As a kid, I spent my summers with my grandparents on their ranch in Texas. I helped fix windmills, vaccinate cattle, and do other chores. We also watched soap operas every afternoon, especially "Days of our Lives." My grandparents belonged to a Caravan Club, a group of Airstream trailer owners who travel together around the U.S. and Canada. And every few summers, we'd join the caravan. We'd hitch up the Airstream trailer to my grandfather's car, and off we'd go, in a line with 300 other Airstream adventurers.
在我還是一個孩子的時候,我的夏天總是在德州爺爺奶奶的農場中度過。我幫忙修理風車,為牛接種疫苗,也做其它家務。每天下午,我們都會看肥皂劇,尤其是《我們的歲月》。我的爺爺奶奶參加了一個房車俱樂部,那是一群駕駛氣流拖掛型房車的人們,他們結伴遍游美國和加拿大。每隔幾個夏天,我也會加入他們。我們把房車掛在爺爺的小汽車后面,然后加入300余名氣流房車探險者們組成的浩蕩隊伍。
I loved and worshipped my grandparents and I really looked forward to these trips. On one particular trip, I was about 10 years old. I was rolling around in the big bench seat in the back of the car. My grandfather was driving. And my grandmother had the passenger seat. She smoked throughout these trips, and I hated the smell.
我愛我的爺爺奶奶,我崇敬他們,也真心期盼這些旅程。那是一次我大概十歲時的旅行,我照例坐在后座的長椅上,爺爺開著車,奶奶坐在他旁邊,吸著煙。我討厭煙味。
At that age, I'd take any excuse to make estimates and do minor arithmetic. I'd calculate our gas mileage -- figure out useless statistics on things like grocery spending. I'd been hearing an ad campaign about smoking. I can't remember the details, but basically the ad said, every puff of a cigarette takes some number of minutes off of your life: I think it might have been two minutes per puff. At any rate, I decided to do the math for my grandmother. I estimated the number of cigarettes per days, estimated the number of puffs per cigarette and so on. When I was satisfied that I'd come up with a reasonable number, I poked my head into the front of the car, tapped my grandmother on the shoulder, and proudly proclaimed, "At two minutes per puff, you've taken nine years off your life!"
在那樣的年紀,我會找任何借口做些估測或者小算術。我會計算油耗還有雜貨花銷等雞毛蒜皮的小事。我聽過一個有關吸煙的廣告。我記不得細節了,但是廣告大意是說,每吸一口香煙會減少幾分鐘的壽命,大概是兩分鐘。無論如何,我決定為奶奶做個算術。我估測了奶奶每天要吸幾支香煙,每支香煙要吸幾口等等,然后心滿意足地得出了一個合理的數字。接著,我把頭探到車前排,拍了拍奶奶的肩膀,然后驕傲地宣稱,“每天吸兩分鐘的煙,你已經少了九年活頭了!”