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34. English Small Talk Topics: What Is OK and What Is Not?
用英語閑聊的禁忌
"When in Rome, do as the Romans do."
“入鄉隨俗。”
What may be perfectly acceptable to talk about in one culture may offend or even shock others when in a different culture.
在某文化里可以完全被接受談論的話題，在另一個不同的文化里可能就會得罪人，甚至可能會嚇著對方。
Accordingly, it is important to know what topics are "safe" to discuss with strangers or acquaintances from a different background.
因此，了解什么話題可以“安全的”跟不同文化背景的陌生人或熟識的人交談是件很重要的事。
Topics which can be discussed freely within a culture are referred to as "small talk."
在同一文化中可以高談闊論的話題我們就稱之為閑聊。
As with any other language, English has its own stock of non-offensive topics.
就如所有其它的語言一樣，英語里也有一些不會得罪他人的閑聊話題。
Among these are the weather, occupation, immediate conditions, family and family life, and school or work.
這些話題包括了天氣、職業、目前個人的狀況、家人與家居生活、學校或者是工作。
Topics in English which should never be broached include one's personal life, physical appearance (unless complimentary), income, and age as well as religious, sexual, or political views.
英語中禁忌的話題則包括了個人生活、外貌（除非是贊美的話）、收入、年齡以及宗教信仰、性觀念或政治觀點等。
Each of these topics——both approved and taboo —— will be discussed more detail later.
這些被允許的以及禁忌的話題將容后逐一詳細說明。
Small talk is extremely useful when first meeting others.
與人初次見面時，閑聊是非常管用的。
Actually, one purpose of small talk is not to find out the answers to questions like "How are you?" or "Nice day, isn't it?"
事實上，閑聊的目的之一并非要如何回應“你好嗎？”或“天氣不錯吧，是不是？”等這類問題，
but rather to gauge whether the person is the sort whom one would like to know better.
而是判斷對方是否是我們想進一步認識的那種人。
While talking about essentially unimportant matters such as the weather, life in the office, or how many children —— if any —— one has,
在談論一些無關痛癢的話題時，如天氣、辦公室生活或是對方有多少小孩（若對方有的話），
each speaker has the opportunity to determine whether the other is cooperative, interesting, potentially useful or friendly, etc.
談論雙方每個就有機會判斷對方是否合作、有趣、有所幫助或友善等等。
If a person answers the inquiry about the weather with a grunt or "I hate sunny days," no further energy need be wasted!
談到有關天氣的問題時，對方若哼啊一聲敷衍了事，或說：“我討厭艷陽天，”那就甭再浪費唇舌了。
Another purpose of small talk, once a speaker is satisfied that the other person is worth talking with, is to explore possible areas of interest or cooperation.
閑談的另一目的就是，一旦滿意對方且了解對方值得交談后，談話人就要探究彼此可能感興趣及合作的范疇。
By tactfully going through "safe topics," some information may be revealed which leads the speaker(s) into a deeper discussion,
透過巧妙運用“安全的話題”，便可獲知一些信息進而促使雙方作更深一層的談論，
especially when a topic is a shared hobby or interest.
尤其是話題與彼此嗜好或興趣有關的時候。
Talking about the weather may reveal that one speaker enjoys recreation like camping or hiking.
談論天氣透露對方可能喜歡露營或遠足等休閑活動。
Shooting the breeze about one's family may disclose similar shared family hobbies like board or card games or barbecues and picnics.
而閑聊家庭的話題則可顯露彼此相似的家居嗜好，如下棋、紙牌游戲、烤肉及野餐等。
In other words, small talk may serve as probing of the other person's personality and lifestyle.
換言之，閑聊可用來探知對方的個性和生活方式。
"Everybody complains about the weather, but nobody ever does anything about it," so goes an old saying.
俗話說：“人人怨天氣，無人管天氣。”
Perhaps the safest of all small talk topics is the weather.
因此，或許天氣可說是最安全的閑聊話題了。
Whether good or bad, a comment about the temperature or sky condition (sunny day, cloudy day, rainy day, etc.) never offends.
談論氣溫或天候（晴天、陰天、雨天等），評語不論是好是壞，永遠都不會得罪人。
Commenting on the crowded traffic or the late bus, or high prices in the department store (immediate conditions) is also always appropriate.
至于交通擁擠、公交車遲到或百貨公司的物品售價太高等（臨時發生的話題），也是很適合的。
Similarly, most people do not mind talking about their work, family, or school life, either, since for most people these are experiences held in common.
同樣地，大多數人也不介意談論他們的工作、家庭、或學校生活，因為對大多數人而言這些都是大家共同的生活經驗。
Even so, asking whether someone is married or not crosses over into personal information and therefore should be avoided.
即使如此，若是詢問對方是否已婚時則就涉及私人問題，因此就應避免提及。
If the speaker happens to mention that he or she has children or is married, however, it is all right to pursue the topic.
對方若不經意提及自己有小孩或已婚時，追著這個話題發揮就無妨了。
Asking such questions as "How much do you weigh?" "How old are you?" or "How much do you earn?" are taboo in English, at least as starters for conversation.
“你多重？”、“你幾歲？”或“你收入多少？”等的問題在英文里是個禁忌，至少不可用作閑聊的開場白。
Only when friends are close would they ask such questions of each other.
只有熟朋友才會彼此問這樣的問題。
Likewise, for most people, religious or political convictions or sexual mores are considered private matters.
同樣地，對大多數人而言宗教信仰、政治立場及性觀念等話題也都屬于個人隱私。
These should not be discussed until one speaker offers his opinion first.
除非對方先發表他的看法，否則不應談論這些話題。
It is not necessary, though, to respond in kind.
不過，你也不用跟著回應你的看法。
The other speaker can change the subject to show that this is a taboo subject.
對方可能會改變話題，以表示這個話題是個禁忌。
Foreigners are usually "forgiven" the "indiscretion" of asking others offending questions.
外國人在閑聊時如果不慎提及禁忌的問題通常是會被原諒的。
Still, it is not a good idea to wear out one's welcome.
但是，因此而損及對方對你的好感也是不智的。
When a subject has been turned down, only a tactless person would pursue it.
當對方已拒談某個話題時，只有不上道的人才會追著這個話題談下去。
Being sensitive to others' feelings and sense of privacy will win more friends and influence more people than a reckless line of questioning.
敏感察覺對方的感覺及對隱私的注重，要比胡亂問一連串問題能使你贏得更多的朋友，也影響更多的人。
When curiosity seems to be getting the upper hand, remember that "Silence is golden."
當好奇心蠢蠢欲動時，切記這句話：“沉默是金。”
