorrect. But I don’t think anyone would have a big deal with it. Looking at some more interesting ones I wasn’t familiar with before we prepared for the show. Download a brown-load.
Xiaohua: Download a brown-load. I don’t know how to translate that. Anything brown doesn’t bold very well for me.
John: Yeah, exactly. So here is the interesting one, so this is one of the phrases from one of these Austin Powers movies. One of the characters, he says I’ve got a turtle head poking out. But more commonly, people say I’m prairie-doggin. So a prairie-dog is a type of rodent that lives on the American plains in the mid-west. And it’s a type of rodent that it digs holes, pops its head out a little bit and then retreats back down if it senses danger.
Xiaohua: prairie dog就是草原鼠。
John: So I’m prairie doggin. It just means you really, really have to go, like it’s almost impossible to actually keep it under control you might say. Here is a really funny one, again very, very cultural. I have to take the Browns to the Super Bowl. The Super Bowl is the championship of American football of the NFL. Now the Cleverland Browns are a notoriously bad team, so it’s funny obviously because they call the Browns and poop is brown, but also because the Browns never go to the Super Bowl.
Xiaohua: Oh, I see. Taking the Browns to the Super Bowl可不是帶克利夫蘭布朗隊去超級碗比賽，而是上大號的意思。
John: Exactly. And last but not least, this one is actually one of my favorites, because it’s just so amazingly descriptive. I have to pinch a loaf.
Xiaohua: Pinch a loaf, I’ve actually heard of that as well. Is it really a vulgar way of saying it? Can somebody use it without causing trouble?
John: Like what I have said before, this isn’t about necessarily vulgar or using bad words or anything like that, but you wouldn’t use these phrases in polite company, like if you just met someone, more than likely, using these words and phrases will not score you any points if you will. It won’t score you any browny points. Instead people might think that maybe you are a little bit rude or perhaps you don’t understand what to say in the right context. In general, the best rule to follow is that if you want to tell someone that you need to use the bathroom, just say you need to use the bathroom. You don’t need to tell them that you need to go poop or you need to pee, just say I need to go use the bathroom.
Xiaohua: That’s right. And that’s probably the safest and best way of describing the situation.
John: Exactly. But then again if you are hanging out with someone like me and you really have to poop, or you can just say John, I get to go take a dump.
Xiaohua: Ok. And that’s all for Word of the Week of Round Table.